Why do men chase women?

[MatrixGravity]

Why do women hold so much power over us men? I feel like guys are always doing most of the work. We always have to approach other women first and take the initiative, and we always have to bend over backwards just so they can acknowledge us. I feel like it's such a ridiculous process. Why don't women ever bother pursuing men? I just wish it wasn't like this. I hate the fact that women just seem to hold so much control because they have 'beauty' and 'looks'. And that's what entices us...

Will we ever see the day when women start approaching other guys and doing some of the work that we struggle with?

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 09:42 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:
Will we ever see the day when women start approaching other guys and doing some of the work that we struggle with?

Going after the wrong type of women. My girl is wonderful, and her and I hold our relationship in unison.

[MatrixGravity]

At 5/12/12 09:44 PM, Insanctuary wrote:

At 5/12/12 09:42 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:
Will we ever see the day when women start approaching other guys and doing some of the work that we struggle with?

Going after the wrong type of women. My girl is wonderful, and her and I hold our relationship in unison.

That's the thing. I don't go after anybody. I am not a chaser. I don't feel the desire to try and approach other women and win their attention. That's what I mean. I feel like it's just an overall sign of weakness and I don't want to feel like a sucker who desperately wants to win the attention of other female..

[Jester]

At 5/12/12 09:44 PM, Insanctuary wrote:

At 5/12/12 09:42 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:
Will we ever see the day when women start approaching other guys and doing some of the work that we struggle with?

Going after the wrong type of women. My girl is wonderful, and her and I hold our relationship in unison.

Basically this. If you know how to come off as attractive then women will come to you.

[Knights]

Hey, that's how the animal world works. Male Peacocks flaunt their feathers in search of a mate, male penguins build rock nests to attract suitors, human males drink copius amounts of alcohol and act like tools to attract women, it's as simple as that.

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 09:46 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

That's the thing. I don't go after anybody. I am not a chaser. I don't feel the desire to try and approach other women and win their attention. That's what I mean. I feel like it's just an overall sign of weakness and I don't want to feel like a sucker who desperately wants to win the attention of other female..

That is because you both shouldn't chase after each other. You have to chase after the same thing that shares a common trait. This trait will create a tree between your and her, and both of you will take of that tree. Find something you both want. : )

I love metaphors.

[Laughingbox]

I dunno man, some girls chase after some guys too. It's all about who has the upper hand (or who wants whom).

Girls can chase you too, provided you turn on your swag or something.

[Davidson13]

It's because they have sweet souls that transcends the universe itse.... Nah, I do it for the smex.

[7794]

I does go both ways. I've had a few girls "chase" me.

It's just normal i think. If you like someone you either chase them or give up.

[MatrixGravity]

Honestly.. At this point, it has occurred to me that the only way for a girl to chase you and have any desire for you is if you're a famous celebrity or popstar. Ordinary guys like me aren't shit. I guess that's how fucked up the reality of it all is..

[MatrixGravity]

And not to mention that women will just reject a guy most of the damn time which even makes matters worse. On top of taking the initiative of approaching a girl and going up to her, you have to deal with her telling you to fuck off.

It's ridiculous isn't it? Women claim that they have always wanted to meet a genuine decent guy, somebody who will come along and sweep them off their feet, yet when somebody makes an attempt to meet them and try to get to know them, they get blown off. So how do we win? As men, what viable options do we really have at our disposal? It all seems so futile.

If a girl approached me once and tried to get to know me, I'd be fucking flattered and happy and I'd be very welcoming towards her. Yet if I tried to approach some chick, I'd probably get told to piss off or she'd just ignore me. Funny how things work huh

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 10:32 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

If a girl approached me once and tried to get to know me, I'd be fucking flattered and happy and I'd be very welcoming towards her. Yet if I tried to approach some chick, I'd probably get told to piss off or she'd just ignore me. Funny how things work huh

You generalize women for your own inability to hook up with a girl. Stop covering up your flaws and admit that you aren't really good with the ladies instead of pretending they are at fault.

[7794]

At 5/12/12 10:22 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

I guess that's how fucked up the reality of it all is..

Just being a downer.

The real fucked up thing is it's all logical. Here's a shitty metaphor. Would you want to listen to a talentless shitty band all day? No. You'd rather listen to a band you like.

[InsertFunnyUserName]

If your expectation of chasing is that they start jumping out from every alleyway to cling to you like magnets, then no, you're not going to find that. But women definitely flirt, and they will encourage a guy even if they aren't the ones to actually ask the question (and it's becoming increasingly common for them to be the ones to do the asking these days).

At 5/12/12 09:46 PM, MatrixGravity wrote: That's the thing. I don't go after anybody. I am not a chaser. I don't feel the desire to try and approach other women and win their attention. That's what I mean. I feel like it's just an overall sign of weakness and I don't want to feel like a sucker who desperately wants to win the attention of other female..

And so they will feel no desire to approach you. You most certainly will not experience any form of chasing if you don't participate in it, as you say you don't. Women don't want to be rejected, either, so they're not going to go after a guy whom they don't think will reciprocate. If you don't show your interest, they will consider you not interested because they're taking a risk, too.

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 10:39 PM, 7794 wrote: Here's a shitty metaphor. Would you want to listen to a talentless shitty band all day? No. You'd rather listen to a band you like.

Here is a metaphor: Girls want action in guys like ''gamers'' want more COD.

[Richard]

At 5/12/12 10:22 PM, MatrixGravity wrote: Honestly.. At this point, it has occurred to me that the only way for a girl to chase you and have any desire for you is if you're a famous celebrity or popstar. Ordinary guys like me aren't shit. I guess that's how fucked up the reality of it all is..

Virgin with rage detected.

[MatrixGravity]

At 5/12/12 10:36 PM, Insanctuary wrote:

At 5/12/12 10:32 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

If a girl approached me once and tried to get to know me, I'd be fucking flattered and happy and I'd be very welcoming towards her. Yet if I tried to approach some chick, I'd probably get told to piss off or she'd just ignore me. Funny how things work huh

You generalize women for your own inability to hook up with a girl. Stop covering up your flaws and admit that you aren't really good with the ladies instead of pretending they are at fault.

I am not specifically talking about myself. I am talking about men in general. Men generally face rejection the majority of the time when approaching women. But on the rare occasions that a women approaches a man, the ending result usually turns out in their favor. That's just how it seems to be. Once again, I am not talking about myself because I don't approach women. I am not a chaser, I have no intention of going after anybody. If a women shows interest in me, she can talk to me. Women place themselves on these high pedestals and expect the guys to always make the first move and go after them, but I am not going to fall trap to that shitty belief they have. If other guys want to go around chasing after women like little dogs they can go right ahead but I won't subject myself to that nonsense.

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 10:52 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

I am not specifically talking about myself. I am talking about men in general. Men generally face rejection the majority of the time when approaching women. But on the rare occasions that a women approaches a man, the ending result usually turns out in their favor. That's just how it seems to be. Once again, I am not talking about myself because I don't approach women. I am not a chaser, I have no intention of going after anybody. If a women shows interest in me, she can talk to me. Women place themselves on these high pedestals and expect the guys to always make the first move and go after them, but I am not going to fall trap to that shitty belief they have. If other guys want to go around chasing after women like little dogs they can go right ahead but I won't subject myself to that nonsense.

Then why is your general archetype consisted of a man with horrible lady skills? I've had girls whistle at me, stare with their dreamy eyes, or some other massive flirting move on me through out my life. I'm not even sure why exactly. The general consensus about girls is simple - girls are completely random. Blame how they generally grow up around TV shows that look like someone on drugs made. Blame the bright colours they are exposed to, and all of the happy go lucky influences they absorb through out life. Blame the light-hearted, the lighter names, the randomness. I think it has something to do with the fact that girls are far more metaphor savvy than men. They have more experience with their abstract ideas, and emotions, and that is kind of the reason why women make bad choices, because they let their emotions and abstract imagery obfuscate the cold reality we are in.

I'm not a chaser either. I let life unravel itself. I simply 'do' things with no agenda. My journey is endless. There is no destination for me. I've managed to find my beloved without even trying. I simply listened to myself, and my ability to fix my mistakes is what lead me to her. We always find things when we aren't looking. Life is our eyes, our eyes are only the experiencer. If that makes sense.

I just think you are generalizing men and women with a too much of a personal introspection. I disagree with how you see girls and guys, because I have seen a mix bag of situations that arises between one or the other.

[MatrixGravity]

At 5/12/12 11:12 PM, Insanctuary wrote:

At 5/12/12 10:52 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

I am not specifically talking about myself. I am talking about men in general. Men generally face rejection the majority of the time when approaching women. But on the rare occasions that a women approaches a man, the ending result usually turns out in their favor. That's just how it seems to be. Once again, I am not talking about myself because I don't approach women. I am not a chaser, I have no intention of going after anybody. If a women shows interest in me, she can talk to me. Women place themselves on these high pedestals and expect the guys to always make the first move and go after them, but I am not going to fall trap to that shitty belief they have. If other guys want to go around chasing after women like little dogs they can go right ahead but I won't subject myself to that nonsense.

Then why is your general archetype consisted of a man with horrible lady skills? I've had girls whistle at me, stare with their dreamy eyes, or some other massive flirting move on me through out my life. I'm not even sure why exactly. The general consensus about girls is simple - girls are completely random. Blame how they generally grow up around TV shows that look like someone on drugs made. Blame the bright colours they are exposed to, and all of the happy go lucky influences they absorb through out life. Blame the light-hearted, the lighter names, the randomness. I think it has something to do with the fact that girls are far more metaphor savvy than men. They have more experience with their abstract ideas, and emotions, and that is kind of the reason why women make bad choices, because they let their emotions and abstract imagery obfuscate the cold reality we are in.

I'm not a chaser either. I let life unravel itself. I simply 'do' things with no agenda. My journey is endless. There is no destination for me. I've managed to find my beloved without even trying. I simply listened to myself, and my ability to fix my mistakes is what lead me to her. We always find things when we aren't looking. Life is our eyes, our eyes are only the experiencer. If that makes sense.

I just think you are generalizing men and women with a too much of a personal introspection. I disagree with how you see girls and guys, because I have seen a mix bag of situations that arises between one or the other.

Well what can I honestly say? I've grown up with women constantly ignoring me and disregarding my mere existence. That's why I am not very fond of women in general. I have made many attempts at putting myself out there in the world and all my efforts always seem to go to waste. No matter how much time I invest on enhancing my physical appearance or refining my personality, none of that seems to matter. I don't really have many options left in my life currently. You seem fortunate enough to have found your significant other, and that's great to hear. Sadly not many people are lucky enough to find themselves with somebody they can call their own. Sure, maybe I have my own personal flaws but I don't think even perfection will be enough for me to find somebody that I can genuinely relate too and see eye to eye with.

[InsertFunnyUserName]

At 5/12/12 10:52 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

I am not specifically talking about myself. I am talking about men in general. Men generally face rejection the majority of the time when approaching women. But on the rare occasions that a women approaches a man, the ending result usually turns out in their favor.

You don't see the trend there? The few times they approach a man are the times that they're sure the man is interested. It's not a coincidence or some trick of probability. It's that they've made sure before they make their move that it has a greater chance of working out in their favor. Men reach out more indiscriminately, which leads them to doing it more often, but it also leads them to getting rejected more often.

[spanishmnm]

Not exactly, a lot of girls in high school chase the most popular guy, or the football team captain, or the toughest guy.

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 11:26 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

Well what can I honestly say? I've grown up with women constantly ignoring me and disregarding my mere existence. That's why I am not very fond of women in general. I have made many attempts at putting myself out there in the world and all my efforts always seem to go to waste. No matter how much time I invest on enhancing my physical appearance or refining my personality, none of that seems to matter. I don't really have many options left in my life currently. You seem fortunate enough to have found your significant other, and that's great to hear. Sadly not many people are lucky enough to find themselves with somebody they can call their own. Sure, maybe I have my own personal flaws but I don't think even perfection will be enough for me to find somebody that I can genuinely relate too and see eye to eye with.

Now you have a teaspoon of relation to how I feel. Instead of your concerns of the world as a whole, you have concerns for the attitudes of a general female character - based off of your own introspection - at the least. They do not see what you cherish inside you. You can become your own God, but it means nothing in the real world. It like playing a MMORPG. Nobody cares about you being level 99 in all stats. They are too worried about their own lives. That is your problem. You can not let things go, just like I could not let ignorance and denial go. Sometimes, all you can do is throw in the tower, retract your passionate wings, and soak in your own lake of fervid, wordly existence. You can be a strong man on the inside, a man of great will and power, but you must realise that you are conflicting with two entirely irrelevlant realities that only co-exist. Your reality inside you, your personal values and experiences are only a choice to be accepted by others - while most of the time - being chosen to be ignored, because people always expect more rather than less in this greedy, misinformed reality of ours.

Stay strong, is all I can say my friend. Stand for who you are, and one day, a girl will see you stand out from the crowd. If you lie down and crawl from frustration, that moment you may meet, may not be met, because the girl won't be able to see you crawling underneath the crowd you let stomp all over you.

[PuRpLe-KusH]

Its all about who has the most Guce, and who's thirstier(word?)

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 11:39 PM, Sensationalism wrote: Cuz women have standards and pick people that are worthy. Guys want anything that moves.

Major generalization.

[SatanBrain]

They hold sway over you only as much as you let them. Condemn your indiscipline and urges for it.

[Boss]

yo son. u nee d d a big dic

[Richard]

At 5/12/12 11:39 PM, Sensationalism wrote: Cuz women have standards and pick people that are worthy. Guys want anything that moves.

Thank you for generalizing and stereotyping the entire human race. I thought you were smarter than that.

[MatrixGravity]

At 5/12/12 11:33 PM, Insanctuary wrote:

At 5/12/12 11:26 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

Now you have a teaspoon of relation to how I feel. Instead of your concerns of the world as a whole, you have concerns for the attitudes of a general female character - based off of your own introspection - at the least. They do not see what you cherish inside you. You can become your own God, but it means nothing in the real world. It like playing a MMORPG. Nobody cares about you being level 99 in all stats. They are too worried about their own lives. That is your problem. You can not let things go, just like I could not let ignorance and denial go. Sometimes, all you can do is throw in the tower, retract your passionate wings, and soak in your own lake of fervid, wordly existence. You can be a strong man on the inside, a man of great will and power, but you must realise that you are conflicting with two entirely irrelevlant realities that only co-exist. Your reality inside you, your personal values and experiences are only a choice to be accepted by others - while most of the time - being chosen to be ignored, because people always expect more rather than less in this greedy, misinformed reality of ours.

Stay strong, is all I can say my friend. Stand for who you are, and one day, a girl will see you stand out from the crowd. If you lie down and crawl from frustration, that moment you may meet, may not be met, because the girl won't be able to see you crawling underneath the crowd you let stomp all over you.

Very eloquently spoken, I am greatly impressed. You are entirely right.. Perhaps one day I will get my break and be able to share joy with a special person. I've only briefly experienced love in my life before and it is a wonderful feeling. It feels so unattainable though. The process of finding the one that's right for you requires a great deal of work and perseverance. But I guess it would pay off if I found somebody. I have been single for about 2 years now. My last relationship was very brief and lasted for only a little over a month. It never got a chance to fully blossom and I was pretty much stuck paying the price with sorrow. Since then I have grown a bit bitter and developed resentment towards the world for unknown reasons. But thankfully I have acquired a great deal of wisdom through the process. Wisdom transcends all, I would say. You can't replace it. It is the only thing I can really cherish.

[Insanctuary]

At 5/12/12 11:47 PM, MatrixGravity wrote:

You can't replace it. It is the only thing I can really cherish.

Wisdom and intuition go hand in hand, my friend. These two can never go wrong if you stay strong and aware.

Glad I can help. : )

[DoctorStrongbad]

If men didn't chance women, there would be many sad women.