I haven't been here
In a while. Have I missed much?
Nah, probably not.

At 3/6/16 11:33 AM, NEOSLAYRE wrote: I haven't been here
In a while. Have I missed much?
Nah, probably not.

I will confirm this.
Only spurts of life dot this
wasteland nowadays.

Besides, O Holy
Elephly has once again
dissolved into space.

...In other news, spring
weather is finally with
us. Hallelujah.

Two Pins, One Vote

Hillary wins head,
but Bernie wins heart. And head
wins politics, friends.

Item #478

To add another
only prolongs the certain.
Four seventy-nine.

105 Fucks

This is how many
my ears give to me, you. A
surplus we will share.

Thumbs-up

Natural motions
limit its success. Finger
pistols work better.

Pre-mature

I maintain there is
an immature phase to each
age. Happy new year.

Anticipate

Emotion litters
these thirty-three pages. I
cannot choose just one:

The Fourth Place

Complete the ring like
a lock. All is as it was.
Beginning again.

[This is my 1,000th forum post].

At 1/14/16 11:10 PM, NEOSLAYRE wrote: How do you join

The writers guild of Newgrounds?

I want to. @tremax

Idk man, the president has been AWOL for some time now.

At 3/12/16 07:24 AM, Tremax wrote: Idk man, the president has been AWOL for some time now.

One more syllable
and you would've had enough
to make a haiku.

Newfound Power

Screaming into the
void takes a voice strengthened by
what the void throws back.

Distract the Enemy

Snowball fights in the
rain are sane. Just keep your eye
on the target gains.

Throw a Fit

Vice-tight grips on joy.
Laughter holds confusion still
until the storm breaks.

Eight Years, Seven Months

Too many people
Buying me too many drinks
My last Navy day

It's hard to wake up
Sweating through the night, shaking
But good to be loved

Unlocked

I just found out the
password to my roommate's phone.
I feel the power.

At 3/16/16 08:40 PM, TaintedLogic wrote: Unlocked

I just found out the
password to my roommate's phone.
I feel the power.

Temptation

Walking beyond each
Unlocked door, you may just find
Some unwanted things

At 3/17/16 06:20 AM, Krash17 wrote: Temptation

Walking beyond each
Unlocked door, you may just find
Some unwanted things

For this was why the
rooms were empty - their former
occupants are dead.

Patrick's Day St.

The road is always
green. Leprechauns for crossing
guards. Storm drains are gold.

I'm used to it

It's so easy to
miss a day, wading in thoughts
to find a haiku.

My Life on Broadway

There's no music. No
dancing. Just the constant hum
of anxiety.

The room is silent.
Loud, I ask, "Where have all the
Merrymakers gone?"

like to type and write
maybe get a message cross
lol or maybe not. : (

NRB

Suddenly, it pokes
Jeans expand against my will
Guy problems, ladies.

Twenty. Yeah, that's a
nice number. Twenty haikus.
Challenge accepted.

March
The weather won't change.
My feet are tired. The band stopped
playing. It's still March.

Har(t)s(c)h
No one knows how to
say his name. Then, it was an
oral tradition.

Wake-up Call
Who pushed the reset
button? Standing in the cold,
I'm glad I didn't.

Last Stand
These Bruins have their
hibernation in summer.
It came prompt this year.

Soon
Soon I won't carry
words in a haze, gravity
showing them my mind.

1%
I looked at the page
with the theories. Charts top-
heavy. It was close.

Fall of Trump
It could be no one
besides Trump. But he had to
shoot himself sometime.

Fire Alarm
Lift me out of a
funk like a warning sign. No.
I'm too high for this.

The Most Interesting Sports Fan in the World
I don't always watch
golf. But when I do, it's to
value other sports.

Last Night
Everything was dark.
The parking lot was empty.
The full moon lonely.

The Summit
Performance is too
stressful. Eat a pear instead.
I SAID EAT IT, MAN!

April Fool's
I've probably called
a haiku this already.
It's just once a year.

The REAL April Fool's Haiku
It's funny because
I'm named after the lake. But
you didn't think so.

Stretch it Out
The sun holds its grip
on the horizon until
the west begs for warmth.

Hilarious
Open the door. Roommate
ass-side up. Wet underwear.
"Let us finish, please!"

Howmanysyllables?
This website has saved
my life many times. I am
forever grateful.

Kepler is Doomed
Others may still find
it. But we won't know. And that's
the scariest thing.

New Jersey High School Students
It is a bad day
for them when they are confused
with college students.

Today
Today's home. He had
a tough day. It's your job to
fix it, Tomorrow.

Throw in the Towel

And the socks. And the
shirt. And the inside-out pants.
It's laundry night. Yeah.

Only Fourteen this Time
Two weeks. That's nothing.
So leave me alone in your
quest for ridicule.

The Boys are Back
If home was where the
heart is, I would be home all
the time. What a lie.

Ode to the Emoticons: Morning
Ten o'clock? But that's
disturbingly early. I'm
going back to bed.

Finals Crunch
Productivity
is a kind of invention
necessity forged.

Wake-up Juice
Seventy percent
coffee, thirty percent stress
of failing exams.

The Lull
To prepare for the
storm, watch a lot of YouTube
videos. It works.

The Parking-Lot Swap
Underground exchange.
The car pulls up. A flash of
embrace. Then, darkness.

Day One
I'm not keeping track,
but it has to be at least
day seven by now.

Monopoly
The game's name is pure
irony. Everything is
shared: laughter, drinks, fun.

Detour
If the city is
"town," then the town is nowhere.
I still won't live here.

Get back to Work
Jolt yourself out of
the break room chair. You'll only
sleep when the store does.

Passover
Something to do with
matzos, a kind of cardboard
you can't recycle.

The most cliche haiku title in the world
...is probably in
Japanese. I can't speak it,
so leave me alone.

Dark Alley
Do hobos eat rats?
I need a direct sighting
to conclude these things.

Faced with a manchild,
any attempt to help him
fizzles out like smoke.

Story of my life dealing with chlfan

I wonder what brings
about this mental illness
in people like him.

I ask because my fiancé is of the same age, suffers some of this person's conditions, and is far more mature.

Twenty-two long years
of desiring to play drums;
still no end in sight...

Used to Be

Used to be something;
My identity was forged
by occupation.

Used to live elsewhere;
In moving I found that we
can live anywhere.

Used to have a job;
I did not lose it. I gave
It away, smiling.

Used to know it all;
But the older I get, the
less is apparent.

I used to be lost;
I wandered around the Earth
'til I found a path.

Used to know the way;
Then I learned that the ways lie
in infinity.

Used to be afraid;
But I'm breathing, goddammit.
I am still breathing.

Friends Visit

When the wind is no
longer parasitic, I
will meet you in Maine.

It has been hailing
rather badly for springtime.
I'm sick of being ill.

At 4/26/16 05:17 PM, Troisnyx wrote: It has been hailing
rather badly for springtime.
I'm sick of being ill.

Meanwhile it snowed here
yesterday. I can't say I'm
ill, which is a plus.

I heard talk of new
emoticons. Supporters
and I will rejoice.

At 4/26/16 05:17 PM, Troisnyx wrote: It has been hailing
rather badly for springtime.
I'm sick of being ill.

Summer and Not Summer, or, The Two Seasons of Florida

Springtime? Short era;
Perhaps two weeks qualifies
To be called such here

I feel like I am
diving right into summer;
Fully submerged now

At 4/28/16 11:47 AM, Krash17 wrote: Summer and Not Summer, or, The Two Seasons of Florida

Springtime? Short era;
Perhaps two weeks qualifies
To be called such here

I feel like I am
diving right into summer;
Fully submerged now

And in response, the one season of Lancashire.

Rain rain rain rain rain.
Lightningstorms and thunderbolts.
And more fucking rain.

Oooo...now is is my
turn to complain about the
weather where I live?

The Jobless Wonder

Come one, come all! Watch
As he slowly turns into
a filthy hobo!

At 4/29/16 07:24 AM, Krash17 wrote: The Jobless Wonder

Come one, come all! Watch
As he slowly turns into
a filthy hobo!

Not my kind of show,
but I'm curious. Are the
tickets expensive?

Villanelle
Why be a modern
asshole when you can be an
antiquated one?