Like the drawing style, not sure how it would cope with movement though. And as you probably know the audio is all kinds of messed up. Never the less look forward to more from you.
Gorgeous visuals, very stylish, but why does the audio quality differ from sentence to sentence?
needed a better mic for your voice.....
The audio is inconsistent, between crappy and alright. It is very distracting.
Second, I think you need to work on your script. It's a little trite, and very pretentious. Frankly, you're not covering any new ground here. This isn't challenging, and it doesn't make me thoughtful. It is actually only a shallow facsimile of depth.
If you want to fix it, get rid of the editorializing. Instead of saying "a restless woman going home to her kids blahblahblah," actually, you know, describe things and show us with your animation. Like, "The woman next to me fiddles with the corner of her bag-- she seems restless, tired, anxious to get home. I wonder if she has children waiting for her blahblahblah."
Also, your description of the man makes me grind my teeth, so definitely change that one.
Hey thanks for your comment, I really appreciate it. It was a short script I came out with a while back ago which I didn't change much. Would you recommend and perhaps give me an example of a different script? But one thing, I would like to keep the same visuals and scenes that it has right now. I will need to re-record the voice with a better mic as well, and will ad a pre-loader.
All the best
great beginning to your potential
as for improvements, character detail needs work, need more improvement with faces