At 3/27/07 11:53 PM, Gorillazrock wrote: Well, it may be possible that she is considering breaking up with you. That's most likely what they're talking about. She's debating whether she wants to say with you, or try her luck with the other guy. Try doing something special for her.

What do you think I should do?

At 3/27/07 11:53 PM, Gorillazrock wrote: She's debating whether she wants to say with you, or try her luck with the other guy.

She told me she hates the other guy.

*bangs head into the wall.* Look Kipp DO NOT I say again DO NOT get paranoid. This will cause you more pain than you can imagine. She may just be planing a surprise for you. She could just have figured out she thinks she is in love with you and is asking the girl how to tell you. Damn dude you need to give details. Is the other girl her friend? How long have you been togeather? Have you had any fights as of late. Have things grown cold between you two? Give us a backround to work with.

Gorillazrock:

Dont be so swift to jump to the negative. Did you even think about this one before posting? I mean just because a girl does not talk to her guy for a few days does not mean trouble all the time. You need more info. Please dont take this one harshly but I am trying to correct your advice giving skills. It takes time but listen to me and you will become kick ass at this game very swiftly. Oh and yes relationships are a game people. Its just knowing how to play them that is key.

Well i'm not going to moan about how I am looking after a girl because I just broke up with one. Apparently I was giving her, her way, way too much. (see what I did there.) I guess I got so paranoid that if I would do something to offend her that she would leave me, that I practically agreed on everything she wanted to do and that back fired.

So here's a tip for you guys. Girls like it when you are a bit competitive towards them. Doesn't matter how sweet you are (and I am very fucking sweet, like beyond real sweet, like 'pay for everything bla bla bla' type sweet etc.) but if you let them do what they want to do they aren't going to be happy. Also if you don't let them do what they wanna do they won't be happy either. So you need to find a balance.

At 3/28/07 09:01 AM, Akula wrote: stuff

Akula you are right and wrong. Yes you need to find a blance but it has nothing to do with leting them do or not do what they want. Its the fact that no women wants a man she can walk all over. If you cant stand up to her what makes her think you can stand up FOR her? All women on a basic level want a provider and a protector. Its breed into them from the dawn of time. So you must stand up for what you want with out being a control freak. That is whats key

At 3/28/07 12:28 PM, TigerDemon wrote:

At 3/28/07 09:01 AM, Akula wrote: stuff

Akula you are right and wrong. Yes you need to find a blance but it has nothing to do with leting them do or not do what they want. Its the fact that no women wants a man she can walk all over. If you cant stand up to her what makes her think you can stand up FOR her? All women on a basic level want a provider and a protector. Its breed into them from the dawn of time. So you must stand up for what you want with out being a control freak. That is whats key

Well it's not like we didn't disagree on things. For instance our political views are totally different, apart from that we come from totally different backgrounds, so that was a nice mix. As far as standing up FOR her, she knows I will do that. One of the reasons she fell in love with me is because I'm a boxer. I guess that's where her sense of protection kicked in.

But heck, this was my first serious gf. So well, i'll take the experience and move on.

Btw, got any tips on coping with heartbreaks? I need to study and shit but she keeps popping into my mind, kinda sucks.

At 3/28/07 03:28 PM, Akula wrote: Well it's not like we didn't disagree on things. For instance our political views are totally different, apart from that we come from totally different backgrounds, so that was a nice mix. As far as standing up FOR her, she knows I will do that. One of the reasons she fell in love with me is because I'm a boxer. I guess that's where her sense of protection kicked in.

More what I ment is how can she respect you if you let her run the show all the time? Just a little something to keep in mind for your next relationship.

Btw, got any tips on coping with heartbreaks? I need to study and shit but she keeps popping into my mind, kinda sucks.

I know the feeling. As for tips. Well put the things that remind you of her away. Totally out of view. DO NOT listen to any music that reminds you of her. Try not to visit special places to the two of you. Also make sure your geting out and having fun. Its very important that you make sure your having fun and not thinking that she was your "one and only" because its not true. No one has a one and only, there are people you could spend the rest of your life with but guess what if you loose them you will find some one eles. That is another key thing, remember there is always some one eles. (trust me I know I was married and I am now in the middle of a divorce. So I can speak true when I say there is no one and only for people)

*Sigh* I`ve pretty much broken up with my girl friend, she gave me a note that said that she thinks we would have been better off just staying friends. It was a response to note I sent her asking her why she hasn`t been talking to me as much. The worst part about the whole thing is that before she gave me the note we were hugging and she told me she loved me before she got on the bus. When I was waiting for my ride I decided to read it. Before I even opened it I knew something was different about it, she usually puts hearts and stuff all over the outside, it was plain this time. Inside was a short little message with stuff like "I`m sorry" and whatnot and then at the bottom it said we would have been better off just being friends, she couldn`t even say it to my face. I made this weird grunting noise and and crushed then stuck it in my pocket. When I got home I felt like screaming, but I managed to keep it in. I took a shower and ,I have to admit it, cried like a baby. I`ve just been sulking around the house all evening, wondering what I`m going to say to her tommorow...It just really hurt that she did this because I`ve done all I can to be good to her and this is what I got in return..a broken heart. What should I do?

FatPanda what I suggest is asking her why she feels that way and whats going on. Then if she fails to answer or after you get the answer she does not want to work it out well... let it burn man. Just let her go and move the fuck on. No one I repeat no one is worht beating yourself up over.

Man, i can't even leave the thread for 1 day. 3 different people wanting help. Okay here goes

To KipptheCool:
I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. I think you're a little paranoid that she's planning on breaking up with you, and that came out when you discribed the situation to us. I would just wait it out. It is probably nothing, like TigerDemon said

To TigerDemon:
I did actually think the first statement through. Looking back it was wrong, but i think all of my statements through before typing them up. No need to get all high-and-mighty here, we're all equals.

To Akula:
Thanks for the advice. I usually am pretty lienient, but i have my limits. One of my friends is in a relationship where the guy lets her walk all over him. That's sort of why i think it won't work out. Another one of my friends is in the exact oposite situation (or used to be). She's the one getting all walked over. Then my roomate is in a realtionship, and they've found the perfect balence. Funny how i know one of each, huh?

To FattPandaa:
She was probably giving you the note to let you down easy. That or she didn't have the courage to tell you face-to-face.
Either way, you need to listen to TigerDemon when he says "No one has a one and only, there are people you could spend the rest of your life with but guess what if you loose them you will find some one eles." It may seem like she was great an all, but you're only 15. You still have plently of time to find someone else.

Whew, I think that's everything.

At 3/28/07 09:20 PM, TigerDemon wrote: FatPanda what I suggest is asking her why she feels that way and whats going on. Then if she fails to answer or after you get the answer she does not want to work it out well... let it burn man. Just let her go and move the fuck on. No one I repeat no one is worht beating yourself up over.

That sounds like the best thing to do. I kinda wanna try to work it out but I just don`t know. Thanks man.

Gorillazrock:
Look if I came off as harsh sorry but I am very tired as of late and I get snapy. I mean it was just that I felt you were sending the guy off in a wrong direction because you jumped the gun. So I got a little snippy. I dont mean to get this way but I do have a reputation to look after with this club. I mean we have yet to fail any one and I dont want to start. I forget that not every one has been doing this for as long as me so things that are clear to me from the get go are not the same for others. So all in all my bad.

FatPanda:
Yea try to work it out and if not fuck it man there are others out there. I know its not gonna be easy if you cant work it out but hang in there and some one better will come your way. Trust me on that one. They always do.

I figured you guys might want to know how it worked it out. Today I meet with my friends at school. I talked to them for a minute about the whole thing and they asked me what I was gonna do about the whole thing. I told I was gonna talk ot her and see if we can wrok it out or end it peacefully. I went into the library and found her and asked her if I couldtalk to her for a minute. All her friends gave me a fucked up look so I walked away and waited for her near the doors. When she walked up I said "Soo...this is it?" She gives me a fucked up look and and walks out.

I was gonna try to at least stay friends with her but after she disrespected me like that I was throught with it. My friend Jennifer went and tried to talk to her and she just walked away from her. My friend Kenny managed to talk to her, according to him she wanted to talk to me about it. I told him she had her chance to talk to me, but she disrepected me and walked off. So he spent the whole gym period trying to tell me to talk to her while jennifer kept telling me not to worry that I`ll find somebody else. *sigh*

Well, unfortunately, this sounds beyond hope. I don't think you should have said "So this is it?". It sounds confrentational, like you are annoyed at her. Both you annoyed will just end up with her walking away (like she did). I would try to talk to her again. but ask if you did anything wrong.

It shows that you're not accusing her of being the one who's in the wrong. By asking if you did something wrong, it lets her vent her feelings, and (hopefully) help you find the root of the problem.

Even though it may seem hopeless now, it may actually end up fixing itself down the road.

FatPanda I suggest trying to talk to her again in a less publis manner. She did not really disrespect you by walking away she just did not want to talk at that moment. If you try again and she does not want to talk then screw her and move on. However if you dont at least try you will always wonder what if so give it a second shot.

I agree with tigerdemon. I've been in the situation where you don't know if you should make a move or not. It'll drive you crazy untill you confront it, so you may as well talk to her now.

I kinda find this pathetic, but I really need some advice. Allright typical:" Il ike her but I dunno if she feels the same" but it's slightly different. Ok, there's this girl in my school who I like and all but the thing is I really have absolutly no clue if she likes me or not and going around telling friends to ask her feels kinda childlish for being a 15 year-old.See I've never had a girlfriend because from 1st to 8th grade all the girls were really bitchy and they were all into hot guys and by that time I ddin't give three shits.In 9th grade I happened the same problem I have now.Now in 10th I;m in a completly different school and this is where the girl comes in. I mean, I have made out,grabbed boobs etc. whatever but that was with whorish friends.Not people i'd want a realationship,also I'm not an asshole kinda guy , those things just happened at the moment so I took advantage of the moments and did those things.

ANYWAYS, So I like this girl, she doesn't seem to ever had boyfriends, and she's a really nince girl, a bit shy.I've talked to her and stuff but she never stays around long enough, plus she sits with her other friends and I woudn't wanna look like an asshole and go interupt them. She always hangs ut with two losers that trust me she doesn't like them, she just likes to hang out with them. So I know I should ask her out but I do not know where, and I don't wanna ask her out the movies cuz very little talk goes by in the movies, and I do wanna get to know her. And it's more than that, because I'm widly considered funny by my friends and she has laughed to a couple of jokes I ahve made and stuff, but those things only comes by with I'm with my other friend,it's like I can make a million jokes when e's around because were like a gameboy and a videogame but thigs is I can't make jokes without gay people around or without anything to talk to and that's where my problem kicks in, I'm afraid that there's gonna be awkard silences, and trust me I'm 87% sure there will be, so how do I fight that, give me something to talk about. I know group or a double date wold help me but I just wanna be with her, you know?

Vercetti008 what I suggest is that you talk to her when her friends are around. You dont have to interupt just go over and say hi. Once you are part of the conversation it will be easy to get her alone so you can ask her. Just as things wrap up and people get ready to leave ask her to come with you for a second because there is something you want to tell her. Then ask her. I suggest a trip to a zoo or park in your area so that you can talk and have fun. As for things to talk about well do you know what sort of stuff she is into and likes? If not find out and come back and tell me. Then also tell me some of the stuff you are into and i can help with things to talk about.

I have a problem I'm shy (in real life) and I find it hard to talk to none freands.
this is a problem becouse all my freands are male, and I hang out with and odd groop.
I just need help talking to peaple.

Vercetti008 i just have a couple of questions:
1. How long have you known her?
2. How often do you guys hang out (like how many times a week?)
3. Does she seem to be shy all the time, or just around you? (ask some friends on this one.)
4. How do you know that she's only just friends with the two guys she hangs around with?

As for the situation as a whole, i think you should think it over a little bit, and then pick the best time to ask her. Try not to do it when you're in a bad mood, or when she's in a bad mood. If she says she just wants to just be friends, try not to let the hurt show. A lot of girls who just want to be friends are interested in you, but are going out with someone else. If a girl says she just wants to be friends, and she doesn't have a boyfriend, that's usually a red flag to back off a little.

Can't really make a very powerful critque untill i have a little more info, though.

At 3/31/07 02:35 PM, Sullivan wrote: I have a problem I'm shy (in real life) and I find it hard to talk to none freands.
this is a problem becouse all my freands are male, and I hang out with and odd groop.
I just need help talking to peaple.

Well, how odd is this group? What is it that you guys do?

my freands do a lot off dorky stuff (like playing tradeing cards and are computer geeks)
and at the same time can be totaly, well im not shur what to call it (fighting, drinking, ext...)

At 3/31/07 03:37 PM, Gorillazrock wrote: Vercetti008 i just have a couple of questions:
1. How long have you known her?

Allright hats kinda of a hard question, I know her but we're not buds you know,I almost never hang with her group.I know her and sh knows me,and I have talked to her alone ,but tat was one time,and I think I did ok,but it was just a talk, I think from that point she liked me a LITLE ICKLE bit, but I'm not sure.

2. How often do you guys hang out (like how many times a week?)

Barely.

3. Does she seem to be shy all the time, or just around you? (ask some friends on this one.)

Hmm I'll have o ask a friend or ask her, I have no problem asking her.

4. How do you know that she's only just friends with the two guys she hangs around with?

Yeah she's just friends with them.Altought I think one likes her but she doesn't look at him as more of a friend( I hope because anyhing can happen in this world)

As for the situation as a whole, i think you should think it over a little bit, and then pick the best time to ask her. Try not to do it when you're in a bad mood, or when she's in a bad mood. If she says she just wants to just be friends, try not to let the hurt show. A lot of girls who just want to be friends are interested in you, but are going out with someone else. If a girl says she just wants to be friends, and she doesn't have a boyfriend, that's usually a red flag to back off a little.

Can't really make a very powerful critque untill i have a little more info, though.

Yah well I don't like making ppl feel uncomfortable,so I'd guess she'd feel a lttle uncorfortable saying that she doesn't like me in other words " just wants to be friends"
Well I know she gonna audition for drama class next year so I know she's gonna stay.Allright my school is diferent. se they wanted to start an art school so they mixed a highschool and a middle school.8 and 9th grade don' take part of the art school they just have normal class.7 and 10th are the ones in art(drama,drawing,dancing,music etc.)So she'll be auditioning, and I hope she says,that'll give me some time. I mean one of my problems is that I'm not skinny, I'm not FAT but I'm not skinny I'm kinda a little average, if not alittle bit more.See and she's skinny and pretty, she doesn't look hot, she just looks beautiful(to me).Andd there's a difference between those types of girls.She's just ok, not perfect.Man I just don't know what to do.

Ok i need some help here.

One of my friends, jessica i fancy her i think she's great me and her ar good friends and we share loads of other friends aong with us both peaple already keep saying i fancy her which i do, but i don't know what to do, ask her out? what am i meant to acctuay do about this.

At 4/4/07 11:22 AM, oddworth wrote: Ok i need some help here.

One of my friends, jessica i fancy her i think she's great me and her ar good friends and we share loads of other friends aong with us both peaple already keep saying i fancy her which i do, but i don't know what to do, ask her out? what am i meant to acctuay do about this.

More info? From the sounds of it, since you think you should go out with her and other people are thinking you should go out with her (pretty many from the sounds of it), it seems sort of obvious you are meant for each other. Please go into detail WHY you like her, and what you have in common, though.

At 4/4/07 11:25 AM, Gorillazrock wrote:

Please go into detail WHY you like her, and what you have in common, though.

Well shes funny, pretty has a great personality hates my ex-girlfriend & alot of other stuff i think shes great!

And well, we both like the same bands we like to kick-box playing video games, teling jokes and many other things, only thing is i hate emo's she likes them.

Well oddworth all I can say is if you like her ask her out. No one can tell you what you are ment to do but I can say that there seems to be nothing wrong with you two dating. So I suggest you go for it.

i like a girl but she dosent like me back oh and two of my freinds are fighting over a girl help

At 4/5/07 01:24 PM, dan00012 wrote: i like a girl but she dosent like me back oh and two of my freinds are fighting over a girl help

Is this "A girl" the same girl you're going after?

At 4/5/07 02:06 PM, Gorillazrock wrote:

At 4/5/07 01:24 PM, dan00012 wrote: i like a girl but she dosent like me back oh and two of my freinds are fighting over a girl help

Is this "A girl" the same girl you're going after?

no its actualy not