Other than picky grammar corrections, great work.
It was pretty good. I was distracted by the various grammatical errors though. Semicolons are only to be used when there are fully developed, complete sentences on both sides. For example:
Maybe I'm just a post for the other guests to lean upon; somebody to prop up the roof should they bring it down upon themselves.
This is incorrect. The second is not a complete sentence. There is no verb for the subject. Also, Colons (:) are only used to begin a list or to define whatever is before the colon. for example "There was only one thing I wanted: to be like everyone else" is correct, for the second defines the "thing" that is wanted. However...
... in the grandest hall of the city: there are checkerboard floors...
is incorrect. And following this--
there are checkerboard floors as far as the eye can bother; open buffets for the loose belted ; a beautiful chandelier...
-- the first is a complete sentence, but the following fragments are incorrect uses of semicolons.
As for positive things, your vocabulary is remarkable and I loved the tone. Look into some of the more technical grammatical rules (just for class and readability purposes) and keep up the great work.