I liked the message
The message of the short was good, keep working on your graphics. Looks like you have some good material, just need to push the picture.
Author Comments
well, this is the second version of the film. its like the first but it has sound. i chose the slightly annoying song "happy days" because mr. smiths' happy days are over. get it? no? ok.
Well...
I see the humour, but this thing still needs work. The Happy Days song - while I understand why you use it - is totally misplaced. Playing it over the cartoon drowns out the cartoon itself. doesn't follow the animation, and it distracts from the reading. Hell, at first I didn't even realize it was coming from the 'toon.
Had you placed it at the end over the credits, it would've probably worked better as a punchline. But using Happy Days theme song is still reaching for straws.
Secondly, floating words are pretty bad choice. I would stick with balloons as they show a little bit more class, and little more effort. Of course, I would suggest that you throw out words completely and do some low quality (to save space) voice recording instead. Sound, almost 90% of the time, will improve a flash.
Work on your animating your people a little more, rather than doing talking heads on wooden bodies.
Umm like a title???
It was a good joke and it was pretty funny but it could have been longer cause with just what there is now, its pretty crappy but i gave it a good score neway.
hobo
ytrweyt6
Now that's a twist!
Now THAT is random humor!