Very funny.
But you know what you forgot?
What did I forget, Jim?
You forgot the obligatory guy with an English and/or Australian accent! Because, as I'm sure you know, people with English and/or Aussie accents are up to 54% more believable than ordinary Americans. If YOU want to be more believable, if YOU want to get everything you ever wanted, just call now (right now, before you have a chance to think about it,) and order my program, and soon YOU can have an English and/or Australian accent of your very own. Here's how...
Yeah, you gotta love infomercials. The dregs of television programming, makin' lots of suckers out of girls and boys every night.
Cheers,
MJ