As someone who has worked in the restaurant business (as a server) and been subjected to the birthday shit, I also find the practices rather irritating.

And going to a customer while their mouths are full IS absolutely planned out: the idea for the business is that if their mouths are full, they can't really do much aside from nodding their head or give a thumbs up when you ask how the food is. I personally never saw the appeal in doing shit like that and therefore NEVER did it myself.

For the birthday thing, I was out of town at a steakhouse thing, and not only was there a customer there that had to endure the shitty birthday song, but they also had to wear a hat thing with antlers on it, and they made all the other patrons sing along (I did not). As soon as that was over, I turned to the person I was at the venue with and said "and this is why I don't tell people my birthday," and told them that if they ever embarrassed me like that I would walk out of the venue and stop talking to them permanently.

So yeah... TLDR, I totally relate to this rant haha

It's the same shit again, foamy speaks and speaks.

The screaming baby is a plot to find all the hungover patrons and make them leave

oi. I went to a BBQ place the other day, first time checking this place out. I order my food, get it quickly, and as I sit down and start to eat these awesome ribs, an announcement comes on over the loud speaker: "and now please rise for the nation anthem, like we do every day at noon"

"wut........?" Everyone rises. Hats are removed. "......son of a bitch."

Thus I stand cause I'm dead center in the room, and so is the flag that everyone is looking at. Placed in each corner of the dining area are four TVs suspended from the ceiling. All are playing a close up gif of an american flag flapping in the wind.

I was displeased greatly from being delayed in my meal. The food was great, but I will never go midday to this establishment.

So I was at this restaurant, and all of the sudden the staff started screaming and running. Turns out some damn squirrel had decided to slice and disembowel a waiter or two, and I have to say, it really put me off my meal.