Just sliding in -- is it fine to start casting for the characters that appears in ACT 1?
I should help @RebekahAmberClark and the rest of the voice actors to get working with the Voice Acting thread.

At 1/10/18 07:53 PM, jessieyun0404 wrote: Just sliding in -- is it fine to start casting for the characters that appears in ACT 1?
I should help @RebekahAmberClark and the rest of the voice actors to get working with the Voice Acting thread.

I'll post a finished version of ACT I this saturday Januari 13th, so perhaps you'd better wait for that. All of the major characters will definitely be in there like Darnell, ArchetypeZ8, A-Bot, Pico. Nene the CorpoCat and the Dreamcrusher. There are a couple of minor characters that I feel unsure about and I will probably remove because they make the script too long and confusing, slow down the story and are references to things that aren't related to Newgrounds itself but to other media like films.

At 1/10/18 07:53 PM, jessieyun0404 wrote: Just sliding in -- is it fine to start casting for the characters that appears in ACT 1?
I should help @RebekahAmberClark and the rest of the voice actors to get working with the Voice Acting thread.

I'm terribly sorry -- a couple months ago my mom had a stroke (she's recovered) and I pulled out of the project. I just realized I forgot to announce that publicly, though I sent PMs to the other director-type people.

Thank you, both @SourJovis and @rebekahamberclark.
@rebekahamberclark I'm sorry to hear that. Glad she's recovered.

At 1/10/18 11:15 PM, rebekahamberclark wrote:

At 1/10/18 07:53 PM, jessieyun0404 wrote: Just sliding in -- is it fine to start casting for the characters that appears in ACT 1?
I should help @RebekahAmberClark and the rest of the voice actors to get working with the Voice Acting thread.

I'm terribly sorry -- a couple months ago my mom had a stroke (she's recovered) and I pulled out of the project. I just realized I forgot to announce that publicly, though I sent PMs to the other director-type people.

ACT 1 main characters ready to cast:

Dreamcrusher
Corpocat
Darnell
ArchetypeZ8
Pico
Nene
A-Bot

Supporting Characters (pending final approval of inclusion)

Pico's Grandma
Rtil
Teacher
Radio Host

Also: Minor update

So in case you guys haven't been following, I'm focusing on making everyone's contributions coherent within the greater story. As a whole, the story is a mess. There's a lot of inconsistencies that needs quick reckoning like who the enemies are, at what point everyone's in in their character. To be expected since we all worked in isolation. Where it's appropriate I'm basically just cutting and pasting the lines of dialogue, then reworking them into a new framework. There are some really cool moments in pretty much everyone's work.
Whoever wrote the train scene: Awesome. I took it and built it out to be the first half set piece. It ends with A-Bot exploding, ArchetypeZ8 being kidnapped, and a whole, new, even more insane part of the story opening up that has room with all these fantastical military and zombie scenes. This is going to be crazy.

By the way, who ever does the sound for this is a champion. I will buy your next 20 beers or whatever you consume.

Contradictory to what I said earlier, I won't be able to finish act I on January 13th, because I've got too many other things planned as well. I will finish it and upload it on January 15th. The other dates still stand.

I've been reading both @EKublai's Audio list and the draft. There's a few questions I'd like to ask/notes I'd like to make:

Scene 1:
- leading into a Montage of famous sounds that are identifiably from Newgrounds including Club-A-Seal and Assassin.

I just wanted to mention the Assassin's theme will be problematic as it is copyrighted. Same goes with the original Pico's School theme so let's get this straight: We don't sample these loops (I don't think Club a Seal is necessarily troublesome but I'll have to make sure). This part of the script is pretty well written and I have a clear idea of what it may sound like, except for the music. I'm not sure if the script means both Club A Seal and Assassin themes play separately and out of sync at the same time, or whether it should be a mashup of Assassin and Club A Seal. I prefer the latter in this case but I need opinions.

Scene 2:
Pico's School Theme

Pico's School theme should probably be a cover of RealFaction's version?

Scene 6-11: TBD

I do not know what "Scene 6-11: TBD" means. "To be done" maybe?

Scene 13:
- a sick beat from Newgrounds. It also needs a cut off sound effect (try not to do a record scratch).

I'm wondering if a tapestop would be okay? If you don't know what tapestop is, here's an example.

Scene 14:
- Music being composed.

Scene 14 starts off with "Smooth house beats say 'home sweet home' in this abode of creative invention." Do you mean litterally? Also does that mean he's got music playing or is he composing something? It's a little confusing. Later on "Darnell stops the beat that's going in the background." Is that the same song still? Are they listening on both headphones and monitors?

Scene 20:
- Two characters gently settle on the side of a grassy hill.
- slow steps towards each other.

I'm fairly certain Draft 3 had romantic musical themes going on during Scene 20 and I was hoping this could be a recurring theme. Sadly it's not here anymore (It would have made a nice throwback later on in the elevator scene as an 80's love song plays in the background).

So far I do find ACT I misses a few opportunities to have cinematic music playing. Corpocrat's introduction for example, or the view over Philadelphia in ruin. Draft 3 also came with montage music, several radio themes and extra songs written by Darnell and AZ8. Overall I think ACT I of Draft 3 was more diverse in the music department. Please keep this in mind as you guys complete the script.

At 1/10/18 01:03 PM, Troisnyx wrote: Also, attention @VicariousE @Whirlguy. If you know anyone else involved in sound design and effects for this project, please let everyone else know. I'm not on my PC but I'll send PMs out later when I can.

The only people I can possibly think of are @zstriefel and @rig (is he still active on here?), I honestly don't know too many people in the sound design department. Anyway, I'm thinking of doing a few sound effects here and there myself. I don't think I can offer a broad array of noise but I'll try my best and join that list regardless.

Here's the fifth draft of the script.

I didn't finish the complete act I like I was supposed to. I did spend lots of hours on it though and I'm quite in the flow right now. I will finish ACT I before I start on anything else, because ACT I still needs work and it's important that act is finished first.

Here's the list of sound effects EKublai made, with the changes I made in ACT I

Scene 1: - Wartime Sounds through time.
- The declaration of Independence being read.
- General sounds of violence throughout American history in a montage.
- leading into a Montage of famous sounds that are identifiably from Newgrounds including Club-A-Seal and Assassin.
- War drums/army marching
Sound effects: - Tinnitus ringing.
Scene 2: - More Newgrounds ambience.
- Pico's School Theme
Sound effects: machine gun fire.
Scene 3: -Opening song along the lines of “Bonjour” from Beauty and the Beast, but instead it's about Glenside Philladelphia, how it's such a boring place. It's sung from the perspective of Darnell, Pico and Nene who are cuasing mayham as they zoom through the town on their skateboards, and the civilians don't sing “Bonjour!” but “Fuck you!”. Priscilla already wrote lyrics for this song. It's in the third draft if you need inspiration.
Sound effects: -Rolling skateboards as Pico, Darnell and Nene zoom through the city, and whatever sound effects match the song. (the music department will write the song, so I don't know what's going on in there)
-The CorpoCat's mechanical eyes focussing on Pico, Darnell and Nene.
-A mechanical walkie-talkie hiss as the CorpoCat contacts his master the Dreamcrusher.
-The Dreamcrusher's voice is deformed like it's coming through a walkie-talkie or phone.
Scene 4: Sound effects: -Darnell lights a match
-The trash can lights up in a blaze
-the trash can falls over and the burning screaming CorpoCat comes out.
-Darnell throws a polyester blanket over the burning corpocat which immediately catches fire.
-the fire dies out.
-The CorpoCat comes back to life mechanically. His voice now sounds more mechenical.
-The CorpoCat darts off.
Scene 5: -Upbeat techno music inside a gym, heard from outside.
-The CorpoCat launches himself at Alphonse Schwanzelecker.
-The CorpoCat assimilates Alphonse Schwanzelecker.
Scene 6-11: TBD
Scene 12 ambience: - A school bell rings and school kids chatter animatedly.
General discussions such as nerds talking about upcoming tests and classes they have together, girls talking about boys, jocks' sneakers squeak as they chase each other around.
Sound Effects: Lockers open and slam. Sneakers squeak.
- Robot hydraulics of A-Bot walking around.
- Robot bleep bloops
Scene 13:
- Trash canny banging on hollow robot body.
- ambient children whispering hushed. Then they get more excited and busy.
- a sick beat from Newgrounds. It also needs a cut off sound effect (try not to do a record scratch).
- Pencil scratching of writing.
- Darnell walking along the classroom floor
- chewing gum, blowing bubbles, bubble popping, teeth smacking.
- paper shuffling, handing it over,
- A-Bot stomping
- bleeps and bloops
- The Gum becomes a blob monster so we need blob monster sounds.
- A-Bot music.
- RTIL starts being eaten by his own piece of gum.
- Blob monster eats a character. Satisfied.
Scene 14:
- Music being composed.
- typing, clicking, general computers sounds.
- Audio equipment being moved around, tested out.
- chair rolling around a room.
- Computer alert: Music file review!
- Amp sparks and whirs
- A-Bot upsetting laugh
- Phaser sound
- More A-Bot walking
- She inserts a usb stick into the laptop, it copies and dings! She takes it out.
- Lots of chair rolling in this scene by ArchetypeZ8 and Darnell.
- Darnell directs A-Bot to freeze and A-Bot's voice phases out abruptly.
Scene 15:
- some mic tapping/swinging effect as the host pulls Darnell to the side.
- Darnell takes up his headset and puts it on the interview table.
- Door opens and shuts as Darnell lets himself out
- Scene 16 Transition: Purple Penis Eater song to radio cutting in and out.
Scene 16: - Radio turns off.
- Dreamcrusher movement sound effects (steam punky robot, lot of steel clasps, wire rubbing against eachother like a zipline sound). Different than A-Bot)
- Call button. These effect can be hard to find. I have some if needed.
Scene 17:
- Pots and Pans. Lots of clanging. Dropping, spilling pasta.
- Egg timer going off.
- landline phone ringing
- scene transition: old skateboard sounds
Scene 18:
- Skateboarding on various street surfaces, asphalt cement, dirt.
- Train crossing signal
- Honking cars
- Train horn and it wooshes by.
- A car brakes hard and honks.
- car door opens. Drivers steps out.
- Car zooming away.
- Bicycle bell greeting.
- More honking.
- Bicycle accelerating.
Scene 19
- yet more honking. Busy traffic.
- Emergency radio fanfare.
Scene 20:
- Chirping birds.
- Slow peddling uphill with skateboard in tow
- bike bell
- grassy footsteps
- Two characters gently settle on the side of a grassy hill.
- slow steps towards each other.
Scene 21:
- Cats (like dozens) meowing outside a house.
- A-Bot plays a Newgrounds game to drown them out.
- Knock on the door.
Scene 22:
- Cat and lion roars.
- Fight scene scuffling. Robot vs cats and humanoid.
- A-Bot, defeated, crashes to the ground.
Scene 23:
- A wind
- sizzle of heat?
- Seismic tremors. Small rocks shake.
- squeaking of ArchetypeZ8's bike.
Scene 24:
- braking hard on bike
- EXPLOSION! It's the outside of an explosion so mostly just wind and the environment being blown away, not a huge boom.
- Stuff flying through the air in the explosion and crashing to the ground.
- Tinnitus ringing
Scene 25:
- rollerblades and brakes
- steps on broken glass
- plate hits the floor and clatters
- cat screeching and running off.
Scene 26:
- general ambience of chaos of Scene 24
Car horns, dog's barking, residents are injured and crying for help. A firetruck siren. A mini-tornado.

I actually don't think it's our task as screenwriters to make such a list. All of the sounds are in the script itself after all, and the sound fx department can't make the sound fx by looking at the list alone, without reading the actual script. Besides, I think it's up to the sound department to decide what sound fx they think the audio drama needs to understand what's going on.

These are the characters to be cast so far in order of appearance:

Dreamcrusher
Newscaster (Support character)
Darnell
Pico
Nene
The CorpoCat
Alphonse Schwanzelecker (Support character. Sounds exactly like Arnold Schwarzenegger)
Buttkisser 1 (Support character. One of Alphonse's butt kissers)
Buttkisser 2 (Support character. The other butt kisser)
A-Bot
ArchetypeZ8

Supporting Characters (pending final approval of inclusion) (I don't know about them yet.)

Pico's Grandma
Rtil
Teacher
Radio Host

At 1/13/18 12:40 PM, Whirlguy wrote:

Scene 6-11: TBD

I do not know what "Scene 6-11: TBD" means. "To be done" maybe?

Maybe. In any case there's a part missing there where the CorpoCat, Darnell and A-Bot face off. There's room for a rap battle.

So far I do find ACT I misses a few opportunities to have cinematic music playing. Corpocrat's introduction for example, or the view over Philadelphia in ruin. Draft 3 also came with montage music, several radio themes and extra songs written by Darnell and AZ8. Overall I think ACT I of Draft 3 was more diverse in the music department. Please keep this in mind as you guys complete the script.

I'll look at the third draft as well to see if I'm missing stuff I liked from that draft. I'll include more songs.

Hey guys, I want to get the voice acting thread started soon but before we do, I'd like to open discussion about characters voices. Since you are the writers, I was hoping you all had particular voices in mind when you were working on the script. So far I've heard the following ideas:

-

Darnell: African-American accent, mature sounding.

Pico: A little youthful sounding.

Nene: American with slight Korean accent.

ArchetypeZ8: A British, Irish or otherwise European accent? According to the story she's "not from around here" so that option is on the table. I believe we decided against the twist of her being a guy all along. If not, maybe he takes example to Sailor Uranus?

A-Bot: Tom always pictured his voice like Blaster on Transformers.

CorpoCat: His voice could be a parody on Donald Trump. Personality-wise his loud and brash mannerisms might work out for Corpocat's character. Personally I think it might also take away a lot of Corpocat's charm (I really like this villain). Plus we'd portray Trump as a bad guy and I'm not sure how listeners/participants feel about that (let's try to unite, not divide). Anyway, Corpocat also has a cat-accent and a robotic voice, so I'm not sure if people will even pick up on the parody. Let me know what you think!

Dreamcrusher: An AI system with multiple personalities. I imagine a male version of GLaDOS that can actually walk around, although way less cute and much more evil. Perhaps for his speech intro, multiple voice actors should record the same lines and then we can alternate between these voices mid-sentence so as to "switch personality". Anyway, someone should probably take the time to make a list that contains all his personalities (we could always add more if we want).

Alphonse Schwanzelecker: Clearly an Arnold Schwarzenegger parody.

Buttkisser 1: Maybe we should ask voice actors to improvise?

Buttkisser 2: Maybe we should ask voice actors to improvise?

Newscaster: Clear, authoritative voice with good enunciation.

Also, here's a shoutout to @Troisnyx, @rebekahamberclark, @jessieyun0404 whom I'd love to hear some opinions of.

At 1/17/18 07:19 PM, Whirlguy wrote: Hey guys, I want to get the voice acting thread started soon but before we do, I'd like to open discussion about characters voices. Since you are the writers, I was hoping you all had particular voices in mind when you were working on the script. So far I've heard the following ideas:

-

Darnell: African-American accent, mature sounding.

Pico: A little youthful sounding.

Nene: American with slight Korean accent.

ArchetypeZ8: A British, Irish or otherwise European accent? According to the story she's "not from around here" so that option is on the table. I believe we decided against the twist of her being a guy all along. If not, maybe he takes example to Sailor Uranus?

A-Bot: Tom always pictured his voice like Blaster on Transformers.

CorpoCat: His voice could be a parody on Donald Trump. Personality-wise his loud and brash mannerisms might work out for Corpocat's character. Personally I think it might also take away a lot of Corpocat's charm (I really like this villain). Plus we'd portray Trump as a bad guy and I'm not sure how listeners/participants feel about that (let's try to unite, not divide). Anyway, Corpocat also has a cat-accent and a robotic voice, so I'm not sure if people will even pick up on the parody. Let me know what you think!

Dreamcrusher: An AI system with multiple personalities. I imagine a male version of GLaDOS that can actually walk around, although way less cute and much more evil. Perhaps for his speech intro, multiple voice actors should record the same lines and then we can alternate between these voices mid-sentence so as to "switch personality". Anyway, someone should probably take the time to make a list that contains all his personalities (we could always add more if we want).

Alphonse Schwanzelecker: Clearly an Arnold Schwarzenegger parody.

Buttkisser 1: Maybe we should ask voice actors to improvise?

Buttkisser 2: Maybe we should ask voice actors to improvise?

Newscaster: Clear, authoritative voice with good enunciation.

Also, here's a shoutout to @Troisnyx, @rebekahamberclark, @jessieyun0404 whom I'd love to hear some opinions of.

I agree with most of these ideas.

Darnell,s character in the script is rather immature though. Probably the most immature of the three. I don't know if that's what he's like in the other projects, but that's just what we wrote. So I think he shouldn't sound too mature.

A Donald Trump like voice for the CorpoCat would be an interesting take on the character. Not what I had in mind. I were thinking more of a Disney villain like voice, like Scar or Jaffar etc, but with maybe some slight cat-like noises. A voice like the cat in Coraline is what I had in mind https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91nfNp7MVIw

Indeed an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice for Alphonse Schwanzelecker. Though I imagined him really vain. Like a really vain Arnold Schwarzenegger? Would that work? If you make him sound too vain, he may no longer sound like Arnold Schwarzenegger so it won't be an Arnie parody anymore.

The 2 buttkissers I imagined as very energetic, but I don't care what they sound like exactly. Probably make the two of them sound distinctive enough.

On a somewhat unrelated note: I realize this is a big project, and the audio drama will be extremely lengthy. About 2 hours if we can condense the script enough. That will be a long time for the listener to sit through in one go. Especially for an internet thing, where everything tends to be short. By the looks of it, it may prove tough to finish all of this before the deadline and get the quality we aim for. I think in case we can't release it on the deadline, it wouldn't be a bad thing if we release it in several episodes, and make sure the first episode is finished on the deadline.

Also I can't upload the 6th draft on the 20th, so I will do it on the 22nd.

At 1/17/18 07:19 PM, Whirlguy wrote: Also, here's a shoutout to @Troisnyx, @rebekahamberclark, @jessieyun0404 whom I'd love to hear some opinions of.

Sorry, guess I wasn't clear -- I've pulled out of this project in all capacities and
am NOT going to be able to return to it between now and its completion.

At 1/18/18 06:28 PM, rebekahamberclark wrote:

At 1/17/18 07:19 PM, Whirlguy wrote: Also, here's a shoutout to @Troisnyx, @rebekahamberclark, @jessieyun0404 whom I'd love to hear some opinions of.

Sorry, guess I wasn't clear -- I've pulled out of this project in all capacities and
am NOT going to be able to return to it between now and its completion.

Completely understood. Sorry to see you go, Rebekah.

@SourJovis re: episodic structuring. Are you thinking something like

Ep 1: Begin - ACT I
Ep 2: ACT II - MIDPOINT
Ep 3: MIDPOINT - ACT III
Ep 4: ACT III - END
?

Because I think that could work and would let the other departments finally get their hands on it.
One thing we need to impress on the songwriters is what kind of story stuff we would need (we would have to fill in gaps later, I guess).

At 1/18/18 05:31 PM, SourJovis wrote: I agree with most of these ideas.

Darnell,s character in the script is rather immature though. Probably the most immature of the three. I don't know if that's what he's like in the other projects, but that's just what we wrote. So I think he shouldn't sound too mature.

Okay, so immature sounding then.

A Donald Trump like voice for the CorpoCat would be an interesting take on the character. Not what I had in mind. I were thinking more of a Disney villain like voice, like Scar or Jaffar etc, but with maybe some slight cat-like noises. A voice like the cat in Coraline is what I had in mind https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91nfNp7MVIw

Ooh, I like those ideas a lot better tbh, especially the Coraline one, although it's lacking that wacky feel about him. I kept imagining Corpocat's physique to be like the cats from Battleblock Theater haha. My perfect description would be the cat from Coraline with the accent of Meowth from Team Rocket.

Indeed an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice for Alphonse Schwanzelecker. Though I imagined him really vain. Like a really vain Arnold Schwarzenegger? Would that work? If you make him sound too vain, he may no longer sound like Arnold Schwarzenegger so it won't be an Arnie parody anymore.

It could work I think.

The 2 buttkissers I imagined as very energetic, but I don't care what they sound like exactly. Probably make the two of them sound distinctive enough.

Sounds good.

On a somewhat unrelated note: I realize this is a big project, and the audio drama will be extremely lengthy. About 2 hours if we can condense the script enough. That will be a long time for the listener to sit through in one go. Especially for an internet thing, where everything tends to be short. By the looks of it, it may prove tough to finish all of this before the deadline and get the quality we aim for. I think in case we can't release it on the deadline, it wouldn't be a bad thing if we release it in several episodes, and make sure the first episode is finished on the deadline.

Hmmm, that may get tricky. That would mean we'll have to work act by act; complete one act before we move to the other. This approach may slow the SFX department down a lot but we'll see how it goes. Maybe we should still focus on getting one act done before starting on the next, but move onto the next act if the last required sound effects are too time consuming to produce.

Also I can't upload the 6th draft on the 20th, so I will do it on the 22nd.

Oh nice, I'm guessing you'll upload it soon then?

At 1/18/18 06:28 PM, rebekahamberclark wrote: Sorry, guess I wasn't clear -- I've pulled out of this project in all capacities and
am NOT going to be able to return to it between now and its completion.

I see rebekahamberclark, in that case I won't bother you again. Best of wishes, I hope your mother will feel well soon!

How's it going? I've given an alert to all the musicians who signed up, telling them what you told me, @Whirlguy, and I don't know if what I'm doing is enough :(

Okay, I've received a PM regarding this project's VA portion, but I have a few questions before going forward:

1. What roles are actually available/do you still need? Are they all still on the table at this point, or have some already been filled? Since I could conceivably try out for just about any of these roles, it would be nice to be able to narrow things down.

2. Are you planning to have one role per VA, and do you currently have enough people on-board to avoid having to double up? Again, I could conceivably try out for and take on more than one role if necessary.

3. Can we get a finalized list of the vocal traits you're looking for, character-wise? Or at least an ETA on when such a thing will become available? Things still seem a bit up in the air at the moment, and I'm not about to spend precious time recording a demo reel if parameters are subject to change.

Here's my answer.

At 1/24/18 06:53 AM, ChronoNomad wrote: Okay, I've received a PM regarding this project's VA portion, but I have a few questions before going forward:

1. What roles are actually available/do you still need? Are they all still on the table at this point, or have some already been filled? Since I could conceivably try out for just about any of these roles, it would be nice to be able to narrow things down.

You can check that out in here : https://www.newgrounds.com/bbs/topic/1426265

2. Are you planning to have one role per VA, and do you currently have enough people on-board to avoid having to double up? Again, I could conceivably try out for and take on more than one role if necessary.

Yes, we'd prefer to do one person per one character, especially if it's a major one. And we are casting major characters for now.

3. Can we get a finalized list of the vocal traits you're looking for, character-wise? Or at least an ETA on when such a thing will become available? Things still seem a bit up in the air at the moment, and I'm not about to spend precious time recording a demo reel if parameters are subject to change.

I guess this is up to the scriptwriter team?

Sorry for all of the delay but here's the sixth draft.

I think scene 1 - 8 are finished (page 1-12 and a bit of 13)

I have to go over the school day and onward. I'll try to keep ACT I under 30 pages.

At 1/19/18 04:29 PM, EKublai wrote: @SourJovis re: episodic structuring. Are you thinking something like

Ep 1: Begin - ACT I
Ep 2: ACT II - MIDPOINT
Ep 3: MIDPOINT - ACT III
Ep 4: ACT III - END
?

Because I think that could work and would let the other departments finally get their hands on it.

That's exactly what I was thinking. 4 episodes. Divided just the way you mentioned. About 30 pages each. Maybe even shorter to leave some room for the songs. Each episode will be about 30 minutes long.

Alternatively we could release it as 8 episodes. In that case each episode will be about 15 minutes long and the script for the first episode is finished. It's scene 1-8.

I'll answer you other questions later tonight but I'll have to go now.

At 1/24/18 08:18 AM, jessieyun0404 wrote:

At 1/24/18 06:53 AM, ChronoNomad wrote: 3. Can we get a finalized list of the vocal traits you're looking for, character-wise? Or at least an ETA on when such a thing will become available? Things still seem a bit up in the air at the moment, and I'm not about to spend precious time recording a demo reel if parameters are subject to change.

I guess this is up to the scriptwriter team?

This is the list of characters that are definitely going to be in there:

Dreamcrusher

Newscaster

Darnell

Pico

Nene

The CorpoCat

Alphonse Schwanzelecker (Sounds exactly like Anrold Schwarzenegger)

Buttkisser 1 (Later becomes Fat-Cat 1)(one of Alphonse's buttkissers)

Buttkisser 2 (Later becomes Fat-Cat 2) (the other buttkisser)

A-Bot

ArchetypeZ8

More will follow. Maybe you can do open auditions as well for characters that have yet to be approved.

At 1/24/18 10:57 AM, SourJovis wrote: Sorry for all of the delay but here's the sixth draft.

I think scene 1 - 8 are finished (page 1-12 and a bit of 13)

I have to go over the school day and onward. I'll try to keep ACT I under 30 pages.

I was recently speaking to someone who is more experienced in producing audio drama, and he said that while results may vary he has found that the ratio of 5 pages:4 minutes is more accurate than film's 1:1 because of the dead air that gets cut.
That is to say, you can probably stand to aim more liberally at 35 pages or so.

At 1/25/18 08:56 PM, EKublai wrote:

At 1/24/18 10:57 AM, SourJovis wrote: Sorry for all of the delay but here's the sixth draft.

I think scene 1 - 8 are finished (page 1-12 and a bit of 13)

I have to go over the school day and onward. I'll try to keep ACT I under 30 pages.

I was recently speaking to someone who is more experienced in producing audio drama, and he said that while results may vary he has found that the ratio of 5 pages:4 minutes is more accurate than film's 1:1 because of the dead air that gets cut.
That is to say, you can probably stand to aim more liberally at 35 pages or so.

I suppose that's true.

Still you have to take the songs into account as well. The songs may be around 2 to 3 minutes each, and they have very little space in the script. 30 pages of script may be around 20-24 minutes, but if we use 4 to 6 songs for each episode that will add at least another 10 minutes. I think we'll have to stay under 30 pages.

At 1/26/18 09:01 AM, SourJovis wrote:

Still you have to take the songs into account as well. The songs may be around 2 to 3 minutes each, and they have very little space in the script. 30 pages of script may be around 20-24 minutes, but if we use 4 to 6 songs for each episode that will add at least another 10 minutes. I think we'll have to stay under 30 pages.

4-6 songs per episode? I hope you don't mean lyrical songs. We're not making Hamilton.

From a production stand-point, making several episodes makes sense in some ways but not others.
It would help because on one hand we can prioritise effectively, participants can see their work as it is completed which will motivate them and finally because I doubt the average internet goer has a 2 hour attention span for an audio drama.

On the other hand, people may find it easier to drop out if we don't pin them down for the whole thing in one go and production quality might not be completely consistent.

I do believe several shorter episodes would be better though.

@SourJovis

I am SUPER BUSY right now. If you have time, can you outro the episode ending? Right now we just have a first episode that leads right into the next scene. There needs to be an idea for getting out of the narrative, whether it's a song, narrator saying "next week on (WE HAVEN'T DECIDED A TITLE YET!)".

I will be returning to writing the next episode on February 12th.

How's it going @SourJovis @EKublai?

At 2/16/18 05:29 AM, Troisnyx wrote: How's it going @SourJovis @EKublai?

ALRIGHT! Back to work. There should be a clean pass of what we are calling episode 2 done in the next week. I haven’t checked in with the other departments in the past two weeks, heck I don’t even know if I’d SourJovis ended up outroing the first episode. That’ll be my first priority today.

Onward!

At 2/16/18 05:29 AM, Troisnyx wrote: How's it going @SourJovis @EKublai?

Been ill for the last week and a halve. There's a flu epidemic, so that's probably it. The first 6 day's I've been in bed. The last three days I've been back to work, but besides that I've not had the energy to do much else than eat and sleep, so I haven't been writing like I planned to. This weekend I'm quite busy but I've got some time to write, and at the beginning of next week I've got time as well. I've got scene 9-22 (page 13 to 43) finished by tuesday. That will be either episode 2 if you want 8 episodes, or the second halve of episode 1 if you want 4 episodes.

Here's the latest version of the script. The Seventh draft.

ACT I is now completed. At least good as. That's the first 39 page and a halve. Scene 1-23.

It's still a bit long though. It's 40 pages, so with all of the songs that would probably be a long episode.

Any thoughts if and where the script should be condensed?

I personally feel the second halve of the first act isn't as interesting as the first, so if possible some more of the dialogue of the second halve should be cut. Also ideas to make the second halve more interesting are welcome.

I did remove some comic relieve characters in the school scene, because they weren't relevant to the story, I thought they weren't that funny, and they made the script unnecessarily long. But maybe such scenes would be more interesting if they included actual well known NG characters and if the jokes were actually funny. Preferably it should actually contribute to the story as well. Any ideas?

There's a song mentioned that's a parody of "purple people eater", but I don't think we're allowed to do covers of copyrighted songs. I think it has to be replaced by a different song. I suppose it's up to the music department to write a song for this purpose, that will than be mentioned in the dialogue, instead of the "purple people eater" parody.

Please read this and comment on what you think.

At 5/4/18 01:22 AM, RealFaction wrote: I know it's a bit late, but after recording lines and reading, I noticed some typos and some grammatical errors in terms of proper wording and punctuation. It will need a revise, because I almost recorded some of the lines wrong but luckily I knew what was meant to be said, since some words are where they shouldn't be.

I also ad-libbed some things in my recording whoever is in charge of going over that deciding what goes in the final product. I recorded the original lines, but also a few extra here and there to bring out the character of Darnell in my eyes. @SourJovis @Whirlguy from my knowledge I don't think some of the voice actors have recorded yet, and I think there's still one role uncast, uncertain though.

I wouldn't mind looking over some of it and making corrections if you don't mind, some of what I added was for more of flow. As a writer, that's just some of my critique, I felt some of it didn't flow as well as it could in word structure, but for the most part, most of it was really well-written besides the small errors here and there. I like the story and feel it does the site's history (and characters) justice for Act 1.

I wouldn't mind revising small parts here and there to tidy it up and make it flow better, as a writer, if I was allowed to. I love writing. It wouldn't take much time really considering my issues with the script are small ones and are easy to fix, not that many.

Finding the right voice for the characters and making the lines flow smoothly was one of the hardest things to write in the script. I'm not from Philly or the U.S. for that matter, so I'm struggling what an urban philadelphian sounds like. I didn't write most of Darnell's lines myself I think, but other people did. Yes, the grammar is incorrect, and I sometimes have to read a line three times before I get what it says, but I figure that's just the way Darnell talks so I leave them like that. I think it's a good way if the voice actors really make the characters their own and if they think a character should talk slightly different from what's in the script, record their lines in that way, or have some alternate recordings the way you did.

It's indeed a bit late to change the first draft at this point, but I'm okay with it. PM me the email adres you like to use so I can add you to the list of writers for the writerduet project so you can change things. Please make a detailed list of changes you've made, so everyone who's already recorded knows exactly what they have to change. Also let me know when you're done so I can upload a new draft immediately.