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Remembered - Jordan Allen

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Author Comments

Jordan Allen is an unsigned singer songwriter (and my cousin) who I am happy to have made this music video for! This is my first large project, so any constructive criticism for the animation quality is very welcome!

'Remembered' is available from ITunes here: https://itunes.apple.com/gb/album/i-wanna-be-remembered-single/id843729994

www.facebook.com/jordanallenuk www.twitter.com/jord_allen
www.soundcloud.com/jord_allen

"'I Wanna' Be Remembered' is a masterpiece -- gushing tongue 'n' cheek lyrics whilst managing to mix classic rock 'n' roll with a refreshingly innovative vibe. - See more at: http://www.gigslutz.co.uk/unsigned-act-of-the-week-jordan-allen/#sthash.HQoWEETq.dpuf"

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This is a really good song. Very catch refrain and a very good voice (the voice remembers me of some other -quite famous- singer... but I can't remember the name right now. Bummer :( ).
The production quality is amazing as well. Every instrument can be heard just fine and even the drums don't drown out the voice. Whoever mastered this song seems to be a master of his trade.

The animations are all right. I like that you included the lyrics in such a way and that you also varied how the lyrics appear on the screen.
The graphics could use some work. Everything looks a bit rough. The graphics work for the frat boys at the beginning and the end of the video, as it underlines the "fratboyism" of the characters presented. But I think during the main part of the song, better looking graphics would help a lot. The main character would be working his way up, from singing for frat boys to singing in stadiums all around the world. This could be underlined by a change of graphical style (kind of like how dream sequences in movies are shot in a different style than the rest of the film). At the end, the main character would then "wake up" in the cruel reality of a frat house, where no one is listening to that weird guy on the stage.

{ Review Request Club }

Man, it's a shame this has gone under the radar with a score of less than 3, 'cause it's really good. Not the best but good.

The story was great, for both the video and the song. Everything flowed nicely and seemed very thought out. This had good direction too and was a well put together music video.

Art and animation were all right. The animation was pretty good and there was a lot of movement. The art could use some work though. The majority of drawings were a bit simplistic and the inconsistent line quality and thickness didn't really look all that good. Practice makes perfect though, and from the looks of it, you have the potential and the want to be something better so with time I'm sure you can improve.

The audio was great. Since this is a music video, clearly the only audio present was the song, and what a song it was. I've already talked about the story of it and the lyrics were great too. Everything about it sounded great and I can definitely see the artist being big some day, so good job to both of you!

Overall this was good. Art could use some work but you've shown you can tell a coherent story accompanied by some decent visuals. The animation was good so I'm sure with a more appealing art style this could be amazing. I look forward to your future works, to see how you improve!

Jaybabywolf responds:

Really awesome review, thank you! I've really been working on my art style the past few months and learning from this animation and what could be better. Hopefully releasing something next week for the NATA which is looking a lot better aesthetically, and I'll definitely be sure to pass on the praise to my cousin too :) cannot thank you enough for the praise though, really means a lot!

Really nice animation and cool to see your cousin was the one providing the music. Really hope he and his band get signed onto a record label at some point.

The animation was nice. At times it seemed a bit scrapped looking such as when he was performing in front of that huge crowd which seemed non-existent. However, for the most part it was nice to see the variety of both animation and words flying by on the screen for switching between verses and the chorus.

The audio was pretty nice and the rhythm sounded pretty good. The only thing that felt off was that bit of dead static air at the start, after the guitar rhythm kicked in the dead static was not existent for the rest of the animation.

Overall, very nicely done. Props to you and your cousin.

Review Request Club

Jaybabywolf responds:

Thank you! I can't advocate on the music production side of things as I was handed the track as is and animated to it, but I'll pass the comments on!

The scrappy looking parts were a little rushed, I was sort of working to a deadline (my cousin's EP launch) so there were parts that could've been improved with more care and attention to them. Besides that though I'm extremely happy with it and I'm really grateful for the aweosme feedback! Seriously, thank you :D

Whoah? Your cousin made this song? I would've given this 3.5 stars, but the music really brought it up to 4 stars!

To the animation then. It's pretty decent! At some points, it's actually pretty good (Far better than anything I could make :p). If you just started, you're on a really good way! Of course, there's room for MUCH improvement, but that is always the case in the beginning. I don't really have too much to comment on, as I'm not an animatior, but I think that this flowed really well. You did an especially good job with the lyrics that popped up, I think, and you use some challenging camera angles at times, which is always good practice. From a purely animational standpoint, my favorite part is probably 1:41-1:49. If you want a better review, don't be afraid to ask the Rewiew Request Club here on Newgrounds (I'm sure you can find it)!

Anyhow, good job!

P.S. If you remember, tell your cousin he's a great musician ;)

Jaybabywolf responds:

Oh man this has made my night a little, thank you! I'll probably just show my cousin your comment for him to see for himself, he'll be ecstatic!

I started more or less a few months a go around December on and off as a hobby, one that I'm hoping to get a little more serious with. To be getting this kind of feedback right now really means a lot!

Not sure what else to say except thank you, you're awesome, and I'm gonna keep practicing!

You have a great sense of movement, and know how to make an animation not seem still all the time. Drawing can improve, but it's not always the design that makes an animation good.
As for audio, your cousin is talented. I will keep remembering this guy (see what i did there?) as i really like this style. Props to both of you

Jaybabywolf responds:

Thanks for the review man! I'll definitely pass on the kind words to my cousin!

And I'll agree with you on the drawing front, but I'm definitely working on my drawing skills and hopefully focus a bit more on my use of colour and clean up.

But thank you for the compliments man, it means a lot to hear it!

Credits & Info

Views
2,026
Faves:
2
Votes
6
Score
4.48 / 5.00

Uploaded
Apr 4, 2014
10:58 AM EDT
Genre
Music Video
Tags