Of a low visual rating
But still a couple of minutes worth of entertainment.
You have the idea down but there are things that are just keeping you 'below that line'
You used way too many of the same style jokes in your prologue and it just gets very boring to read very early, you need to add more options to actually juicing them too, and give more freedom in which clock to do and when.
There isn't anything more I can really think of now but then if I did think of anyhting it wouldn't ad anymore to it in the end anyway.
Nice work lad.