At 8/28/23 02:49 AM, vlsrb wrote:
OK, let's bite the bullet.
35 here. And if we're looking for a conversation topic to keep the thread going, can we talk about not feeling your age? Back when I was in my teens I honestly thought that people who are 35 have pretty much everything figured out in their minds. Functioning, responsible adults, y'know. Fast forward to now and, in many ways, I'm still that same teenager in my head. I think nothing really prepares you for the moment when you realize that nothing special really happens as you trudge forward into adulthood. You're still just you - you just have to find ways to deal with all the new challenges that are put before you that you didn't have to worry about as a child or teen. And ohhhh boy it's not easy.
Would love to hear other takes on this.
I might be barking up the wrong tree... Bear with me.
I feel as though far too many people act like the needless complexity of the modern world is normal in order to portray "normalcy" to others whether that's in the workplace or with family. There's too much pressure to have an outward appearance of "having it together" that people sacrifice their well-being to look the role rather than actually living. It gives people a false impression of what life is supposed to be and what happiness truly is. You MUST be (or do) this or that, otherwise you're living life wrong and there's nothing more sinful in the modern world than not fitting in.
I think that instills that sort of sensation of still being a teen in your head. While we have to (sometimes quite literally) put on costumes to go to work or mingle with groups, all we really desire is the freedom to just be. That feeling was easier to capture in teenagehood for most people, I think. Hence the phenomenon of people claiming their prime was in high school. They want to recapture that time when anything seemed possible again.
Personally, I believe being disingenuous is worse than being yourself. Pretending to be someone you're not for social status or money makes everyone around you suffer because at some point, your mask is going to slip. Your true face will look ugly to these people and it will only force your genuine self deeper inside. It stifles the growth of your true self and mentally, psychically, you feel trapped in your mind as a child or teenager or young adult, etc. Learning to cope with that is difficult and I think many people just go on autopilot.
So coaxing the real person out is a long, arduous task, and if the person has lived for decades that way, it can be nearly impossible. But that doesn't mean the task isn't worth undertaking, and it's certainly not hopeless. I feel "like a kid" (or a teenager) again in instances where I feel like myself the most. I believe that sensation is happiness: A joyful feeling about life and its possibilities.
Again, I hope I'm not wayyy off base here. Lol.
EDIT: Clarity...
