Not bad
I really liked the beginning until the drums came in. In my opinion, they were just too harsh for the song, or at least at that point in the song. And when that loop comes back, it's also too loud.
I would consider this song semi-progressive. As for the builds, if your looking to make this song epic, I kind of suspect it would need to be in a different key. Also, in order for the builds to be epic, the stuff in which it's building to must be epic. Your version is a version best left soft.
But that's just my personal opinion. Good mix either way.
8/10
4/5
S{o}E