First off, my apologies for the extremely late review -- but, better late than never!
What worked well:
- Super organic Ceevro-styled track!
- Great, meaningful lyrics.
- Fantastic guitar work (clean solos)!
- Nice mixing overall.
- Great blending of instruments/vocals (not including 2:03 - 2:37).
This goes without saying, this track has your clean-cut style written all over it. Your guitar playing is a hallmark of your songs, and this one is no exception. The lyrics, as mentioned, are certainly meaningful and in a way I think they are quite heartfelt. The mixing is clean, and I think you've recorded each element of the track well!
What to consider for next time:
- The vocals are very hit-and-miss here.
- The 'raw' quality of the song is entirely negated at the 2:03 marker.
- The conclusion, as others have mentioned, leaves a lot to be desired.
Some notes sound great, some notes not so great. It seems that you aren't making use of breathing techniques to facilitate full notes. For instance, the line: "And all of my everything just came down today" was sung in a relaxed way, your voice works well here! However, the next line: "but all of my nothing is hangin' around" sounds quite stretched. In particular, the "NUH" in nothing and the "AH" and "OU" sounds in around are sung incorrectly; the notes are falling flat. Furthermore, at the 2:03 marker, your vocals don't quite blend well (but this is mostly due to various notes being sung off-key).
The mixing was also weak from this point until 2:37. I think it was just far too busy, and a simplistic approach would have worked far better. From 2:37 onwards, you settle back into a simple sound again but the track ends abruptly and as a result, things are left feeling a little unbalanced.
I enjoyed listening to this one, and I am baffled at the fact that you wrote and recorded this in ONE day. Major props! Keep at it, Ceevro!