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Author Comments

Originally composed for a close friend of mine and his wife-- a young couple. I consider him as a brother, and when I heard his wife had a miscarriage, I grieved for them. This piece was first conceived the night I heard the news.

But don’t let this be a story only for others. This is for all who have lost a loved one. And if you haven’t experienced it yet, you will eventually. It would be an honor if this piece could be something you can return to some time amid this fleeting life.

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Once again, wow. First the one of love, then here of grief... this speaks to me just as much as the other one did, and more, much more here, maybe since grief is closer to heart; love still seems somewhat a foreign concept. Really teared up listening to this, didn't expect to, somehow it opens old wounds; tears up feelings I probably thought I'd forgotten and locked away, losses I felt I'd overcome; potential losses yet to come that I fear for...

Strange though, since the notion of loss itself has little effect. I wonder if this melody reminds me of another; if there's a resemblance to the music with say a really sad scene in a movie I've seen, like maybe Grave of the Fireflies - though I don't recognize any similarity. What sound so effectively correlates to grief; why is there a connection here; would using the same notes or combination of notes bring forth the same feeling every time, is it the pace, the build, the instruments, does it require this particular composition to work as well as it does what's the key component... I wonder.

Don't dare listen to this again right now or I might start bawling, but I'll keep it mind for times I may need it. Feels cathartic. So sad, but so beautiful. If you have too much baggage stashed away maybe you can open the floodgates a bit with this; gain some solace or peace again; let go of that burden. Life goes on...

Curious to see if it has the same effect at a later time too... beautiful work.


Phonometrologist responds:

You write much! Perhaps that is what suits you well in rapping since words in you seem to flow with ease.
Again, thank you for your contribution.
Since you brought up the question if melody, or some other aspect of music, may share the same language with other works to express loss, there may be a connection in how tension gets resolved in music. Whether it is done through harmonic structure, tempo, or even the arrangement, I think it could tie in with the motivation on how you would tell a story. But I wonder if one could hear loss in the music if I didn't provide a description to what contributed to my conceiving of it. I have my doubts if one would easily come to that conclusion unless one was able to experience first some kind of loss and meditate intently on the music.

Sometimes analyzing it in such a way is a mistake. I cannot explain it myself. I felt huge empathy for a friend in mourning. It felt as if I was mourning alongside him. I then played the piano with this harmonic structure in this tempo. Trying to accomplish writing for a certain mood would have surely tainted what was being felt earnestly in the moment.

Curious if it will have the same effect at a later time? I could tell you that it won't. These moments catch us off guard. If you go into it expecting to feel a certain way, it will certainly dissapoint. Music is a drug, and although grief over time may still be as powerful as the first time it hits you, the frequency of the waves will spread out over time.

Listening to this piece was a painful experience. I say this with raw gratitude. To revisit a wound is to remember you are human. Some wounds may never heal, but they can leave a beautiful scar. Thank you for writing this piece. It was a kindness to your friends.

Phonometrologist responds:

Thank you for contributing your thoughts on the matter. It's an honor.

Wow. Beautiful, reminds me of the cinematic orchestra.

Phonometrologist responds:

Thanks mate! I appreciate it

This pours out so many emotions... It would be great movie music. Maybe not even background music. It's so overtaking that the movie would be in the background while the music is at front.
I don't see the point in reviewing something like this, as it is so pure and honest. I don't really have anything to criticise either.

I can definitely see this as a fitting piece for loosing a family member, as it should be, considering it was conceived by the concept.
6 minutes flew by like they would've been but the length of a breath.
This is my favorite piece by you so far (and you've made a LOT of great songs).
Astounding job, Phonometrologist.

Phonometrologist responds:

Wow you are very generous with your words, and I am grateful. I don’t really expect anything in return when I write… I just hope that others such as yourself may find some enjoyment or even a therapeutic relief from hearing my music. It’s for you, and I’m glad you’re taking it in this way. Thank you thank you

You've achieved something with this that's incredible to me, and I don't know if it's the description influencing my feelings about the piece or not, but - the sweetness at the climax reminds me so powerfully of that feeling of finding something beautiful in the thick of despair. The tension at that point is so perfectly evocative of the beginning of healing and a strengthening of the soul that this goes straight into my 'modern masterpiece' category. <3

Phonometrologist responds:

You make me ponder on these words that you presented to me…
Although I’m not clear on what part the “climax” is, even for myself, I do understand your message. I would say, that is very accurate for myself at least.
I see this piece in two parts:
From the beginning to 3:30, the piece is in a flurry of chords. It starts out in E minor and transposes a half step up as it progresses. The symbolism of the moving parts is that of the many emotions and thoughts one may encounter through “despair.” There are just too many emotions that come to mind as one can’t possibly focus on a single thought. After that and through to the end, the piece sways back and forth just upon two chords.
It is a lullaby—originally meant for another to be put to sleep, but now for the one that grieves. Finding the beauty in the thick of despair, as you put it, reminds me of how often we do this when it comes to the world around us. Beauty in itself cannot be defined without the fleetingness of the subject we wish to prescribe the word to. Sometimes it is because of beauty we despair as it is so engraved in us that nothing in this world lasts forever. I just see the words “beauty” and “sorrow” as inseparable. Thank you for listening.

Credits & Info

4.97 / 5.00

Nov 23, 2014
6:32 PM EST
File Info
14.2 MB
6 min 12 sec

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