Giving away front page for just about anything now
The music was an excellent mood-setter (and you didn't even make it), but apart from that, this flash had nothing going for it.
Your art skills need work. There's nothing to be proud of in "This game has been completely drawn with the mouse." If you can make better art by employing other methods, then go ahead and use them. The whole thing is an eyesore. Why does it look like the man is clutching his stomach with one hand that's longer than the other? Why do his legs piston up and down when he's standing still like he needs to go to the bathroom? Why is there a random counter in the middle of the scenery? Why does the font on the counter not match the pixelated style of the rest of the flash?
I don't want to be mean, but your English needs work. Even if it's not your first language, the least you can do is proofread your translations before publishing something to a real audience. It makes you look extremely unprofessional to have stuff like "mery" in your final design. What does that even mean? Is it a misspelling of Mary? Is that the woman's name? Did you miss a "c" and fail to spell "mercy"? The world may never know.
I can't even continue to criticize this flash, because there is no depth to it. Your story leaves too much to the imagination. Mystery is only a good storytelling technique when used sparingly with rich details sprinkled generously in between.
You made this into a game, but you should have made a movie. There isn't any gameplay involved. There's just a simple one-dimensional story that you didn't even do a good job telling.
I'm sorry, but stuff like this doesn't belong on Newgrounds. How did it get a front page spot?
