Why my self-confidence is low? Man a few things.
- I've got one hand. Yeah, I know you could argue all sorts of uplifting kinda positions based on TLC-like tv stuff or books, but when you're in that position, it's like listening to a rcih guy talk about how someone more poor than you suceeded or something. It can help sometimes, but not always, and not everybody.
- It was never a huge problem until school, when I got teased a ton for it. Yeah they were all jerks and problably needed needles applied liberally to the face or something, but it doesn't make it any different.
- Getting a bit of it from your govt doesn't help either. You can't join the Marines, Navy, Army, or Air Force, with a missing hand. I kinda fooled mysef into thinking I'd still get in, military service is in my blood, and it was a huge thing for me. Rejected by each one. Sometimes I still get a call because of my good testscores, and I have to say to them, I can't I have one hand. It's humiliating.
- Thats just some of it. I always have to make sure to shake with the left, because I've seen moments of disgust on the faces of the nicest of people when I shake with the hairy stump of my right wrist. What if I held hands with someone? I have to make sure I'm on their left so they can hold my left. All this stuff I can't do, or stuff people think I can't do. It looms over me.
-The rest is just my ineptness. I can write awesome lyrics to songs, and have won a prize or two at my college for writing, but when it comes to speaking I'm tongue-tied. And yeah, but while the episode in Canada was years ago, I know it was all me. SHe'd done nothing wrong, she liked me, me over tons of better looking guys. Guys with 2 hands. But she preffered me. Until I screwed it up. Yeah I was young, but I still screwed it up. I just don't want to screw up again, or to pick up my courage, only to be smashed back down with some disgusted look.

Note: Oh, and my internet's probably about to go out so don't be offended if I don't resp until tomorrow night. Thanks for listening.

Ok Lets take this from the top. The deal about you having one hand well I can only say that this is something that most likely you will always be a little self consious about. Just like the fact that I am a lot shorter than most guys and even girls that I run into. I mean yea people over come and what not but its still something that you will deal with the rest of your life. The thing to remember is that there is always going to be people that like you for you and dont care about looks or anything eles. I mean one girl already showed you that. As to being bad with words well then write the girls love poems or letters or a song about them. Those are things that most girls dream of. Yea the like smooth talkers like me but its so much more romantic when its something that they can hold and keep like a letter or a song. You have a gift there that I wish I had and I am sure you wish you had my silver tounge. Its all a matter of taking what ya got in life and making it work for you. Now on to the last one. That issue with the girl is NOTyour fault you were young and could not have known how to deal with the implacations of what she said. YYour reaction was natural. You can hold one failure over your head. The fear of rejection is natural but you cant let it stop you from living life. I am sure that if you gave a girl one of your songs or poems or the like with an invatation to coffee or lunch they would jump on the chance. I can teach you how to talk to a girl but you gotta make the contact. I can help you learn all the right questions to ask and how to tell what to say. All you need is a little bit of guts to take the chance. I will work with you if you think you want it.

Ok, my opinion on the whole thing. (I leave for 3 hours, then this happens. geez)

I'm actually kind of contradicting myself here, but you have to realize that the first girlfriend you have usually isn't going to be the one you end up with. It's more of an expiriment, really. Sort of a way to set up for someone better. She's learned things from this, and you've learned things from this (hopefully). The best bet would be move on, or maybe still be friends with her.

Also, (I know this is kind of strange) but look at you're handicap as an asset when you're looking for someone to be you're girlfriend. It sounds like you don't want someone who's shallow, and having a handicap will most likely discourage someone who's superfical, and only goes after looks. The women that are left, however, will see you as the truely good person you are. If they really care about you, they won't care if you have 2 hands or not.

Just remember that there are other fish in the sea, and you will most likely find someone who's you're type.

P.S.
Look into you're thinking about guns when you're depressed. It's just not healthy.

At 3/9/07 07:20 AM, Gorillazrock wrote:

At 3/9/07 06:26 AM, Whiplesh wrote: P.S: I know that I did post this before as a topic in "General," but someone advised me to post here for worth while tips.

With good reason, most of the people are more inteligent than most people to post on the general forums.

Which brings me back to my last post on this fine thread.
Two questions for you:
1) Why is it that nearly every situation I read from those in need can be solved with basic common sense? Even I'm in love, but it hasn't made me lose sight of practicality. I have this one friend who talks to me a lot about this ex-g'friend of his, and he won't stop talking in circles for 2 hours straight after I told him my opinion on the matter and gave my advice!

2) A much simpler yet almost ironic question:
Can I join and are there any details missing from the first page of the thread that I must know...

Well, it's always nice to get another person's opinion, right?

While you may think you keep you're head, you would be suprised at how biased you're opinion's on you're situation may be. It usually helps to have someone who is neutral in the situation. You're friends may tell you things to make it better, you're girlfriend may cover things up in fear of hurting you, but we have no reason to hide our true opinions.

as for the second question, i don't really think we have a real membership system. People just come and go as they please.

lol I just checked the first page and realized how "comprehensive" the rules are!

quik-e thread...?

yeah, we're pretty laid back i guess. What's you're opinion on onearmdude's situation?

I've been banned for a day, so I couldn't give my opinion...
I'll see what it's about. It's just that I'm gonna have to read it on Printed paper 'cause I'm gonna work soon.

ok, no rush.

*I hate bans as well*

onearmdude...

Your physical condition is very lamentable. I could not begin to imagine not having one of my arms. People teased you, but ya gotta remember that they were immature. It's just what kids do. I'm 16, but I, like many on here, am quite mature for my age. I'd like to second that you've come to the right place.

As for your girl situation, have you tried one of those search engines that find "schoolmates"? It is a good search tool. You can find people from all around. I apologize for the lack of a link...

I'll post more later on this subject.

At 3/13/07 08:48 PM, LtSurge659 wrote:

As for your girl situation, have you tried one of those search engines that find "schoolmates"? It is a good search tool. You can find people from all around. I apologize for the lack of a link...

I didn't know those things actually worked.

I figured they were scams. Have you used one before with any success?

Yeah I guess I need help, i'll keep it simple. I like my friends sister I tlak to her and stuff, he knows btw took it better than I thought he would. She doesn't know how I feel though. I want to ask her out to a movie or something but I don't know how. Any excuse to talk to her is good enough i'm jumping on any chance I get.
Long story short i'd like some advice on how to ask her out/ tell her how i feel.

At 3/14/07 01:04 AM, JarredJoffe wrote: i have a problem! im tirde

Leave, right now. This thread is not a place for you to come and complain about how you're tired. All you do is spam the threads and it has to stop right now. If you're going to post something then please make it intelligent and relevant to the topic. If you can't do that then please leave.

At 3/13/07 11:08 PM, Gorillazrock wrote:
I didn't know those things actually worked.

I figured they were scams. Have you used one before with any success?

I remember using this one for finding a girl I knew in Elementary. It was about 2 years ago, so I don't know if it's become a scam or not.

You know the site name? (Geez, it's like people are trying to hide them or something.

I believe (although like I said it was a while ago) it was "classmates.com"
I'll try that myself and see what I get.

I'm on the right track. Although this one does not include Elementary school.

*dam*

Well, if onearmdude knows where his girl attended, he could prolly use this one.

Well, i was sort of asking a different question.

Do you think he should go after her still, or do you think he should let bygone's be bygone's?

I personally think he should go for it. One little slip up like that can be corrected easliy, but it may be a little hard if she's seeing someone. i think he should meet her, then become friends with her again. If the sparks are still there, they'll start flying.

Actually, yes in fact I believe he should. I mean, why else would I bringit up?

I've never posted here before, but I've been reading this club for quite a while.
I'd just like to add (to the onearmdude situation) that myspace is also good for finding people. Most people have one nowadays afterall.

true, but i still prefer facebook better. I've used both, and even though myspace doesn't support html, it's better.

Actually, it's better because it can't have html, since people don't mess with the overall design. I could try to do that, but what if i don't remember thier last name? How do i know that it's the same person?

At 3/14/07 11:50 AM, Gorillazrock wrote: true, but i still prefer facebook better. I've used both, and even though myspace doesn't support html, it's better.

I'm pretty sure Myspace is more popular though. Thus the chances of finding someone on there are higher.

At 3/14/07 11:42 AM, Nev wrote: Most people have one nowadays afterall.

Despite how little it matters, I don't.

Sorry for double post but could someone reply to my cry for help on the previous page.

At 3/13/07 11:46 PM, Ganon-Dorf wrote: Yeah I guess I need help, i'll keep it simple. I like my friends sister I tlak to her and stuff, he knows btw took it better than I thought he would. She doesn't know how I feel though. I want to ask her out to a movie or something but I don't know how. Any excuse to talk to her is good enough i'm jumping on any chance I get.
Long story short i'd like some advice on how to ask her out/ tell her how i feel.

I apologize for not replying. I have no excuse. Now then, on with the "what I'd do" trip...

Since your friend knows, why not ask him what she likes and base your strategy around that.
I would. Of course, I'd keep it confidential.
That, or just ask her if she likes to go see movies. If she does, then ask later if she'd like to go see one. Make sure you know the genre she likes, and it'd help if you liked said genre, too.

As for telling her how you feel...
Yer gonna have to wait, unless you knew her for some time. How long have you known her for?

Ok, FYI, being a "Player" usually doesn't help you find someone you can really connect with. If you can't connect with someone, how can you ever really love them.

Is he in this crew...

Gorillazrock, although I suck, I'm gonna try a sig for you. Just ta mix things up.
Here...

thanks, but i'm just going to work on my own. I know it's kind of slopped on, but i'll get the hang of GIMP soon...