Hello, this is a cat that has been living under the same roof as me for roughly fifteen years now. Her name is Dora. She's diabetic and last night I learned she was getting put down today because she is just in plain poor health and it would just be for the best in general for her to not feel like shit anymore.

I remember being about three or four years old when I named her. For some reason, in that moment I was thinking of Dora the Explorer and named the cat after that kid's show. Jesus, that had to have been somewhere around 2008-2010.

Well, during the middle of writing this, my mom came in and said that at the vet's, she was so dehydrated that they could barely get the needle into her. So if anything, I guess that justifies putting her down more. She really couldn't have been feeling too good, and she was so old.

I cried while drawing this earlier today (I stayed up really late into the early morning hours). As per usual when a chapter comes to an end, I got thinking about regrets. I thought about the fact that it wasn't fair that she didn't get enough attention or get to live as much as she could have. I thought about how sad I found it that she did not deserve what her life brought to her. I felt like a rather selfish bastard for not paying enough attention to her when she was alive. I began to experience those usual feelings you feel around a moment of death when you think about how much you really should appreciate what and who you have before it's too late. I guess I should take that as a wake-up kick in the ass.

I tried to portray her as accurately as my memory allows, but I'm not totally certain that the image I created captures her appearance completely. I tried to go and look at her one last time to see her and get a reference for the picture, but she wasn't there.

Ah man. It definitely is helping that I have the ability to draw this out, and write this out. It's good to have a healthy way to express feelings directly. That's something I surely appreciate.

I kind of hope that when you die, it's like that ghost lady in Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire said. She said that after you die, you disintegrate particle by particle and finally become yet another part of the fabric of the universe. Existing in complete peace and contentment. Nirvana more or less.

I can't really think of anything else to write, but R.I.P. Dora (2008-2010? - April 8, 2024)

Originally Drawn: 4-8-2024