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The Flower Who Ran

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The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-27 21:26:56


A quiet and serene awakening happened all at once. One moment, my world was desolate and empty; the next, my world was transformed into a bright and vast landscape. Waves of the feeling of joy seemed to radiate from the earth. I had come so far from being all alone to being surrounded by solace and others just like me.
This world, however ideal it seemed to be, did not revolve around me. This place wasn't created or staged for me-I discovered that one day.
As my kin and I were contentedly swaying in the gentle summer breeze, a silhouette of a foreign being was seen coming over the horizon. As it approached, so foreign in the way it moved, I wondered why it couldn't just reside as I in the grassy meadow. Yet, it bounded around my whole world as if it was normal. It couldn't be, though, since I haven't moved from this spot my entire life.
How strange it was while in motion. It just couldn't sit still, even to bask in the sun. But, I was surprised to see it at rest on one occasion. It rapidly expelled hot air as it laid down beneath me. I could feel the steady air beat against me.
So, this creature has the tendency to move and stay still as it chooses? How strange.
The creature came back again and again. I became used to its recurrence. In fact, I may have even started to look forward to its bold entrance everyday. Sometimes, it would come particularly near me and breath into me, which I found unsettling at first. But, soon I became accustomed to the gentle touch and the breath of the creature. How it pained me to see it leave everyday. No longer was I content to sit here idly anymore. Though dozens around me, my family, had rested all their lives, I yearned to follow the bounding creature beyond the horizon, away from the only world I had ever known. I needed to know what else there was.
For the first time, I was thinking for myself. I was thinking beyond the present, and into the future. I knew that the universe expanded to much more than just a meadow.
I desperately wanted to become like the creature, as our differences were apparent. It was much larger and stronger, though its body was soft to the touch. It had strange and rather awkward appendages-to run with, I suppose. I felt like this creature was the doorway to my destiny.
So sad was the time from then on. One day, as the creature laid down beside me, it appeared to wither in pain. Small, sad sounds came from it as drops of rain poured from it, like a rain fall. How I wished to comfort it. But, there was no way I could, so I only sat beside it, its suffering becoming my suffering.
That was the last time I ever saw the creature.
Time had taken its toll of my life force, and I gradually faded once again into darkness. But, as soon as I was completely submerged into the loneliness, I saw light. And, I stood up and ran to it.


I appreciate any sort of criticism on my writing; please, anything will make my day.

~Be Real

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-27 21:38:25


Really koolz!

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-27 22:56:04


An original story however I did not expect to feel pity for the creature but it wasn't a bad feeling in the end I felt the sadness for the creature as well for the main character. Then just as the darkness was at its max it ended on a light and happy note.

well done


The High Bunny Council Awaits

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Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-27 23:25:26


At 1/27/14 10:56 PM, Maltos wrote: An original story however I did not expect to feel pity for the creature but it wasn't a bad feeling in the end I felt the sadness for the creature as well for the main character. Then just as the darkness was at its max it ended on a light and happy note.

I'm glad I was able to express the appropriate emotions to my fellow reader.


I appreciate any sort of criticism on my writing; please, anything will make my day.

~Be Real

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 02:16:56


STOP PLAYING WITH MY EMOTIONS!!! its so good! ffs how do you do it?! xD

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 06:06:16


Another amazing piece of work, which really is no longer a surprise coming from you. I don't know if you've ever thought of being published and sharing your stories with a broader audience, but your amount of talent is clear and candid, you, my friend, have a gift a storytelling.


Today I learned I'm a pimp and a cool. Upvote me to karma heaven, bitches.

Here's my letterboxd that I don't update.

Here's my IMDb that I update more.

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 13:06:23


At 1/28/14 06:06 AM, fearthepiff wrote: Another amazing piece of work, which really is no longer a surprise coming from you. I don't know if you've ever thought of being published and sharing your stories with a broader audience, but your amount of talent is clear and candid, you, my friend, have a gift a storytelling.

I can't thank you enough for the support I am getting right now. This is helping me regain my faith in writing more publicly since no one would ever be this supportive.


I appreciate any sort of criticism on my writing; please, anything will make my day.

~Be Real

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 16:12:45


I can only think that it could be your writing style. It appears vary refined, to say the least. That could be what made this as moving as it is, as I cannot figure out what it is in particular. I see myself asking all these questions to myself. Does the flower know what it's getting into? Does it need to? What do the other flowers think? Where is the flower located? What is the creature?

Flowers aren't stupid. They're just ignorant.


Check out my profile for links to my writing. Also willing to review writing works on request.

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 16:15:57


At 1/28/14 04:12 PM, Kylpault wrote:

:What is the creature?

The creature is a human taking care of the plant.


I appreciate any sort of criticism on my writing; please, anything will make my day.

~Be Real

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 16:23:11


At 1/28/14 04:15 PM, MilesTailsPrower10 wrote:
At 1/28/14 04:12 PM, Kylpault wrote:
What is the creature?

The creature is a human taking care of the plant.

You did not just do that.

Oh god...it could have been a cow, or a insect, or anything! Why does it have to be a human...

Not that it's a bad literary move but now that my understanding has been opened, the poem is much more of a depressing tale. But there is a light.


Check out my profile for links to my writing. Also willing to review writing works on request.

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-01-28 17:59:52


At 1/28/14 04:23 PM, Kylpault wrote: Not that it's a bad literary move but now that my understanding has been opened, the poem is much more of a depressing tale. But there is a light.

I understand the recurrent depressing tone in my poems lately. I myself have felt a little out of it thus, I'll tend to, if not alway, express my emotions in my writing.


I appreciate any sort of criticism on my writing; please, anything will make my day.

~Be Real

Response to The Flower Who Ran 2014-02-02 10:36:52


Very deep thoughts expressed Really awesome .I Hope to expect more and more articles from you.


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