I was reading my school's dress code the other night to see if there was some funny loophole I could exploit. There was the usually stuff like no gang apparel, and warnings for girls not to expose too much skin. This is when I realized it, it only really warned girls to not expose their "midriffs" and that skirts had to be a certain length. But it didn't say boys had a short-length requirement, or any requirement for pants at all. Nothing for shirts either. So I decided to go to school in the nude. Oh, but I had to wear shoes, so I wore some sneakers.
So I walked into school, in the buff as some may say, with a huge grin across my face. There were a bunch of people staring at me, but no one said a damn thing. I looked around, shrugged, and kept walking.
I went to my homeroom and my teacher just looked at me. Then she left the room and came back with the principal. He said, "What the hell do you think you're doing?" I just had this innocent look of confusion on my face. Before I said anything, the bell rang, so I said, "Sorry, gotta go to class now." I walked out into the hallway when I saw them. Raptor Jesuses, thousands of them. They gnarled and growled at me. I paused for a second, and then grabbed a mop out of a bucket that was next to me. I looked up at them. "Bring it."
They jumped at me, but my awesome skills knocked them back. I spun around and took out a few behind me. I swung the stick, hit a few, then skewered one on the mop. There were too many of them. I needed to change strategies. *DOOWEEEEE* A loud whistle sounded, followed by a boat crashing through the wall.
"Looks like you could use some Peanut Butter Crunch!" called a familiar voice. It was none other than Captain Crunch himself. I shouted, "Crunchatize me, Captain!" A stream of peanut butter shot out of the boat, and turned me into my ultimate form: Peanut Butter Stynger. I shot the Raptor Jesuses with my peanut ray and the principal with my butter ray (he was just screaming through the whole ordeal, so I had to shut him up).
Then I got on the Captain's boat and I was never seen again.
