Why won't she stop?

[BetaOrionis]

There's a girl I know who keeps buying me gifts. It seems to be uncontrollable and I cannot get her to stop. I've explained rationally that I don't want any gifts, I re-explain it every time I get a new one, but she just won't stop. I don't buy her things, or take her out. She has a boyfriend, they've been together for years. She makes no moves on me, nor I on her. She claims that she just likes making other people happy, and thus, I get gifts. I don't see her very often, maybe once every few weeks, but she doesn't have many good friends, so she wants to hang out an awful lot.

I think she's just worried that I'll stop hanging out with her, so in an effort to keep me, she buys me stuff. I'm not into gift-giving, and I'm not into gift receiving either. Some of the things she's gotten me are pretty cool, but she doesn't have that much money to throw around and neither do I.

Have any of you guys had similar experiences? How can I stop her? HOW!?

[aninjaman]

Seems really clingy and needy.
If you actually like her explain that you can be friends without all the gift giving.

[ApotheosisLost]

You do the only rational thing you can; beat her.

But no, don't beat her with your fists. Beat her with your mind.

Give her a mind beating.

[YourFutureMaster]

If you want her to stop giving you gifts then tell her to go fuck herself. If you do it right she will never want to talk to you again.

[MushookieMan]

At 4/2/09 07:27 PM, ApotheosisLost wrote: You do the only rational thing you can; beat her.

But no, don't beat her with your fists. Beat her with your mind.

Give her a mind beating.

Better yet beat her with your dick.

[robtai18]

Woh, as you say she wont go away. Maybe you should just tell her to go away, or to stop giving the gifts once and for all otherwise you wont hang out. If she doesn't listen just ignore her or tell her to fuck off. Sounds a bit strange I must say

[alucardxmeow]

Tell her you don't need gifts to be happy.

[knightsofni]

I think she likes you dude, If she realizes or not, it happens.

[o0-0o]

Go down on her. Solution to all girl problems.

[BetaOrionis]

At 4/2/09 07:27 PM, aninjaman wrote: Seems really clingy and needy.
If you actually like her explain that you can be friends without all the gift giving.

I tried that. No dice.

At 4/2/09 07:31 PM, alucardxmeow wrote: Tell her you don't need gifts to be happy.

I tried that, too.

At 4/2/09 07:31 PM, knightsofni wrote: I think she likes you dude, If she realizes or not, it happens.

Hopefully not, but if that's the case,

At 4/2/09 07:32 PM, o0-0o wrote: Go down on her. Solution to all girl problems.

then this would only aggravate the situation, not to mention that

At 4/2/09 07:30 PM, MushookieMan wrote:

At 4/2/09 07:27 PM, ApotheosisLost wrote: You do the only rational thing you can; beat her.

But no, don't beat her with your fists. Beat her with your mind.

Give her a mind beating.

Better yet beat her with your dick.

I don't want to.

*cries*

[aninjaman]

You said she has a boyfriend.
Talk to him about it. She might listen to him more.

[BrockManson]

What sort of gifts is she giving you?

[aninjaman]

At 4/2/09 07:38 PM, BrockManson wrote: What sort of gifts is she giving you?

If they are good gifts then just keep taking them without complaining.

[BetaOrionis]

At 4/2/09 07:38 PM, aninjaman wrote: You said she has a boyfriend.
Talk to him about it. She might listen to him more.

I thought about that, but I'm not sure how he'd take it. I don't know him very well, or at all, really. It's a risky move, so I don't think it would be worth it. If it comes down to that, I might have to.

At 4/2/09 07:38 PM, BrockManson wrote: What sort of gifts is she giving you?

A High Sierra sport backpack, hand-made soaps, a few books, various home-made cakes.

At 4/2/09 07:43 PM, aninjaman wrote: If they are good gifts then just keep taking them without complaining.

I'd rather not. It's an unnecessary financial strain for her and she's in debt. I can't deal with people giving me stuff. It makes me feel like I'm not meeting them half-way, ya know? I can't be dragged into a gift war, so getting stuff makes me really uncomfortable.

[aninjaman]

At 4/2/09 07:49 PM, BetaOrionis wrote: I thought about that, but I'm not sure how he'd take it. I don't know him very well, or at all, really. It's a risky move, so I don't think it would be worth it. If it comes down to that, I might have to.

How could it hurt to try?

[STEM]

You're getting cake? For free?
Just tell her to stop sending you things you can't eat, like that backpack and those books. I did just that to my gf, and now we just bake things together. And it's delicious.

[Shnam]

I would gladly accept gifts.

[Elder]

Here's a guy who went through the same, follow his advice.

[speakerlight]

I'm feeling bad for this girl.in dept,no friends,and really wants to keep you as her friend.how about just trying to hang out with her more that might bring ya two closer.try to give her a gift once in a while to.nothing big,just something that says you notice and appreciate.

[Kwing]

In a word, that's weird. I honestly can't say I know what to do. If she won't listen, just deal with it and sell the stuff on eBay.

[Maximus]

Slap dat bitch in the face with you backhand.

HOE

[NeverHundred]

My brother was like that. He used to spend all his money on other people, buying them gifts and things. He wasn't discriminant about it either. Half the time people wouldn't even ask him but once people started catching wind than all his friends started expecting him to buy them shit... and when he couldn't they'd get pissed at him.

It's pretty dumb to try to make everyone happy. It's something you can't succeed at.

[BetaOrionis]

At 4/2/09 07:53 PM, aninjaman wrote:

At 4/2/09 07:49 PM, BetaOrionis wrote: I thought about that, but I'm not sure how he'd take it. I don't know him very well, or at all, really. It's a risky move, so I don't think it would be worth it. If it comes down to that, I might have to.

How could it hurt to try?

I don't get along with girls' boyfriends. Ever. They just don't trust me. Normally, it's justified, but I'm genuinely not interested in this one.

At 4/2/09 07:53 PM, STEM wrote: You're getting cake? For free?

I know, I shouldn't complain.

Just tell her to stop sending you things you can't eat, like that backpack and those books. I did just that to my gf, and now we just bake things together. And it's delicious.

That's a pretty good idea, actually. Thanks very much.
:D

At 4/2/09 08:04 PM, NeverHundred wrote: My brother was like that. He used to spend all his money on other people, buying them gifts and things. He wasn't discriminant about it either. Half the time people wouldn't even ask him but once people started catching wind than all his friends started expecting him to buy them shit... and when he couldn't they'd get pissed at him.

I've heard that story from her, too. People like that run into a real dilemma: The people who like the gifts come to expect them, and become high-maintenance, and the friends who don't want them, don't want them.

It's pretty dumb to try to make everyone happy. It's something you can't succeed at.

Agreed. Everyone should just try to make themselves happy, that's all. Sometimes that entails making others happy, and so that's what keeps the world turning. But when your primary source of happiness is the happiness of others, you'll require a LOT of resources to be happy.

[Dogmeat]

Send the gifts to me.

Problem solved.

[Pokemonpoeguygcn]

At 4/2/09 08:58 PM, Dogmeat wrote: Send the gifts to me.

Problem solved.

Except what are you going to do with a bunch of gifts that's already opened?

[Dogmeat]

At 4/2/09 09:01 PM, Pokemonpoeguygcn wrote:

At 4/2/09 08:58 PM, Dogmeat wrote: Send the gifts to me.

Problem solved.

Except what are you going to do with a bunch of gifts that's already opened?

Use them... I don't give a fuck if they're opened already. And if he doesn't want them, just send them to me without opening them in the first place.

[Zergzealot]

well, she doesn't have much friend huh?I would like to meet this person and make friends with her.

[Mercenary81]

I read this whole thread without realizing it was you Beta.

Sticky jam you got yourself in. I'd say to talk to her boyfriend. It's like a win win situation - if he listens to you, he'll help you out. If he takes it the wrong way, he'll try and keep her away from you. And if he tries to beat you up, you can climb up a tree and if worst comes to worst, you can stick a pole through his head.

[NERVdamage]

At 4/2/09 08:01 PM, Elder500 wrote: Here's a guy who went through the same, follow his advice.

lol

If this girl seems like she wouldn't want you to tell her boyfriend about you getting these gifts then you know there's something more to this then friendship. If you "really" don't want them then just say, "I can't accept this anymore." and DON'T take it. Also, if you like this chick as a friend then maybe make it up to her one day.

[BetaOrionis]

At 4/2/09 09:08 PM, Mercenary81 wrote: I read this whole thread without realizing it was you Beta.

Sticky jam you got yourself in. I'd say to talk to her boyfriend. It's like a win win situation - if he listens to you, he'll help you out. If he takes it the wrong way, he'll try and keep her away from you.

She's a friend. I don't need her gone, I just need her gifting habits amended.

And if he tries to beat you up, you can climb up a tree and if worst comes to worst, you can stick a pole through his head.

Oh teh noes! An inside joke, OUTSIDE!?
>8Q