Wow
Great use of language and fantastic pronunciation! The abstract illustrations was brilliant and the style of having it like a book was awesome.
Truly genius!
Reviews for "A Bid For Freedom"
great job man
take to hollywood it's promising. if curios jorge did then yours will pass with flying colors i would go see if it hit the big screen
Ground-breaking Work!
Honestly ranks up there with the best this site has to offer, and quite possibly the whole flash community. It was completely original yet representative of others' styles at the same time. The vocabulary added to the charm without being pretentious and the artwork was beautifully done. A little slow to start, as I was able to draw your point from all the descriptive fluff in the beginning with the first few frames, but the jokes, which were well spaced and presented, kept it driving. Overall, a very professional and outstanding piece.
Just a few recommendations to make. If you wanted to follow the book type of flash, do so without making the viewer turn the page. I felt the continuity was disrupted by having to turn the page myself. Having to do this, especially in the beginning seemed like a huge hassle and broke my focus. As people have mentioned, the text was hard to read in spots and could have been repositioned possibly so it was legible without having to cover up too much of the pretty artwork. Also, I feel you broke the air of the writing style between Babs and the chandler decent and on towards the end. However, these are just personal gripes.
Like I said, a beautiful and greatly presented piece. Well done!
wow very charming
lol, its like a children's book but one i would read lol. this was very well done, ive never seen anything quite like it on newgrounds. nice work.
AdamCook responds:
Hahaha, always pleased to interest people in new things. Thank you for your nice review!
I heard a fly buzz-- when I died
In spite some jank similes (i.e.as blue as dolphin tears) and volume spikes (in between characters) I adore everything about this work. The story, the art, and the voice acting where all great. I caught several allusions in the writing including Emily Dickenson, Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer, and Donkey Kong.
I hope that this will become a new collaborative standard for Newgrounds.
AdamCook responds:
Hey, there, nice commentary! Finally some criticism aimed at me rather than the technical issues I know too well about!
The "jankyness" of the similes are partly intended; it became so ridiculous trying to think of one-upping descriptive qualities for her ("a dress spun from the finest silk of 1000 spiders", for example, would have been considerably less useful) that I decided to go for complete camp instead. (I mean, surely you didn't think "shone like the centre of an Oreo" was a great romantic declaration!!! Hahahahaha!) Plus, it managed to convey something visually interesting that Nacho + Ceci picked up on and ran with gusto (notice the teardrop pattern on her dress).
I'm happy with your comment, though; it's a personal thing, writing, and we all have different views on the values it should uphold. On this work I tried to make something with heart but also with humour; I'm pleased with what I delivered and glad that in the main it worked for you.
As for the volume spikes; good call, no-one's mentioned that yet but I've had a sneaking suspicion. Some of the characters are meant to be a bit loud, but I could probably do a better mix in the studio. Cheers for a helpful critique!
The references were fairly incidental (although I am the biggest fan of video games), and though I get the Emily D reference you pointed out, I don't see this having much to do with her take on the spiritual rot that comes with death. Flies get around in all the media, you know! As a side note though, when Joey was providing some of the sound effects, he did offer me a fly buzz I'm sure was from the IHAFBWID animation (short and fantastic piece of work http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzK0mQ ER28A). It was too surreal for this... sounded very eerie.
Naturally I hope that more people start combining their talents for increased benefit: many people could deliver so much more with a good team. I also hope that we start to attract more writing, artistic, vocal, audio and programming talents of the calibre witnessed here, so that we can raise the collective standard on what constitutes a great submission.
Most importantly though, I hope we start attracting more viewers like you, who appreciate what we're trying to do and welcome us with such open arms. Thank you very much!