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Spawnmaster Ep 1

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Author Comments

Hi there! This is my first flash and i don't knew'it the Macromedia flash 8 have limite of frames that's why I don't put credits sorry for that, enjoy the movie!

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I really wish to learn to sprite as well as you can, your animation is smooth and competent. I love it!

Very nice!

This flash is more batter than Copper.When you´ve done Cooper i´ve like it but this one it´s awesome!!!And master roshi too it was very funny!lol!Good luck on the next episode!

don't give up

that score doesn't mean that your video is a crap, really you have done good work since your first flash ( Roshi vs Freeza). You have to put in the next flash, more story and new ideas and please...don't call me Daniel in Newgrounds xD hahaha here I'm Dan-Dark! and don't make that effect, I almost can't see very well my name and the Alvin's name hahaha, I knew about your problem with the fotogrames but well, you have more experience, you will know how make a better flash. some advice, try to make a good script ( check your english grammar) and make very good representation of the dialogues, I mean, the box with the words, sometimes your letter was very hard to read, or find actor voices it can be better for you.


dark-phantom1 responds:

yo man very thanks for the review and sorry for puting daniel xD, in the next episode i promise you i put Dan-Dark lol..!

Its very good.

but it need quite a bit of improvement to make it great.

You have clearly put in a lot of effort and it certainly has length. there are some nice touches including some little bits of huour and some bits and pieces of thought and story and some nice sounds.

However, its nearly all one long fight scen without any explanation or introduction. Who is this Spawnmaster? why is he running and jumping down the hole? You have to make this kind of story happen in order to make people CARE what happens to him. It is the quiet moments and the thoughts and the bright times which make the adventure seem exciting and important in contrast.

Also, having spent, I am sure, SO much time putting this good show together you really should have got someone who is good at English to read it through- someone who was NOT involved in the project who can see it objectively.

As for the credits, you need to put some into the notes right NOW, then edit the some of the boring, repetative action scenes a bit. All you need is one button on the end frame directing you to one single frame of static credits, for now at least. You may as well improve your interactivity by making a little menu at the end and including Scene Select, a one frame story background and a simple, one frame glimpse of the future in text- just a summary of how many episodes you plan, when you plan to have an alpha out of the next one etc.
For someone of your abilities, this is all very easy, surely?

Don't zoom in to a closeup of a pixelated sprite, it looks awful. Only zoom in if you are prepared to put in some detail to zoom into.
This story has SO much potential, take whatever time you need and ask for whatever help you need- its already so good you should get it.
Best Wishes,
IceDragon64 of the Dragons and Spirits

dark-phantom1 responds:

well very thanks for the time taken to write this review, yeah in ep 2 i will put the history of spawnmaster and you will see, and I'm not english.....lol


hes scrooged isnt he? awell that thing ownz

Credits & Info

4.63 / 5.00

Feb 19, 2007
3:11 PM EST