The fact that you made the story telling only visual is a +. But the story itself is IMO kinda cliché, don't you think?
I would advise you to look at your pacing a little bit closer. your charachters legs were getting all over the place tho I think this was because you made this with a mouse, if this is not the case try to make some cleaner lines next time, or maybe do the keyframes first and then the inbetweens (I can't really tell if you've done that or not). Also, you need to use your layers a little bit better. I'm not sure if this is true but I think you've accidentaly drawn your charachter on the background layer (or vice versa) or maybe you made a new ground line every few frames which I cannot explain myself.
Even if the most important thing about this is the story I really wanted to incourage you to not lazy-out on animation. Animation is IMO a very cool skill to have and the better your animation is the easier it is to understand the story. So please even if you're not good yet, shoot for the moon and if you miss you'll land by the stars.