i can die now.
i've already played the most magnificent game in the world.
:Snail:
January 10, 2010 –August 25, 2021
Here is its eulogy, a collection of the kind words written about it while still among the living. They shall live on forever in its place.
Author Comments
Ohhhh boy, this game. This here game. This. Game. Whoah jeez, this game.
First off, if you don't have awesome amounts of patience, you're better off somewhere else. This game takes a lot of dedication to beat. You're a snail. What do you expect?
This game was originally made for a competition on the "Longest Lasting Game" but I didn't win anything. Of course I didn't win anything when I'm going up against famous developers and major corporations with a whole damned TEAM of developers. I'm just one dude!
Well, here you go: one heaping plate of SNAIL. Don't worry, you'll level up and gain upgrades. Sorta.
Theres no music. Add your own soundtracks! While Turbo-Spinning, make race car noises! VRRRRRRRRRR EEEERRRRR SKEEEEEE ERRRR! While jumping, go WHOOOOSH! Play some crappy music you have stored on your computer to help the time pass and pray you don't break your right arrow key!
The ending makes up for the whole thing. I swear.
ALSO: For those of you who are asking "why the colons in the name?" its because "Snail" and "The Snail" were taken and I am uncreative so heres some colons
ALSOALSO: Oh hey, daily third. That is better than nothing.
Reviews
<deleted> responds:
Quick! Die while its still fresh in your mind!
Sound
Would be nice to have sound :>
<deleted> responds:
People would complain and say "Would be nice if it didn't have sound :<"
I see where you`re going...
The humour was a little dry. Graphics suited the game well. Nice idea to put "rewards" inside the game. The ending was a bit of a letdown, I was kind of hoping for a punchline or something. Not sure if you intended it as such, but it has good underlying theme/message. Definitely does not go down as a great game that I'll ever replay, but a decent way to kill 15-20...however many minutes I wasted XD.
I think anyone expecting more gameplay out of this after ou explicitly WARNED them needs to take a literacy exam.
9/10 (like I said, I was hoping for a bit better punchline at the end, though the fact that the "God-Form" was stylized as Hermes/Mercury was a good idea)
Which translates to a 4/5.
<deleted> responds:
I was going to make an alternate ending where Doctor Octagonapus blasts him right before the snail reaches the plant, but I decided against it.
i beat it.
all of it and i loved the ending.
its worth it in the end.
and the internet snail is pretty awsome to.
so is doctor octiganapos. (or however u spell it!)
i give it 10/10,
<deleted> responds:
Octagonapus.
Incredible.
That is all I have to say.
<deleted> responds:
I respond to every review but you're not giving me much to work with in this one.
Credits
Stats, Info & More
- Score
- 4.34 / 5.00