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Green Glob Conques Earth!

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i don't want people watching this and going " crap acting" "cheap animation" "to short" it's ment to be!! it based around a film i found in my basement called " the green glob congues earth!" created by derek starch, it was awful, made on the budget of just £10 (no really) it was a film doomed from the start.

all the actors and crew hired to make this crap left after reading the script leaving poor old derek to make the whole thing him self :( he wouldn't allow me to remake the whole film (you'll find out why) but if this done well enough he would let me put in the lost scenes BUT to take me back to the start this is ment to look like a cheap film.

i'm not completely happy with this, if i'm honst but at least ai'm trying new things so if this fails we can move on :(

any way read my news post for more information on derek starch and his horrible film :D


lol another good one

how do you co,me up with this stuff

Clockworkpixel responds:

Dreams most of the time lol


I found this quite interesting. I enjoyed the animation. How everything is designed to look like a low buget film. I espically enjoyed the 'patato-on-a-stick-alien.'
The script doesn't make much sense, and of course could be better, but honestly...the execution of this film more then makes up for it. It doesn't have to make sense. It just needs to be funny. Seems to me Neo needs to figure that one out. The stuff here doesn't always need to make sense. NewGrounds exists to make people laugh, cry, and generally enjoy them selves. Shame on you Neo for your negative and unwornted criticizing of this enjoyable (if somewhat bewhildering) film.

Kudos to you mate for this piece. I for one enjoyed it.

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Clockworkpixel responds:

cheers once again :)


I thought it was a funny concept and shouldn't be criticized. Good job.

Clockworkpixel responds:

haha thanks


Ironic how this thing has any rating beyond .05. Seriously.

First of all, this was made poorly, then the author "cops out"--an admission of guilt in exchange for better treatment... look it up--by claiming it was his intent. Thus, this review is a zero strictly to avoid a political fiasco: what if EVERYBODY said "Hey! It's meant to look like utter shit! Give me Fives anyway!" and we somehow felt obliged to bend over? And the author parades his comments as required reading, borderline fugging curriculum, as though we are obliged to read those exalted passages in order to "get" the joke. When you have to use author comments to describe why your flash is meant to be funny, there is an alarm that goes off in the heads of the NON-gullible that makes them predisposed towards NOT finding anything in the flash funny. When will authors get that?

Now the comments themselves conjure up this story about one hapless scumbag named Derek Starch (a name riddled with suspicious satire that possibly floats over everybody-who's-not-a-Brit's heads) who penned and produced what was meant to be a grand production. Sadly, nobody cared to assist or even proofread the screenplay (which would have made all the difference), leaving Derek with the arduous task of doing it all himself. Then, like Timmy before him, upon finishing up his production, Derek was brutally raped by the friends he originally petitioned, and their ringleader, a true psychopath, stabbed himself repeatedly in the face. Anyway, the main issue with Mr. Pixel's story is that YOU CANNOT CORROBORATE ANY STORY OVER THE INTERNET! There's no way. You need to provide names, addresses, phone numbers... contact information, ya know? And nobody's stupid enough to try that, lest they get pranked out the wazzu by the delinquents running this site. That great conversation with the real Mr. Starch was very likely a fabrication. Again, don't bend over.

The possibly fabricated "origins story" compromises the vision of "Green Glob Conques Earth!", because it is likely just an elaborate hoax by some listless Brit with nothing better to do than spray his weird humor upon the rest of the planet. It's a joke on the audience... a bad one at that. It was fun to laugh at all the bad parts and try to decipher the alien voices, or to keep a straight face during the "lovers" sequences with an inflatable doll, or to wonder about how many stupid effects shots got butchered before they were even attempted.

Derision upon homemade film projects is a staple for Newgrounds to derail twelve year-olds. Perhaps the recent flash treatment of a thirteen year-old's awful "D00M" fan fiction, "I am the Demons!" prompted the use of D00M II music covers from the Portal, as a reference and a reminder of what this flash's theme and objective are. Trouble arises, however, as this flash's jokes had to drink two bottles of Ensure. See, Stamper already covered this territory far better and devised over half of the jokes that this flash rips off. Those segments were funny. The rest of it kind of... well, I don't know, sucked! Finally, the author rubs salt in the wounds of his audience during the credits, proving that the British are at the cutting-edge of class.

Thankfully, the author is not completely happy with this production. Good thing, because he might not attempt something so lame and abrasive again! The mission was completed--it looks and feels like a horrible homemade film--but it is possible to make no technical mistakes and yet still lose. That's not a weakness, that's life.

Hopefully the satire is taken another way, as a grim warning to the flash community that doing everything yourself is an exercise in futility, embarrassment, disappointment and wholesale self-destruction. If people look beyond the deliberate awfulness of the piece, maybe life will change for the better! Unfortunately, this context is only if you ever bother to read the author's comments, because the filmmaker's plight is not effectively represented in the cartoon itself! Still another reason this gets a zero.

Clockworkpixel responds:

wow i read the whole thing and you make failied points and believe me i'm not doing this again, as soon as i submited it i thought not doing this again.. i finished it for the sake of finishing and did not enjoy one minute of making this, this review cut alittle deep (the insult towards brit humor may well be true when trying to do a serious review not really needed) so yes i won't atempted this again or indeed even bother making anymore flashes i'm sick of people finding my work shit but finding a 20 secound short of sonic "AMAZING LOLOLOLOL" so why bother, you know what? keep my name on your rader (if you read this reply) if you find my next toon crap then well whats the point of doing this anymore,


ur so good :3

another great cartoon ;) keep it up dude,your awesome!

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Clockworkpixel responds:

Wow thank you so much :D

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Credits & Info

3.71 / 5.00

Mar 11, 2011
2:18 PM EST
Comedy - Parody