Yesterday, this man came into Best Buy while I was visiting my brother, David, who works there. I had left David for a minute to look at the RAM, and I heard a customer walk up and ask him for help. What ensued was the funniest retail scenario I'd ever witnessed, including all the ridiculous ones I'd had at my three years of working at Books-A-Million (my job before my current one).
Man: I'm looking for a hard drive for my computer.
David: Did you want an external drive or an internal one?
Man: I need to replace the one that's already in it. A friend of mine told me it had gotten corrupted or crisped or something when lightning struck our house.
David: You'll want an internal one then. Do you know how much memory you want in it?
Man: Hang on a sec... wrote it down... I want one with at least 20 jigs... whatever a jig is.
David: (trying not to grin too noticeably) If you'll follow me sir, I'll show you what we have.
Curious, I casually followed behind them. They didn't see me, but David knew I was there, and I wanted to see what the guy would choose.
David: As you can see, we have a few different brands here, and I can show you the differences with each if you like. But as far as hard drives go, you get what you pay for (something he was trained to say, lol).
Man: Wait a minute. How big are these things?
David: Everything from here (he pointed) to here (he pointed again) is large enough for what you want.
Man: No, it's too big! These boxes are large... are the parts large too?
David: (confused) A hard drive will be about yay big (he formed a rectangle with his fingers, then another to show the other dimension).
Man: I don't want one of those. Don't you have any new ones? My computer's only this thick (he put his index and thumb about an inch apart).
David: Oh, you have a laptop?
Man: No... It's just a regular computer. But it's not so old that it needs a monster thing like that!
David: I'm confused (thinking that the customer was probably the confused one). Do you think we have any computers that are similar in size to yours?
Man: Oh yeah! I saw them on my way in. Here, I'll show you. (he led David over to the computers, and pointed at a large, flat panel monitor)
Man: That's what my computer looks like. Now can you see? you'll never find a place to put that thing in here. All you have are these little plugs down here, see? (he pointed to a USB port)
David: (understanding, and trying his best not to laugh) Sir, that's a monitor. These are computers (he motions toward the towers on the lower shelves).
Man: Now don't try to sell me something I don't want. I know what a computer is, for cripes' sake. Just sell me what I want.
David: What you want is a new hard drive for a PC, not a Laptop, right?
Man: Yeah.
David: Then we were in the right place earlier. These are what you want. (he took the man back to the hard drives and pointed to the same ones they'd been looking at)
Man: You don't know much about this, do you?
David: Sir, it's my job to know all about the computers we sell, and the parts we sell for them. On top of that, I've built my own computers, not to mention computers for my friends and family. I'm qualified, and I'd never try to sell you something I didn't think you need.
Man: Well, I'm not trying to insult you, but you really don't know half as much as you think you do.
I could see David beginning to turn red in the face, and I watched, entranced, to see what he'd do next.
Man: A computer is a device that shows you a bunch of stuff, like text and pictures. It takes input from my keyboard and mouse. Now how do you expect a big chunk of metal like THAT to fit in my computer? I told you what it looks like. Now take me to your more up-to-date hard drives so I can get one and get out of here. I'm not interested in clearing out your old stock.
David: (completely red now) I... You... Fine. I'll admit; I'm beaten. I'm going to go get my supervisor. He knows more about computers than even I do. If anyone here can help you find what you want, he can.
Man: All right then. That'll be fine. And don't be so hard on yourself, son. You young guys will learn your stuff eventually. Even us old guys make mistakes... sometimes.
David looked like he was about to say something, but he just smiled, nodded his head, and took off to tell his supervisor about his ordeal, and sic the customer on HIM instead. I shot him a smile as he left, but he avoided me, because he knew he'd lose it and die laughing if he looked at me.
While he was gone, I walked into view and casually pretended to look at the hard drives.
Man: Did you hear any of that garbage? That kid actually thought he could sell me these antiques!
Me: Antiques? I LOVE old computer equipment! Where?
Man: Right here! Look at the size of these things! Now where do you think you can fit these into a new computer?
I looked at them, then looked at the man. I smiled and shook my head.
Me: You haven't been a computer owner for long, have you, sir?
Man: (stiffening) What do you mean?
Me: These ARE up to date. Unless you have a laptop, you'll have no problem fitting these things into a computer.
Man: Another one! Look sweetie, these are computers here. (He took ME around and showed me the monitors. I watched politely as he pointed at them and grinned like he was teaching me something important).
Man: See? See all the pretty colors and pictures? That's a computer.
Me: That's odd. I have one of those at home, but it's not my computer. It's a peripheral called a monitor. It hooks INTO my computer, and gets its information from it. (I pointed to one of the towers.) Do you have one of these things too?
Man: (confused, and suddenly unsure of himself). Yeah, now that you mention it, I do. But I only use that to put in CDs. It's not a CD-reader?
Me: (I laughed, but not in a mean way). Yeah, it can read CDs, of course. But it does everything else a computer does, because it IS the computer. When was the last time you saw a CD player this size? We've had diskman and boomboxes for how long now?
Man: I think I may have been wrong... I don't even know what I need now!
Me: I wouldn't worry about it. Just do what I did, when I needed a new hard drive for my computer. Get a family member or friend to put it in for you, and pick it out for you. I have a brother who's great with that stuff. He built his own computers, and mine too. He works here, but I haven't been able to find him yet. His name's David.
Man: I... I haven't seen him yet. If I do, I'll ask him for help.
Me: Okay! Good luck with your search! Hope you find what you need!
I left him then, and HE was the one red in the face.
"Men don't grow up; they just grow out."
