Untitled Western

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Welcome to a macabre world where only the strongest survive. From twisted minds of Noah Bartel and Danny Benett comes a genre shattering epic that redefines cinema as we know it.

This is a small piece that me and Danny put together. It took about 4 full hours of drawing and music making.


nice flash

looks pretty good!

could use some color though, and the music just sounds like some guy whistling.

But the humor made me chuckle so its a 6/10

DivineN responds:

I will be doing an edited version with some tweaks and color soon. I am adding to the story too so keep watch. Thanks for the review.

Nice concept.

I like the story and I smiled at the duck. It is a bit short, but I don't feel like that's a problem. I feel like the length suits the content. I have some concrit, though.

Are you using onion skins? Especially on the hands and when the camera is moving up from his feet to his head (but many other places as well), your lines are jumpy. Thick, also. Try using a smaller brush or the pencil tool because the thick lines didn't flatter it well. Make sure to keep unwanted fluctuations out of your lines, as well. Clean them up, that is. It'll make the linework look more polished and it will also help with the jumpiness problem.

Try a higher framerate because the animation was choppy.

You did have a few nice perspective shots in there, like the hand shot for example, but speaking of perspective, there are some issues, particularly with that last shot with the building in it.

DivineN responds:

I thank you for your review, the choppy-ness of the lines where intended. That was the style i was going for.

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Credits & Info

2.38 / 5.00

Oct 11, 2010
12:27 PM EDT