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Author Comments

This is my first animation, so I would love critiques.

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The colors look okay*

*okay~ fine

Not bad. The animation was good but it's not really good materal.

For your first this isn't bad, but you've got a little ways to go. The animation isn't bad, but it's mostly static. You did good on the facial expressions and everything there, but the rest needs something. Movement, scene changes, perspective shifts, these are all good things to use as you do more ambitious shorts.

You really need to work on your writing, but I'm guessing animation was more the goal here than a good joke. Same goes for voices, but again, that's probably a secondary concern. Still, it's always good to remember that good writing and voice work can bring a lot to otherwise average animation, and awful voice work with bad writing will kill hamper even the finest of animation.

Overall, I see a lot of potential. Your technique will improve the more you animation, so just keep at you'll see improvement.

Final thought: Loops are almost never a good thing. The replay button is your friend.

Kinda cute i guesssssss

Simple and a bit funny,

Would be better if it didn't loop

Credits & Info

Views
1,964
Votes
9
Score
2.28 / 5.00

Uploaded
Jan 13, 2013
7:16 PM EST