Hey Tom that's great news btw everytime i go to the portal I get five or six pop-ups can you fix this problem?
I can see a problem with one of the top ppl's problems, paying to see NG?! That would suck!!! But I guess I can say anything and make a laugh, oh well, This site is great, and to pay for it? Jesus, seriously though, to lightn the mood, as a Christian, heres My look on church to make you ppl laugh and forget your tears. :)
A Homily Feeling
By: Church
Yup, Homily (Hom-ih-lee) is when a priest (pre-east) talks about the Gospel. The Gospel for all you non-Christ-believing-type-pupils is the Constitution of the Church, well, actually, it’s just what Jesus did, told four times. Seriously though, homilies are the best part of mass, here’s the Q&A of a homily talk.
Q: Who can tell me who Jesus is?
(Raised hands)
A: Uh, God?
Q: Is that your question, or answer?
A: Uh.
Yea, that’s how it starts, but then it becomes as degrading as a class photo. It sags all the way until the “priest,” probably swearing under his breath, walking back to HIS comfy chair, and the WHOLE time I’m sitting there laughing under my breath. Now don’t get me wrong, Jesus rocks! This is just MY perspective…
Another thing I find ‘hilarious’ is the answers to some of the questions, to explain them here is, ‘Matt’s Awsomely Funny Q&A For Homily Talk During Matt’s Time at Church’ or ‘MAFQAFHTDMTC.’:
Q: I heard there’s a law of gravity… who came up with that, is it on paper?
A: No, Isacc Newton invented gravity.
Q: What is the rate of gravity?
A: Jesus?
Q: Jesus?
A: Uh…
Q: I was looking for a number…
A: Jesus?
That’s only two, now I’m a normal guy, like you! Unless you’re not a guy, than no, I’m similar to you then, or maybe…
Anyway, sometimes Church can be fun (laughter), or REALLY boring. This is my pie graph (to NOT eat the graph): Church is 1% attention, and 99% perspiration.(?) It’s true, and the kneelers, oh boy, try doing stations of the cross on wood, it’s like trying to pass a math test, IT AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN. Anyway, I do “love” my Faith and you should too (not my faith, yours). However, religion is NOT something to bring up, but remember, 10% hate me, or is it the other way around. Of course we can’t forget after mass fun, which consists of: leaving.
Seriously, if you’ve watched the Simpson’s, Homer does what WE all want to do, don’t deny it, I remember being 2-4 years old and sleeping on the bench (or p.u) and having a “Chewey” bar during communion. It may sound weird, but I was young!
In conclusion, who’s line is it anyway? Also, if you’re Catholic, and you have a BORING priest, just say, “What would Jesus do?”
I’ll tell you, He’d be saying, “Thanks for coming! ” because Jesus ROCKS! But as I’ve said, “It could be worse, and it really does show, you could be in school, or watching a cheesy Matt show!"
