Cool stories, bro.

from what ive heard, I think all McDonalds should have a very low powered aursoft gun of some sort, possibly one of those mini electric ones that take 4 AA batterys, and whenever a customer starts swearing, grab it and unload on the person, and run them outta the store, could make for some very funny security cam videos!

It's so sad to see that this thread, after years of service, has just about died out. I can only hope that NemoX starts posting again... :(

At 4/22/09 02:22 AM, TechnoGoomba wrote: It's so sad to see that this thread, after years of service, has just about died out. I can only hope that NemoX starts posting again... :(

Granted, he can't now that he's in China, but still...

At 4/22/09 02:25 AM, TechnoGoomba wrote:

At 4/22/09 02:22 AM, TechnoGoomba wrote: It's so sad to see that this thread, after years of service, has just about died out. I can only hope that NemoX starts posting again... :(

Granted, he can't now that he's in China, but still...

wait what? o_O

when did I say I went to China?
I've just been really really busy, I know, I feel bad I have left you guys hanging for a while, it's just school is first ad this last semester was brutal (I take electronics engineering)

I am very much alive, and still have this topic in mind I just havent had the time, that's all.

I just recently got a job at mcdonalds. I spent about 6 hours watching videos and reading a lot of papers in the back room of the place for a couple days. Everyone that works there doesn't speak good english, even the manager. Hope I dont have to deal with some of the crazy shit i read on here recently. Though my previous job had a lot of stupid shit that happened.

Apparently, my real first day of working will be in a few days and they're going to test the shit i learned from the videos and reading, and I don't remember a whole lot. Also, do you think it would be easy to work high? I could see myself getting really bored of this job...

It's gonna take me awhile to read through these, but it's worth it. These are funny!

I'm loving all these stories! Some customers really are assholes.

I work in a pub/restaurant in the summer in my village (it's 8 mins walk so it's an ideal location!). The amount of stories I could tell! So I'll share a few with you guys:

It's a pub!
Now in most pub/restaurant (please note there's a difference between a pub that serves food and a gastropub) places, you'll get the occasional customer who fails to realise that you're pirmarily there for the drink, and maybe some fish and chips or a burger if you get hungry or fancy some lunch.
Where I work, there's a table with all the cutlery and condiments, for you to get yourself. I (or whoever's working) bring the food out to you when it's ready. Obviously if I'm serving drinks when the bar gets busy, I can't be your waiter.
One time, there was this guy who looked like he'd got in from a long day at the office. He ordered a BBQ melt and asked if it was ok if he could eat at the bar. I told him that it was no toruble. When it was ready, I put it in front of him and said 'enjoy your meal!' as I always do. At that point, the bar was getting real busy so I started pouring drinks for people. The guy stares at his plate and goes "Where's my cutlery?" I tell him that it's on the table right next to the bar and to help himself. He walks over and comes back. Still he sits and looks at his food. Then he says "I need another napkin." I'm still serving other people and so I say "They're all on the table, help yourself." He slams his cutlery down on the bar and shouts "FINE, I'LL GET IT MYSELF."

Ass.

It's a pub! ~ Part 2

We get the occasional customer who orders a drink we don't serve very often. Now I work in a village pub, where basically people either have a beer, ale or a glass of wine if they're a girl. Sometimes a coke if they have their kids with them. Being a village pub, the core patron being the builder or scaffolder type, we don't have a coffee machine like a few upmarket places do. So if someone wants tea or coffee, I have to go into the kitchen and boil the kettle.
Only once have I had a complaint about the coffee (and I've worked there for a year). A woman came in and asked for a bailey's coffee (she'd just sat and had lunch, no problems at all when I asked how everything was). I told her that the only coffee we had is instant, so I'd be happy to make one for her, but it might not be very good. She got annoyed and said "Well you shouldn't have liquor coffee on your menu if you can't serve it properly."

The change trick

Not really a trick, but it's quite fun to fuck with the regulars every now and then. One of my favourite things to do is when someone asks for change, they'll almost always give you a £10 note and say "Can I have a five and five ones?" (ie 5 x £1 coins, and a five pound note)
Whenever someone asks this, I take their money, give them five pennies and a 5 pence coin. Then they look like a tit when they walk off and suddenly realise I've ripped them off. I did it to a bloke who's since been barred for life and he threw them at me. He wasn't barred for that, that's a story for another time!

That's all for now, I have an essay to be getting on with. :)

I basically love this thread, so many great stories. I have read all over your updates, Nemo, and read about 90% of all the other stories through out all 28 pages. This thread is like, my favorite on NG. Keep it going :)

I went to McDonald's a second time (another one) and I only got six hours a week. Then they cut that, and said I had to call in to see if they needed to. Two weeks in a row I called and didn't get any response. I still never officially quit, although I really should now.

Glad to find this post back. I called McDonald's and have now officially resigned. Yeah.

Huh. I guess it was some other guy whose thread I've been following who went to china. Oh well. Glad to see you're back!

Well I may be just a busboy at a BBQ joint in Chapel Hill, NC, but I tell ya, when we get busy, the line gos from the register out of the dining room which is sectioned. We even have a little "boxed" foyer and people will stand in line and wait outside too. What I want to know is why the hell won't people give my co-worker and I room to through the kitchen past the counter and into the dining room and back with a buspan full of dishes? We're lugging around some pretty big tables to boot.

Not only that, why the hell do people INSIST ON CALLING DURING THE DAY AND ASKING WHAT TIME WE CLOSE AND THEN POSSIBLY CALL BACK AT CLOSING?!

We open at 10 Tuesday-Sat Close at 5 on Tues. and Wed. We close at 8 the rest of the week. In addition to that, why do people seem to insist on coming in at 5 till 8 and then after getting their food and are done eating (possibly having eaten dessert) and staying till like 8:45. WTF?!

I met some cool kids in a McDonalds after a Symphony X concert once. Hadn't have many interesting experiences with stupid staff/stupid customers though.

I've got Sonic stories:
So my buddy (we'll call Nathan) get Sonic coupons for a free burger, etc, and we stop by Sonic on the way home from baseball practice. There's four of us, two of them having a coupon. The other coupon guy (Cody), is debating whether or not to combo that shit. Me and the other guy are just getting drinks. We've all decided on the order (the button hasn't been pressed yet), except for Cody. Nathan gets so pissed and impatient, he literally yells "JUST HURRY THE FUCK UP AND FUCKING ORDER SOMETHING!". Of course, the windows are down, and a server was delivering an order from 2 cars down. She stared right at Nate, and he apologized, got red-faced, and turned away.

This time, substitute Cody for Scott. Nathan pulls up and presses the button like 5 seconds from when we pull in. Just drinks this time, because we don't have any coupons. Nathan figured since he knew what he wanted, we did too. Well he was wrong. Scott's contemplating Limeaids, I, slushies. Nathan is impatient and raises his voice slightly "Hurry up guys".
"Hold on, I'm not sure" replies Scott. "You shouldn't have started so early" I said. (This whole time, we keep the girl waiting for us, most likely she can hear us).
"Well just pick SOMETHING!" - Nathan
"D'You know how many fuckin' drinks they have here?" - Me
"I don't care, just order!" - Nate "Shh! I'm thinkin'" - Scott
"OMG GUYS HOW HARD IS IT TO ORDER SOME DRINKS!" Scott and Nathan proceed to have an argument (nothing special) about beverage selecting, and the many trials it takes to pick one (or how easy it is in Nate's case). Just for the hell of it, I scream "AAAAAAA!"
The chick taking our order snaps "Ok, I can't hear you over the noise, why don't you just start over."
Nathan apologized, whilst Scott and I magically know what we want to drink, and order in 5 seconds.

I know, I know, these stories suck.

I just started reading these stories again after a year, I can't belive that I forgot about this thread!

Damn NemoX, I wish that you worked at one of my local fast-food joints. Just so I could stop by every so often and hear one of your awesome stories!

And maybe get a discount :P

Well, i return to this topic after i quit my job at a pizzaria a year ago and joined the McDonalds war machine, i've been there for 10 months now, pretty good, lots of friendly people.

Well i have the common stories of the idiots with their cheeseburgers with no cheese and stupid stuff like that, nothing really bad in the way of stupid people has happened to me, but i work in the back area so it's not like i talk to the customers anyway.
I can say that alot of my co-workers like working with me because i'm a hard worker =D.

Although there have beens times where i wanted to just quit, like working in the back area on New Years Eve, alone, or just any other of the 20 times i've had to work alone, but s'goood.

My proudest achievement is working a 24 hour shift (with 3, half hour breaks), i worked the overnight because i couldn't be fucked walking home, so i just clocked off (sign off thing which you do when you start or end a shift) so i just kept working since i had a morning shift. (I worked from 4pm-11pm on a Saturday, then didn't get paid from 11pm-8am, then started my 8 am to 4 pm shift) and no i didn't just bludge the whole time.

My hobbies at work (while on break) now include drinking large cups of pickle juice, having more sauce in my burgers than there are other ingredients and eating random shit, like day old cheese (I nearly threw up swallowing it, but hey, fun times)

Now i do plan to post more relevant shit in here when it occurs, but till then i thought it wouldn't be such a big deal writing this up and posting it here.

I am so glad I don't work at a fast food place. I have been working at a gas station for a year now.

When my old boss still worked there, the gas station doubled as a bottle depot. Now my old boss, who is a lot like Janice from Wanted, was too stupid to have people have assigned jobs, and just have everybody working everything, which got hectic, especially when there were people in the bottle depot, people getting gas, (it's a full-serve place by the way) people buying stuff in the store, and people wanting propane. So instead of always having someone available for each job that needed doing, everybody was running around trying to get shit done. My old boss also had about 1 or 2 people that could work the till and/or propane on shift at a time.

When I worked at the bottle depot, it wasn't a place where the person working does all the sorting and counting in his head and gets done really fast. Because there were no assigned jobs, the people in the bottle depot often had to go help elsewhere, with co-workers replacing them and the customers helping with the sorting process, leading to a really slow process. There were plenty of other places about 10 minutes away that could get $30 of bottles sorted in a minute, but people insisted on coming to my workplace and complaining about the poor service, and how the others places were so much better. (Then go there asshole!)
There was one guy who was really impatient and he had a shit load of bottles. When I told him what he could do to help and speed the process up, he got pissed off and practically yelled at me "Do you make all your customers do this?" as there were other customers in the bottle depot, helping sort their bottles. When I asked one of my co-workers if he could go help another waiting customer the asshole I was helping freaked. "Finish serving me before helping somebody else!" As calmly as I could, I told him that I was working as fast as I could. The guy got even angrier. "I can tell. If you were any faster, you'd be fucking dangerous!!" I just looked at him, and told him that he wasn't the only customer we had. Luckily he shut up, because if he had said one more word I would have gotten my supervisor, and she probably would have kicked him out.

Also, I have had the best supervisors ever. Sundays used to be an extremely slow day, because the bottle depot was closed, and the night shift was great because all there was to do on Sundays was clean, and the morning staff cleaned everything. One Sunday, my supervisor let my co-worker sneak his Wii into work and we just played Wii Sports all day.

Also the co-worker that brought his Wii, is now my supervisor. We are both confounded by the fact that this kid, who is about a year older that me, was given a key to the building. He has actually built deadly weapons out of the things that are at the store, including a dart gun, and a shruiken. He actually knows how to build a bomb out of the things there.

Also, about a month ago, I had a big black guy come to buy gas. He had a thick accent, and he asked me if there was a KFC in town. I almost shit a brick.

My aunt once told me that they put crisco in the icecream so that it wont melt.

God, fast food icecream is so disgusting.

I work in a spar garage (basically a shop keeping the essentials, plus petrol) and we get some absolute headers in here, and I would like to share a story. Mostly about crazy people:

Old hag

The most notorious customer we ever had was an old lady called Mary. She was senile, and I mean in serious terms. However she had a bastard son who didn't want to pay to much for a care workers. So she had a careworker, but not one who would work all day, or follow her out of the house.

This made problems for us. She was a hardcore smoker, and I mean hardcore. She came up and bought 20 silk cut purple a day. Firstly, she ignored the fucking que, she just walked up to you and demanded them. But because she was so awkward, we usually would just serve her to get her to fuck off.

Second, she was an impatient bitch, if you didnt get them for her, take her money and serve her inside five seconds, she went insane and screamed "i give up on this place". Whats worse is that after you served her, she would go around the store and try and shop lift. Eventually the manager brought in a rule she had to be followed round the store, then banned her completely.

However, being her awkward self, she kept trying to come in, so the manager told us to use force to keep her out. Only the supervisors took it seriously though. Anyway, our manager was a big lady called Lisa, and one day they had a scrum before Mary took of. She then went into the John Dory's (fish and chip shop accross the street) and ordered a big fish. She came back, and started whacking our manager around the head with it. Needless to say, she was out on her hole pretty quickly.

She aint been in in quite a while, thank fuck, and my supervisor told me she had died not to long ago. Really its her dickhead son though, he didnt give a fuck she was stealing or giving hassle.

Christmas Eve

Last Christmas eve I was working to twelve, which I didnt mind, as it was time and a half pay. However, the manager phones and says she made a mistake, and we close at eleven. The supervisor (a good friend of mine) was pissed, because it meant he lost an our of paperwork and had to try to get everything done quickly, meaning we were gonna be in late anyway!

He asked if I would stay past eleven (when I was meant to go) to help him get all the stuff done, and being his pal I agreed. Now, at eleven we took our tills of, locked up and shut everything down. At eleven thirty we were about to go when a notoriously retarded middle aged woman shown up banging on the shutter.

I got asked to go see what she wanted, so I did! Turns out, her brothers son was coming round for Christmas, and she wanted to buy him some chocolates. I told her I was sorry, but we'd took our tills off and couldnt sell, not to mention closed everything up.

She then went mad, saying she was a regular customer and how horrible we were treating her, demanding we put a till back on and serve her. Yeah right, that would take ten minutes at least. Eventually the supervisor came down (at her insistence) and told her the same thing I did. She complained some more and as she was leaving i sarcastically said 'MERRY CHRISTMAS'. she got pissed off and left. She's been in a few times, and each time been an annoying bitch.

No to long ago, a guy came in and asked to buy some Apple Skoal (It's chew). He was wearing a cowboy hat, jeans, big-ass belt buckle, a big white Yosemite Sam mustache, and had a heavy Texas accent. After he left I laughed my ass off.

Bump because this topic is win.

I gave up on this thread a long time ago.

I didn't work there, but my brother used to work at our local K-mart before it closed down. For the first weeks he worked it was normal (He worked stock) checking, unloading, and storing boxes. Well he went into the back of the storage room on time to get a box full of cereal; he found that it was opened and half empty. So he asked around and no one knew of what happened and he let it go... Every week one of the boxes was opened and crudely put into place. Well the store manager opened a small investigation, and found out there was a 17-year old, who was kicked out of his home and was hiding in the rafters of the store room and weekly stole from it for food.

Haha, this thread has now made me never to get a job at McDonalds.

Im thinking about working the grill at McD's soon

I worked in a reastuarant a couple of years ago, but never in a fast food restuarant (and I hope to god i never have to.) The DT stuff was the best story.

So I was at a Dennys a few nights ago when an old black bum came in asking people for food. He eventually went out when everyone got annoyed, and they called the cops. Soon later, about 5 cop cars and 7 officers came to the Dennys. AFTER 1 BLACK BUM! I call racism.

At 3/13/10 01:02 PM, lolwtfmudkips wrote: All the awesome times this thread has brought up.

and lets restart

This thread is good enough to deserve a bump.