Medal Guide
Here is my medal guide that is better than mattanderson776's.
K.
Use coins or something else small and heavy to hold down the K key, then do something else for an hour (like, i don't know, maybe go OUTSIDE for once!).
Show Contestant
Press tab then put a shoe on the space button for about 16 and a half minutes.
War Hero
Right click-forward then right click-back a bunch of times, which speeds it up a lot, then go play something else in a new tab while you wait.
Human Test Subject
Right click-forward then right-click-back a bunch of times, which speeds it up a lot, then enter '04 18 40 39 2' every time 208 goes all the way down.
The Pianist
Copy the text in this news post: http://max15946.newgrounds.com/news/p ost/328469, then paste the text into the Pianist game.
(Secret) John Locke
In 208, type this code: 4 8 15 16 23 42 instead of the code it tells you to.
Anyway, really funny game, but frustrating if you don't use these cheats.