Way to fuck up, kid
It was a 2020 night like any other. Me surfing on the web, bothered by the bananahundred pages of spam and porn I would find in my way. Suddenly, I hit newgrounds.
Me: YAY!
Suddenly, I notice an important message from Tom Fulp, that reads 'READ THIS, YOU FOO''
The link goes to a forum post, in which Tom states the following:
'Greetings, Newgrounders!
I have noticed that there's been an increase of shitty submissions, and a decrease in activity since 2012, when the most talented artists of our userbase commited suicide, thinking it was the end of the world. Ever since then, only you noobs and me are left. My proposal is this.
Make or join a collab to at least try to sum up your efforts in something productive. It doesn't even need to be a flash. Any activity that makes you fuckers move your bum is fine.
Oh, I forgot. Those who don't join or create a collab activity of the likes, will get in touch with my banhammer.
<3s u, Tom'
After finishing, I thought of only how fucked I was going to be, considering that my Flash skills were nearly unexistant, and that most collabs left were pure crap. My only option was to make one myself.
I started typing...
[Meanwhile, in the Internet HQ]
Bob: Hey, Carl, where did you put my stapler?!
Carl: It fell under your desk.
Bob: Oh, thanks.
As he kneeled and reached out for his stapler, Bob's wristwatch got stuck with a plug on the wall. After pulling strongly enough, the plug got unplugged, and then everything went to hell. Well, not really, but Bob hurried to put the plug back in it's place. When he got out from under his desk, he noticed that that plug was from a small box, that read 'Newgrounds Forum Database', and that it had a small yellow postit that said 'Unplug = Deletion of data'
Bob: Oh, boy... I'll have some serious paperwork to fill.
[Back with meee]
Me: Done! The people will not be able to resist this collab!
I hit the 'Post it! >' button, and waited. Soon, everyone was joining. By the first two hours, half of the entire userbase had already signed up! I couln't believe it!
When the entire userbase had signed up, I was about to jizz my pants. I then posted at the end of the thread:
'People, I thank you for joining! Tomorrow is going to be remembered for ever. The 'Not Newgrounds Day', where everyone stays out of newgrounds for the entire day! No watching submissions, no listening to anything in the audio portal, no Newgrounds!!'
What had really happened, was that all other collab threads had been erased, and the people, fearing that Tom would ban them for not having any evidence whatsoever that they had joined a collab, joined the first and only collab that had appeared after the erase.
The clock hit 00:00. All activity in the forums and portals ceased. There was not one digital soul moving through the site. Just one. A teeny-tiny one. It was Tom, who was wondering 'What the fuck?!'
Half a day passed, and strangely, all those who had finally been able to unplug themselves from the computer, found something else. Something strange... new... alien. They discovered, the outside world, and for the first time in ages, risking their skin to melt, and their eyes to boil, they went outside.
The next time the clock hit 00:00, Tom was eager to see who was the first one to log in, but nothing. Then, the 'Today's Best' section in the bottom of the site went gray. Soon, the Games and Movies of the week sections also went gray. The entire site was dying, for the users had found something else outside. Tom's mind was beginning to crack... he started to blam submissions, and to ban random accounts, just to do something... soon, he was in a corner, in a fetal position, his mind now nearly mashed like potatos, and hallucinations rampaging all over the place. Inside Tom's pink brain, hell had broke loose.
Hank came in screaming, yelling gibberish nobody could understand, but what really was astonishing, was the fact that he had now arms, legs and a neck, as well as a normal complexion. Everyone stared as he run against one of Tom's Brain walls, hit it head on, and fell to the ground, unconcious. Dad and son, the clock crew, Tricky, Pico, the stickmen and all the rest of newgrounds beloved characters were starting to be swallowed by the madness. Hank woke up, and turned into a beast of blue and black flames. Tricky pulled two SMGs from his pockets, and started firing while running away.
Dad fell on his knees, and started shifting. He went from purple to pink, and long, blonde hair started to come out from his head. As Dad stood up, and a dress appeared in his still uber-muscular body, to Son's horror, it was Dad no longer. Now, it was Mom. Son tried to run, but soon undercame the same change, and before he noticed, he was throwing flowers and granades from a basket while hopping like little red riding hood.
The strawberry king was scared shitless. 'What. Shall. We. Do?', Orange asked in his normal digital voice. Strawberry said 'Run like hell, and prepare for the worst!'. What surprised everyone was that Strawberry said that with a normal voice. 'I have a normal voice?', he said. 'I HAVE A NORMAL VOICE, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH', he yelled, and started running in circles, followed by the rest of his crew, who were undergoing the same effects. After a few secconds, they were run down by a tankman carrying the tank on his shoulders.
Everyone's activity ceased, as they all looked up. On the brain-sky, a huge angry face was shining bright. Soon, a twitch in an eye, followed by the curve in it's mouth flattening, put everyone in a state of panic, and sent everyone running arround in circles, and the whole place to catch on fire. The angry faic was now happy.
It was the end.
[A few days later]
As I came back from the outside, after rolling in a field of flowers and bathing with the sun's embracing light, I went to the fridge to have a drink. As I walked back to the front door, I stopped next to the computer. I stared at it for a seccond, and sat down in my chair. I accesed Newgrounds, and a 404-Not Found page appeared. 'Hmm... Could it be?', I thought. I grabbed the remote, turned on the TV, and put on the news channel.
'Thank you, John. That was an interesting weather report. Now, to something downright tragic. Earlier this morning, Newgrounds CEO Tom Fulp ended his life by watching a marathon of Jonas Brothers and all of Justin Beiber's videos. Despite this gruesome and brutal death, his remains shall be mourned later this afternoon. On a suicide letter, he wrote:
'Fuck you boom, I hope you rot in hell, you fucked up my life, goodbye.'
After this, the page was filled with drawings of penises.
In other news, I'm not wearing any pants. More, after the break.'
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-_-
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>:C
Me: Bloody fucking hell!!!!11
The end
Hope you like it.
Feel free to add other characters in the mind chaos scene, but make sure it's before the angry faic part.