Your drawling skills are average not bad but not good. Just continue to practice, practice, practice, learn, learn, learn that's all I can say.
Good use of backround music, it wasn't too loud; add it help set to the mood. The recording quality was good, but it did seem a little muffled, which is where you lost those ten points. However, I understand that getting a good mic is somewhat expensive and hard to do, so don't take the loss of points too heavily.
You storyline was ok, given it was a comedy so I don't expect a story that would rival Charles Dickens. You did have an original story, and not something that I've seen anything else come close to, so kudos on that.
It could be that it's just not my type of humor, but I didn't find it all that funny. Given I had a little laugh inside; especially the writing Santa Claus for a cup cake. It just wasn't, laugh so hard you think you might die, material.
Replay Value: 25/100
It was, however, funny enough to watch again in like a year or so.
Overall score: 290/500 = 58/100
Gave you a 2/5 on the submission vote.
Continue drawling and work on your jokes and you could have a great flash one day.
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"You must be a common scholar afore you can be a oncommon one, I should hope!" -- Joe from "Great Expectations" by Charles Dickens