For the second episode it works but improvement...
... is still worth considering.
I deeply apologize to you Chris. In my review of TOME Short: Hackers, I was somewhat concerned with you simply dumping a short a month after the first episode and I accused you of saying that it met your quota for the month. What happened was I didn't check your twitter feed (because apparently I'm the only freak in the world who doesn't use twitter) and didn't see you were hard at work with this episode until after I wrote my review.
My point however back then with the characters still stood.
However, this episode brought me exactly what I was looking for when I said I wanted some sort of character development and foreshadowing. Granted the only thing I learned about Gamecrazed is that he's got a noble heart, but that's a start compared to simply being "the stoic." (Although that's sort of a given since he's one of the heroes.)
We're given foreshadowing on an event most TTA veterans will be looking forward to, but we're given tight lips about it so those that have not seen the original series will be certainly pleased when the event comes.
I do have a few concerns though, some of them are minor, others might alienate the audience, and the rest is simply stuff that can be considered.
As far as story is concerned, the whole "Are you Doubling's sister?" thing brought up was well, are strong point on the criticism side. So if I'm in TOME and I create a character that is a Swordsman whose power is Ice, does that mean I'm related to Nylocke? I don't see why there can't be other Slime users in TOME... Aside from "Well she might like what her brother likes" or "She feels Slime would benefit to her goals" it doesn't make much sense to simply ask that. Perhaps there would've been another way to deduce she was related to Doubling, like the swearing.
My second concern is the language. Now, I certainly have a grasp at the demographic you're pursuing, the 12 year olds that constantly give you a 10 regardless, and the demographic that the more caustic reviewers have a problem with you pursuing. Yes guys, this is Newgrounds, but Chris is trying to create a story that adheres to standard "shonen" archetypes. He's going after this kind of audience that enjoys this stuff. Now as far as you're concerned Chris, I recommend not including such language if this is the demographic you're trying to appease. I'm not saying stop censoring it and let it go free, but don't use it entirely, Adding fuck doesn't add much to the characters, there are other cues to the toughguy persona than simply spouting fuck every five seconds.
My third concern, and this is VERY minor, is that the dialogue flow is somewhat lacking. The characters somewhat sound like the voice actors are just reading off their lines without the feel that the characters are actually speaking to each other.
My final concern, and again very minor, is this story feels like you would have needed to watch TTA to get the overall feel of the series. I want to look at it as though I never watched TTA before. You're working on it, but it still feels like I just need to watch TTA to get the feeling of what's going on, or read any supplementary material to get into the story. I still know nothing about the character's motivations, although this episode made it clear that Kirbopher and Nylocke don't know Gamecrazed enough and wish for him to open up more.
Looking forward to Episode 3, Chris. I once again apologize for my brash issues early on, and I do plan to support the series in any way I can (Such as the $11 donation for the "put a character you designed in TOME as a Background character" and the fanart I'm working on.) and perhaps I should learn how to use Twitter so I don't make the mistake of accusing you of being lazy ever again.
I do suggest however to at least glance some of the people who gave more in-depth reviews, particularly anything related to story issues since your intent is to make a story-based series.