Super!!! I love it!!!
Super!!! I love it!!!
Yeah, this concept video definitely gives off a different feeling than Episode 01. I'm glad you linked me to it.
Just want to start off by saying that, except for the Audio Portal, I'm not very active in the Newgrounds community. I know you've released a ton of animations in the past, and some of those videos seem to be part of a series. Unfortunately, I'm unfamiliar with your other work, so maybe this next statement doesn't really apply since I'm only basing it off on Gunmetal's 1st episode and this concept animation, but I definitely think your work comes out stronger when you're not tied down by having to establish a character's personality or setting up the series' story.
Because this concept starts off in the middle of an episode (That's how I see it, anyways), technically, the characters have already been established. So as a viewer, I'm not concerned about seeing any character development, and I'm not seeking any background history (Unlike how I felt during Episode 1). I simply accepted that these three were friends, fighters, and on some sort of mission. It's not as easy to just accept things on a 1st episode, however, so I can see where the struggle came in in regards to writing the script for that episode.
The dialogue worked well in here, too. Straight to the point and had no filler. I also liked how your tried to show one's personality through subtle details such as their walk. Su-Chan, for example, had this particular march as she entered the fighting room, and Ryu had a relaxed, 'hands-behind-head' manner as he approached the area. It's a minor detail, but every subtle difference really adds a lot, and subtlety is important. Nothing about the animation told me "Look at Ryu! Look at how he walks! He's cool, isn't he? Oh, and check out Su-Chan with her little march. Boy, she sure is bubbly!" And I like that you didn't tell me that. The way it is now, it's more genuine, and I've come to interpret the personality of the character, and I think having the audience come to that conclusion is better than having the story force the idea onto a viewer.
The battle was also better. Perhaps the 'lack on contrast during fight scenes' comment I made in my previous review only applied to that particular scene in Episode 1, and maybe you've never done it before, so I guess you really don't have to pay that comment any mind. I was able to see things much clearer in here. The only improvement I can suggest is that that animation can be a bit smoother (Not really an issue though since this was released this past September, and I believe the months of experience you've gained since then will show in your next piece).
And while this was mostly action, the few bits of humor in here were better received than what I found in episode 1. This is kind of in the same light as the whole 'genuine' bit I gave two paragraphs above. I appreciated the fact that when something humorous occurred, nothing was done to indicate that it was funny. Kinda hard to explain, but think of most sitcoms. Whenever something funny happens, a laugh track is played, telling the viewer, "This was funny and you should laugh." I like to give genuine laughs, and not laugh when the show tells me, too. I kinda felt like this happened in Episode 1, so some laughs were a bit forced. But in here, it was perfectly fine. When Su-Chan was missing in battle and there her outline flashed for a second, it immediately went to the next scene. I really liked that. You didn't drag it out, so the humor wasn't forced. Same goes for when Su asked Ryu if they've arrived, yet it was Su's job to keep track of their distance. This also got a chuckle out of me. It wasn't forced, it wasn't dragged. 'Laugh if you want. If not, that's fine, whatever, we're moving on.' I felt that during this piece, and it worked well.
I honestly can't decide whether I enjoyed the Concept video or Episode 1 more. I do think this Concept was well-put together, but I also like the experience of being immersed into a new world and learning about new characters, which I get from Episode 1. Perhaps one day you can combine the best from both worlds either into future episodes or a new series altogether.
At first, the whole episode skipping idea put me off a bit (and honestly, it still kinda does). I would've liked to see the show progress episode by episode... buuut I also understand why you're doing it and how difficult it would be to create an entire series without any mishaps, loss of resources, or a simple lack of motivation happening along the way. Hopefully this process works out for you and you get to practice your animation skills with different scenarios, settings, and characters. I'll be interested in seeing what comes out of all this.
P.S.: I apologize for the wall of text (again). I could've just said "This is cool" and called it a day, but I do like to be as in-depth as I can be, in hopes that I can provide some sort of help to the author. Honestly, I only write so much because I really appreciate the work you put in to this, and I think you have amazing potential. I'd kill to be able to do something like this.
I should be abe to combine these two ideas you mentioned in the coming ep24, since we'll already have established characters much like this. I'd say Ep 24 would probably end up more like this in terms of flow. I honestly don't like doing those manga-esque scenes that are basically the laugh tracks of anime. they worked for an older series I did but for this its a bit more tough since I dunno how serious I want it. I think I'll do it more with an action adventure tone so when something funny happens, its just something funny, there won't be any pauses for jokes or things or silly sound effect queues.
BTW thanks for your input, it is valued
Ok... I'm totally digging this. O: That rotation part was pretty cool ! I love the humor you bring to the table in your animations, it's pretty funny. :) This one is inspirational for sure.
I thought it was ok ...def room for improvement as far as animation, plus check ou sound...some of the background sound effect were lagging....but overall ok....plus i'm curious what program you used for this
This was pretty nice, the character designs were good, decent story, and though the action sequences were a bit shaky, I still enjoyed it. The background work in the very beginning was awesome looking, it really set the tone. Voice acting was great, had no problem with it. Though I have two critical bits of advice, and these are things I'm currently learning as well (before I throw another huge animation to Newgrounds). I think you would profit a lot off of this and make you so much better at establishing/ shooting scenes and animation overall.
You need to practice your moving holds. This moreover applies to 3D animation than 2D. While holding a frame can be perfectly fine in 2D, for a 3D cartoon it's hard, as it makes your characters seem dead. I see you did a little of that with a couple characters in the beginning, but not all. You need to keep them moving, whether it's slight eye movement or head slightly bobbing back and forth. If you look at an actual human, they are never quite still, and we all have different mannerisms. Establish these practices to make your characters unique, and develop them. This will make your animation shine I believe!
The 180 degree rule: A cinematographic rule in which the camera establishes the positions of characters with an "action line". The general rule is to shoot within that 180 degree arc, though there can be exceptions. I saw your 360 degree action scenes and thought you had too many, and needed to establish where your characters are placed.
Theres other small problems, like lack of exaggeration and combat speed, but that's not the biggest priority. Again, you have awesome skill, I just thought that these things were perhaps the most vital information, cause I want to you to go from great to amazing. Look these up on Youtube if need me. Can't wait to see more, peace
Thanks alot! I was just researching line of action and also the 180 deg rule today. I also am working on using mocap for idle animations for moving holds since its the most realistic way to do things.
I think line of action and the 180 were the biggest problems along with staging that someone else mentioned. I probably should've started with a simpler fight scene instead of a mob fight to learn some things. The other problem was keeping the action in the center too but hopefully the next thing will be a little bit better.
I'm also working on micromovements for facial animations to make the characters more believable