I'll tell it true.

It was okay, hopefully this will help you.

GOOD:
*Cool Story
*Cool Characters
*Good effects

BAD:
*You use movie clips to much. Vary it more.
*Use more sprite backgrounds.
*Improve your grammar.
*Work on fights a little longer.

If you do that, you should be good.

sweet

why do u make so many errors

Pretty good

This is a pretty good storyline. I feel the animation wasn't as good as you could be. A little more effort could fix the minor things like sound on more of the places that don't have sound and the green lines I see on the edge of the animation sometimes.

Ummm

Did you edit your script before you made this flash.

Your grammar is terrible. I'm sorry. I bet the idea is cool, but I can't even get it to make sense right now.

...

that was really stupid and pointless. cut the little green squiggles at the side n learn to talk english and it will be better. to be continue? how stupid are you?
decent idea for a story tho... i guess...