soooooooooooo
MUCH
Every time I look into a mirror, I start crying because I'm so happy I'm not you guys.
Whenever I breathe, I feel a little sad because I think that maybe one of you inhaled the same oxygen molecules at some point.
If I had a choice of living the rest of my life as a centipede or to receive one million dollars from the hand of any of you, I'd shoot myself in the head, because centipedes suck BALLS.
Sometimes, in my sleep, I dream that I'm on the BBS and there's no one there but me, and it's so great! But then I wake up and I puke.
Every time one of you complains, a Chinese person is born. Every time one of you talks about masturbation, an Indian person is born ( and later dies and is reincarnated as a yogurt bacteria as punishment), and every time you pretend you cheated on your pretend girlfriend, an American loses his job to outsourcing in Pakistan.
Every time you pretend to get drunk to start spamming, 100 acres of rain forest vanish in a puff of acrid cyanide smoke and extinguish at least 30 undiscovered plant species, each with the power to cure cancer or render us immortals with giant penises.
Which brings me to: every time you click on a topic about dicks, a grain of sand drops from the heaven and into the Sahara, and before 2003 it was a peaceful oasis of unicorns and enchanted meadows.
WHY?
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU THE WAY YOU ARE?
I HATE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCH
p.s. CLICK ON MY SIG : )
PLEASE :)
