Scared shitless of Banta Claus.

[FUNKbrs]

I heard Banta Claus has gotten rid of most of the users on the NG forum.

I heard this year he's no longer handing out festive holiday bans, like he has in years previous, but is actively stalking and killing his victims.

I'm so confused, I thought Banta was a source of festive holiday fun, but no.

Apparently Banta was caught touching his elves innapropriately.

My heart is broken. How could Banta betray us like this?

[DrSevenSeizeMD]

I want to give you a heads up, but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra, and if I try anything, I'm dead too.

I enjoyed being your friend.

Wait, do you have friends? Or does your hatred prevent that?

I enjoyed whatever it was you and I had.

[DanielTheManiel]

At 11/28/17 11:47 AM, SevenSeize wrote: I want to give you a heads up, but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra, and if I try anything, I'm dead too.

He put a bunch of tiny needles all over my apartment, I'm scared to move.

[FUNKbrs]

At 11/28/17 11:47 AM, SevenSeize wrote: I want to give you a heads up, but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra, and if I try anything, I'm dead too.

I enjoyed being your friend.

Wait, do you have friends? Or does your hatred prevent that?

I enjoyed whatever it was you and I had.

The Path of Hate is a path of ownership and possession. Relationships are among a long list of things I own.

At 11/28/17 12:20 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

At 11/28/17 11:47 AM, SevenSeize wrote: I want to give you a heads up, but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra, and if I try anything, I'm dead too.

He put a bunch of tiny needles all over my apartment, I'm scared to move.

Watch out, they're barbed like fishhooks, so you can't pull them out. You have to push the rest of the way through the skin.

I thought it was snowing, but then I realized I was in the South and Banta Claus was sprinkling anthrax powder on my house.

I mean, I've put my foot in my mouth before, but I've never had literal hoof-in-mouth disease.

[DanielTheManiel]

At 11/28/17 12:51 PM, FUNKbrs wrote:

At 11/28/17 12:20 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

At 11/28/17 11:47 AM, SevenSeize wrote: I want to give you a heads up, but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra, and if I try anything, I'm dead too.

He put a bunch of tiny needles all over my apartment, I'm scared to move.

Watch out, they're barbed like fishhooks, so you can't pull them out. You have to push the rest of the way through the skin.

I think he is also pumping hallucinogenic gas into here, I keep seeing spiders everywhere and when I look back they are gone.

[DamnedByFate]

At 11/28/17 11:47 AM, SevenSeize wrote: but he has a bomb hardwired to my bra

I'm sure you can figure out the most obvious solution.

[FUNKbrs]

At 11/28/17 01:02 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

I think he is also pumping hallucinogenic gas into here, I keep seeing spiders everywhere and when I look back they are gone.

Have you tried using meth to counteract the gas?

[DanielTheManiel]

At 11/29/17 10:59 AM, FUNKbrs wrote:

At 11/28/17 01:02 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

I think he is also pumping hallucinogenic gas into here, I keep seeing spiders everywhere and when I look back they are gone.

Have you tried using meth to counteract the gas?

It's the next day, I thought it was all a dream when I woke up but now that I'm seeing that the posts are still here I don't know what to think.

[FUNKbrs]

At 11/29/17 12:24 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

It's the next day, I thought it was all a dream when I woke up but now that I'm seeing that the posts are still here I don't know what to think.

That's where you went wrong, trying to think.

You gotta trust the drugs to think for you.

[DanielTheManiel]

At 11/29/17 12:43 PM, FUNKbrs wrote:

At 11/29/17 12:24 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

It's the next day, I thought it was all a dream when I woke up but now that I'm seeing that the posts are still here I don't know what to think.

That's where you went wrong, trying to think.

You gotta trust the drugs to think for you.

But drugs have no brains, how are things without brains going to think for me?

[FUNKbrs]

At 11/29/17 12:45 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

But drugs have no brains, how are things without brains going to think for me?

Brains are just made of chemicals. Logically, then, chemicals ARE thoughts.

Ask any psychiatrist.

[DanielTheManiel]

At 11/29/17 12:56 PM, FUNKbrs wrote:

At 11/29/17 12:45 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

But drugs have no brains, how are things without brains going to think for me?

Brains are just made of chemicals. Logically, then, chemicals ARE thoughts.

Yes thoughts are chemicals but chemicals aren't exclusively thoughts.

That's like saying that because there are racists named Bob means everyone named Bob is racist.

[FUNKbrs]

At 11/29/17 01:00 PM, InspiroBot wrote:

Yes thoughts are chemicals but chemicals aren't exclusively thoughts.

Hey, I didn't invent the chemical balance model of mental health, I'm just explaining it as psychiatry explains it.

That's like saying that because there are racists named Bob means everyone named Bob is racist.

Have you even met Bob?

He's racist as shit.