Please keep in mind that this is my first attempt at using Flash. This was done for a project. I have about 1 month of experience working in Flash.
Any constructive critisicm is very welcome.
Thanks for watching! :)
Not bad
Not too bad. A few smiling moments. Like the Cola Cruywagen parody. This is good for first year. Just make sure that when you erase things that you get it all :) The animation could use a little work but with your knowledge of flash this is good.
As for "I never want to see a CS5 workspace again in my life", learn to love it cause you are gonna see a LOT of it in VIO 202. :)
NOOOOOO!! Hahaha!
Thanks for the review, appreciate it. The whole "erasing" thing: I actually was like "WHAT??" when I saw it here on Newgrounds...it just isn't there in my original .swf!! What could cause that? But I know what you mean. At the end with the teleprompter? And also where the various Cruywagen's come flying in? I have know idea what could cause that.
Glad you got the Cruywagen thing. It's a shame that oversees people will only be like "yeah, whatever". Anyways, thanks again.
I Canned myself!
For a single weekend's work, well done. Same as what you said to me, compared to what some of the other classmates did, this is miles ahead!
Thanks so much
Yeah I agree, some students were LAZY! Haha, I wish I could do this story of mine a bit better...it was so much better in my head :)
Maybe oneday...
Cantastic!
I love it man! I lol'd at the ridiculous puns from start to end! beautiful!
Thanks man, I think you're making it better than it really is. Didn't sleep at all last night. Was just working on this. That'll teach me to leave my projects till the last minute.
But 03:00 in the morning scripts generally aren't well written.
But thanks for the review
I never want to see a CS5 workspace again in my life
Not bad for a first try
Positives:
The lip-synching is pretty good, and something much better animators struggle with.
It is reasonably well drawn, though it lacks animation in a lot of scenes
Music is well chosen.
Negatives:
A lot of scenes are lacking in animation (in particular when items are flying out of scenes). You could perhaps make more effort to make backgrounds interesting, with things moving around behind the action (even if it is a repeated motion).
The story was a bit slow paced, and the jokes were pretty poor (more grimace worthy than laugh worthy). Work on your scripting and pacing- it would be funnier if it was faster and the punchlines came more frequently. There was a lot of pointless dialogue that could have been axed without damaging the story.
Still, pass worthy, which is a victory in itself for a first timer.
Awesome, thanks! Everything you said was stuff that I felt was true myself. This is unfortunately because I was an idiot, and basically spent one night doing this. The lack of animations was pure laziness (I am sad to say).
But thanks so much for the feedback, next time I'll do all these litte things that I (and yourself) find lacking in this film.
PS. Yeah the jokes are very lame, that's kinda my type of humor though. I still don't think this is funny...rather grimace worthy -well stated. I just laugh for the "lameness" of it all
