From the good people at creature comforts inc. we bring you, The great Sofasaurus.
A genetically modified hybrid of hundreds of animals this versatile beast will provide your living room with a truly organic touch, as well as being an utterly brilliant and practical couch (or of course sofa depending on which word you use) it incorporates many ingenious features that the non-living sofas of yesterday just could not offer!
How many times have you had to difficultly transport your new couch through a tight corridor? Well how many times has your couch had sturdy legs to walk through your house?
Bored of losing the remote control? Well the Sofasaurus's telepathic powers will make that a problem of the past!
How about losing coins down the back of the couch? what would you say if they were assimilated into the couches system and deposited into a specially designed receptacle so you can always have spare change?
Big bowl of doritoes? no problem! a flattened head will support those snacks!
And we've all been in that irritating situation where you've just sat down, only to realize you need to get up to get something, well using its telepathic mind-reading skills the Sofasaurus will fetch that object for you using its surprisingly agile tail, you need never get up for a pen again!
'But wait' we hear you ask, 'dont pets need feeding, and housetraining?'
Well not this one! The Sofasaurus can live for hundreds of years simply off lint from peoples pockets and crumbs from snacks. Using a unique secondary mouth the Sofasaurus can assimilate almost any organic substance as food. And as for housetraining? Well as it uses so little energy, the Sofasaures needs to make a deposit of dry, compressed dust about once every 4 months , on top of this, it has been trained to wait untill you are away or asleep and then quietly and discreetly eject its leavings out of a window.
So there you have it folks! the answer to all your couch/animal related searches! the Sofasaures! order yours today!
Version with notes showing what everything does, I really recommend you look at this!!!