'Peer' Support Group

[Luke]

I had a thread like this months ago... Could be about a year by now... It's deleted or gone by now as I looked everywhere in C&C for it and have had no luck finding it... It was called Newgrounds Life Support or something along the lines of that...

Anyway, it's clear that a lot of Newgrounders have problems going on in their lives, some suffer from mental disorders, and their is a mental disorders group but that doesn't seem to be similar to the one I had or this one, rather than just discussing their disorders, I want to try and get a group of us who want to HELP one another through the problems going on, whether it be a mental problem, or some negative stuff going on in life.

Everybody has struggles and some more serious than others, at times we need people to help us through those problems...

Personally, I SUFFER from depression and anxiety the worst, I don't use the word suffer lightly or often, I mean I have those to the point where sometimes out of nowhere I just wish I could blow my brains out, no idea why but that's just how it is.
I learned though, that there is always a reason why, and there is a way to figure out the reason why, it's just hard to do, problems in lives are a struggle and nobody can really get through most of them alone...

I don't want this thread to be full of trolls or people bullshitting for laughs as people who actually do have problems / shit going on in their lives know how serious it actually is rather than the people who like to kid around about it for laughs when they're bored at home... It's serious shit.

The last thread didn't really get anywhere, but I hope this one can.
I've seen a lot of Newgrounders talk about suicide, and all sorts of other things... As I already said more than once, It's serious and as stupid as it sounds getting help or asking for advice on Newgrounds, it's better than nothing and it CAN make a difference.

I hope to see this get somewhere as we all need a helping hand once in a while.

Mods, if this doesn't need to be around for whatever reason, feel free to delete it.

I hope this can work out and I hope we can get some people talking to each other about what's going on with them and hopefully helping them through whatever it may be they're going through in some way...
Nothing negative can really come from this.

[noov]

Thank you for sharing a little bit about yourself, hopefully you were honest. Good to know there are people that are willing to help others. I'll try to help whenever I can :)

[Luke]

At 10/10/10 04:19 AM, noov wrote: Thank you for sharing a little bit about yourself, hopefully you were honest. Good to know there are people that are willing to help others. I'll try to help whenever I can :)

Glad to hear it and of course I'm being honest... Haha.
I also got bad anger problems which I try my best to totally forget about... But something just came up within the last thirty minutes that made me mad to the point where I'm shaking, and it's just some bullshit drama over the internet.
I need to learn self control basically... It's like one thing happens like somebody talks shit about me and I want to destroy that person... I hardly talk to anybody because I'm socially awkward basically, I have about three friends and that's it...

In all honesty I fucking hate my life, but here I am living everyday wishing I wasn't, like I said in the first post, life is a fucking struggle my man... It's tough shit but I really think it's worth it in the end... I dunno.

[noov]

I have no idea what they said to you but I wouldn't pay attention them. I learned that the hard way.. As for your personal life, do what you think is best for you but make sure you wont regret your actions later..

[Abuelodigital17]

It's a struggle indeed.
I think you should take a look at this page and try to figure out if you suffer from any of these disorders. It can help you figure out what's happening to you, why you act the way you do... It helped me.

[Luke]

At 10/12/10 06:22 PM, Abuelodigital17 wrote: It's a struggle indeed.
I think you should take a look at this page and try to figure out if you suffer from any of these disorders. It can help you figure out what's happening to you, why you act the way you do... It helped me.

Thanks... I'm looking few a few of these right now... Schizoid Personality Disorder actually sounds a lot like me...
I hardly talk to anyone, even at school where I've just about met everybody and could be friends with them... I keep to myself, I guess I'd rather be alone and I just don't notice it.
For example I met some new people on Sunday, they're some Juggalos that live on my street, they kept saying how I was quiet and stuff (I'm not really shy), and when asked to go over to their place yesterday I just said I couldn't without realizing I really could... I don't know... I'm going to keep looking at these.

Thanks again...

[Donut]

Nice thread, EF.
My story is here. I also added a final bit recently thats on the last page.

[Luke]

At 10/12/10 06:56 PM, Donut wrote:

My story is here. I also added a final bit recently thats on the last page.

Seems like it's mostly family stuff then eh?
Tough to try and give advice in situations like this because there isn't much you can do ultimately, it's up to them... Seems like they've just all gone through problems their entire life, I'd say it's safe to assume your dad has depression, not a doubt in my mind about that... He stopped smoking weed which is good because weed's actually classified as a depressant, it might help you get through things at the time but in the long run it doesn't help and has things in it that can make depression worse if you already have it... Same goes with alcohol, assuming from your post that your entire family drinks, I'd recommend somehow bringing it up to them that maybe it isn't a good idea for them to drink, most of the things you mentioned were problems that seemed to happen when they were drunk, if not most, at least some.
If you think alcohol is a problem there, try bringing it up in a respectful way and do whatever you can to not make it into any sort of fight or something, and that can be extremely hard especially mentioning it to people who are addicted (Not saying they are, but hypothetically), it can cause a lot of problems.

I don't know what to say about your sister... Not much you can do there either, she's twenty, she wants to do her thing and by the looks of it doesn't respect your folks very much, I'm sure that will change in time, maybe not with your Dad since he isn't her blood relative, but hopefully with your Mom, usually that's the case when they get older, they get along better...

Your parent's separating may not be a terrible thing since the relationship seemed / was so unstable, it's rough as hell going through all of that, I know from my own experience, fortunately for me my folks broke up when I was maybe two or three so it wasn't as tough dealing with that.

I don't know what else to say... Keep me updated though, I'll do what I can my man... Hope things get better for you.

[MindlessMax]

My mom just divorced my stepdad,which I'm happy about,but we can't afford anything anymore.All my friends are going away,and I'm paying for the internet.But not a single tear dropped from my face when my grandparents died.Am I sick when I can't cry at all?

[SeeD419]

I don't necessarily get depressed or really angry or anything, but I feel for those of you that do.

Just FYI, my life sucks as well, lol. It's just a never ending struggle with the economy the way it is, unemployment, and being in debt. I just try and be more positive about it and focus on the things that I do have.

Maybe I can stop by and give some encouragement to those in need =) I'm a good listener (reader) and will listen to your problems.

[Luke]

At 10/12/10 09:01 PM, MindlessMax wrote: Am I sick when I can't cry at all?

Not at all... As depressed as I am all the time, when some some sort of tragedy happens whether it be in my family or personal life, I find it very hard to cry, sure it hurts but I can never cry about those things for some reason...
Before I used to smile about it, like my dog died one time and when I was on the phone telling my brother I said it with a smile on my face and my Dad got pissed off, I was maybe eleven or twelve at the time, I catch myself doing it sometimes still about some things. I read somewhere that it's an early symptom of schizophrenia or something... It's not like I controlled myself to smile but it just happened on it's own kind of... So who knows.

At 10/12/10 10:33 PM, bgraybr wrote:
Looking at all of those disorders is making me kind of paranoid :P In all seriousness, I don't see how people are supposed to look at that page and diagnose themselves... if they have a disorder and have been to a psychologist then they are probably already well aware of whats happening to them.

Yeah, never diagnose yourself with something, if you really think you have a personality disorder of some sort, it's best to consult a professional about it and see what their opinion on it is, as much as I disagree with seeing specialists on things, they do know more about these things than anybody else for the most part... So it's always best to check what they think.

and I tend to develop a strong attachment to one person, regardless of whether or not they return the feelings...

Happens to me too, if I meet a girl who I find attractive or who is just a cool person, I can't stop thinking about them sometimes, and I think I have feelings for them in ways but I know deep down I really don't. I think it's a good thing to look at it and figure out if you really do have an attachment to them or not rather continuing to go on with those feelings. Search deep down inside yourself and find out if you really do, sounds corny as hell but eh... Just saying I understand where you're coming from with that one.

At 10/12/10 10:40 PM, SeeD419 wrote:
Maybe I can stop by and give some encouragement to those in need =) I'm a good listener (reader) and will listen to your problems.

I can't imagine how debt and unemployment is at once, I'm unemployed right now after a year of being dropped out of school, couldn't get a job without a grade ten education for the most part, so I decided to get my ass back in school. I wish you the best of luck, and appreciate that you'll stop in here every now and again to see what you can do..

It's good to see people taking interest in this club, the last one I had is god knows where and not many people really posted in it, four or five regulars maybe... Hopefully this one can pick up and last longer than that one did.

[huongnd]

At 10/12/10 10:40 PM, SeeD419 wrote: I don't necessarily get depressed or really angry or anything, but I feel for those of you that do.

Just FYI, my life sucks as well, lol. It's just a never ending struggle with the economy the way it is, unemployment, and being in debt. I just try and be more positive about it and focus on the things that I do have.

Maybe I can stop by and give some encouragement to those in need =) I'm a good listener (reader) and will listen to your problems.

Unemployment is a problem worldwide, it makes people lose confidence and bored with life, there really is something very bad

[Luke]

At 10/12/10 11:26 PM, huongnd wrote:
Unemployment is a problem worldwide

Yeah it is a problem, but no matter what there are always people looking to hire even with the economy how it is today.
I want a job pretty bad, but I don't want a job where I have to deal with a lot of people.
Rogers Video is hiring and my dad knows the manager there because he was her supervisor at a call center, she's really nice I guess, she told me to drop off a resume last time I was there. I'm just very hesitant to do it, not even sure why. I guess it's just because I haven't ever had a real job before, only under the table stuff...
Anyway, just giving this thread some CPR here.

[Athlas]

At 10/12/10 11:20 PM, EpicFail wrote: It's not like I controlled myself to smile but it just happened on it's own kind of... So who knows.

I have exactly the same thing. In moments of stress, or whatever you want to call it, the muscles in my jaw force some kind of weird laugh on my face. It has happened to me several times, but the time my parents told me they were divorcing is the one I remember most vividly. Or maybe I really was relieved. I don't know...

Anyway, I'm willing to tell a bit about myself, I just hope people won't have the "point and stare at the freak"-attitude I've received over the past three years. Some will probably say it's my own damn fault, but frankly, I don't care. Or I pretend not to. I'm not really sure.

Right now I'm twenty years old. I used to be a drug addict. The term is debatable, of course. When I was 17, I suffered, with the emphasis on SUFFER, from an LSD psychosis. I have only used lysergic acid twice in my life. Ever since, I've had two more psychoses (is that the right plural?).

I'll try to explain what I experienced during these absolutely inhuman states of mind later on, but right now I don't have the energy to do it...

Anyway, I've been clean for nearly two years now, and I'm currently in the process of getting my life back on track. Odds are I'll never be able to return to college, or even get a paying job.

They say that 'where there's hope there's will'. I don't believe in hope, but there's ample will.

Peace.

[Decky]

Its true that in are own ways we all have something admittedly some are far worse then others. Personally I suffer from Bipolar Disorder and have had problems with drugs in the past. It can be hard sometimes but you get though anyway you can. Anyway I'd be glad to listen to anybodys problems and give advise if I can.

[Athlas]

At 12/10/10 11:30 AM, Decky wrote: Its true that in are own ways we all have something admittedly some are far worse then others.

People tend to let the perspective about their own problems get out of hand, though.

Personally I suffer from Bipolar Disorder and have had problems with drugs in the past.

Bipolar Disorder is manic-depressive, right?

[Luke]

At 12/10/10 11:36 AM, Athlas wrote:
Bipolar Disorder is manic-depressive, right?

If I remember correctly, Bipolar Disorder is drastic mood swings, one moment you're on top of the world, the next you can be down in the dirt.
Not 100 percent sure though however.

Thanks for the posts guys, glad to see this thread getting posted in. I'll respond to the bigger post in a bit, working on an article for a website right now but just saw this had been posted in.

[Decky]

At 12/10/10 11:36 AM, Athlas wrote: Bipolar Disorder is manic-depressive, right?

Yeah, I think they just stoped calling it that for some reason. You don't really hear people saying manic-depression anymore, or that could just be what I've found.

[Sequenced]

My life at the age 12-16 I was in deep depression. I use to get bullied where people would shove me against a locker for " jokes " and throwing things at me when we're all in an assembly. Now I have Bipolar and it's hard to keep positive about things, but I try my best. I still have four good friends which I'm happy with and I love just playing risk and poker every weekend with them.

The worst is I can't trust my family with personal things. They're highly religious and I woke up from being a brainwashed retarded fuck head and I didn't even know what I was believing.

The only good thing about this is I gained self control, I am open minded and more compassionate for others. That also helped me in school because I didn't understand anything. ( I'm a whiz at maths now, and before I failed it for almost all my life ). If I hadn't moved to London for a tutoring school, I'll still be fucked now. When I move back for my last year of High School, I'm going to be anti social and just hang out with my few good buddies.

I also envied people with relationships (even if they do it for the label), because every girl gets scared if I try and be myself around them and when I ask them out.

Finally though, things are starting to do well for me. I'm a good Electronic composer now after six years of experience and I have a chance to get a lady friend. I act myself around her and she still likes being around with me. ( She even knows about newgrounds :3 ) Next week when school is finished for the Christmas holidays, I'm going to make my move on her :)

We all have ups and downs, but generally we become a better person through the bad experiences.

[Athlas]

At 12/10/10 01:48 PM, Sequenced wrote: My life at the age 12-16 I was in deep depression. I use to get bullied where people would shove me against a locker for " jokes " and throwing things at me when we're all in an assembly. Now I have Bipolar and it's hard to keep positive about things, but I try my best. I still have four good friends which I'm happy with and I love just playing risk and poker every weekend with them.

Friends will always accept you for who you are. If not, they're not really friends. It's nice to see yours belong to the former :-)

The worst is I can't trust my family with personal things. They're highly religious and I woke up from being a brainwashed retarded fuck head and I didn't even know what I was believing.

I know the feeling. Well, not the religious part, but the fucked up part most definetely.

The only good thing about this is I gained self control, I am open minded and more compassionate for others. That also helped me in school because I didn't understand anything. ( I'm a whiz at maths now, and before I failed it for almost all my life ). If I hadn't moved to London for a tutoring school, I'll still be fucked now. When I move back for my last year of High School, I'm going to be anti social and just hang out with my few good buddies.

Don't be afraid to open up to people who seem genuinely interested. Meeting new people can broaden your life. Or not, it entirely depends on who they are. I've learned that alienating myself from others doesn't really work in the long run.

I also envied people with relationships (even if they do it for the label), because every girl gets scared if I try and be myself around them and when I ask them out.

Finally though, things are starting to do well for me. I'm a good Electronic composer now after six years of experience and I have a chance to get a lady friend. I act myself around her and she still likes being around with me. ( She even knows about newgrounds :3 ) Next week when school is finished for the Christmas holidays, I'm going to make my move on her :)

Good luck man! I sincerely wish you the best of luck!

Also, having a creative outlet (I'm a musician too) is a great thing to have. Expression can be vital when trying to cope with oneself.

We all have ups and downs, but generally we become a better person through the bad experiences.

Sadly enough that isn't true for all human beings. Glad to see it does seem to apply to most :-)

[Luke]

At 12/10/10 01:48 PM, Sequenced wrote: My life at the age 12-16 I was in deep depression. I use to get bullied where people would shove me against a locker for " jokes " and throwing things at me when we're all in an assembly. Now I have Bipolar and it's hard to keep positive about things, but I try my best. I still have four good friends which I'm happy with and I love just playing risk and poker every weekend with them.

Bullying is the worst thing ever really, been through a lot of it even by kids smaller than me... Just never wanted to get violent, I had enough of that going on at home at the time, didn't need it at school too. Basically, I'd just go to school, leave a bit early and get home as fast as I could to be alone. I still find being alone is when I am most comfortable, even being with my best friends I can get uncomfortable sometimes, which makes no sense as I really only have two people I can call my friends and they've always been there for me. Good thing you got some good friends, I'm working on starting a D&D campaign with my one bud and my little brother, supposed to happen today.

The worst is I can't trust my family with personal things. They're highly religious and I woke up from being a brainwashed retarded fuck head and I didn't even know what I was believing.

Family is the hardest people to share personal things with, I would never share anything with them anymore.
I used to trust my Mom when I still talked to her regularly, she's a drug addict, coke and crack. So I think she understood a lot, and she'd always talk to me about things, she slimmed down a lot of the rules she once had and stopped being violent, when her now ex husband would be a dick to me she would back me up and she never did that before. However that all fell apart, I tell her one thing and eventually it is used against me, and I started doing the same to her, it became a war really and then her and my Dad got me arrested for a detox warrant, she told me she was going to take me out for lunch and when we got the to the burger king there was two cop cars there... Go figure. Never again will I open up with a family member, not worth it.

The only good thing about this is I gained self control, I am open minded and more compassionate for others. That also helped me in school because I didn't understand anything. ( I'm a whiz at maths now, and before I failed it for almost all my life ). If I hadn't moved to London for a tutoring school, I'll still be fucked now. When I move back for my last year of High School, I'm going to be anti social and just hang out with my few good buddies.

You know, that's the best way to do it I think. It seems a lot of people now just either don't care or they want to use you in any way that they can, maybe that is just how it is for me, who knows... I have two friends in this city and two friends outside of the city I have yet to meet in person but they both used to live here and have a lot in common with me, and they trust me enough to share their website with me, already they've boosted my pride and stuff... Always stick with your close friends, and with that you don't really need anybody else.

I also envied people with relationships (even if they do it for the label), because every girl gets scared if I try and be myself around them and when I ask them out.

I hear that.

Finally though, things are starting to do well for me. I'm a good Electronic composer now after six years of experience and I have a chance to get a lady friend. I act myself around her and she still likes being around with me. ( She even knows about newgrounds :3 ) Next week when school is finished for the Christmas holidays, I'm going to make my move on her :)

We all have ups and downs, but generally we become a better person through the bad experiences.

I'm glad things are going well for you now, it takes a lot to get through everything really, life is a never ending struggle but it is possible to overcome.
I hope things work out with you and the girl, I wish you the best of luck.

[TheSongSalad]

At 12/10/10 01:48 PM, Sequenced wrote: The worst is I can't trust my family with personal things. They're highly religious and I woke up from being a brainwashed retarded fuck head and I didn't even know what I was believing.

This is the case with me too. I feel like a whole different person around my parents. I only just managed to tell them I 'wasn't sure' I was christian, but the reality is I've been pretty sure I'm atheist for a couple of years now. It was pretty sad to not be able to ask them for advice or anything because everything they told me related to what God would want you to do, and otherwise might be bad advice.

I really don't have any issues with depression or anything like that, but I do have some sort of social anxiety I think. I always start thinking about what other people are thinking of me while I'm talking to them or something, and I'm a little bit paranoid that my friends are trying to screw me over behind my back sometimes. Anyone else have anything like this?

[Luke]

At 12/10/10 04:00 PM, TheSongSalad wrote:
I really don't have any issues with depression or anything like that, but I do have some sort of social anxiety I think. I always start thinking about what other people are thinking of me while I'm talking to them or something, and I'm a little bit paranoid that my friends are trying to screw me over behind my back sometimes. Anyone else have anything like this?

Definitely know what you're talking about here...
I have very few friends, but when I am with them I think that they think lowly of me for some reason, and my thoughts wander. I pay attention to their facial reactions and stuff when we're talking or just hanging out and they always seem annoyed or something, but I mean... If they were they'd not call me up right?

I freak out when I'm around a lot of people usually, a crowd bigger than three is enough to really make me want to get out of there, unless I am drunk I guess.
I stopped doing drugs because of anxiety and depression, but drinking gets me through some things.
For example at a concert if I am surrounded by people I will be really uneasy, but if I am drunk while I'm there I don't mind at all, I feel comfortable.
I hate being anxious in large groups and stuff, but I can't control it I guess, and I'm very paranoid of people, whether it be them thinking about me or them planning to fuck me over some how.

Even walking down the street and I see somebody my adrenaline gets going and I can't keep my eyes off them.

[Scarface]

I think I have Avoidant Personality Disorder. I'm not very shy, but very, very, very rarely do I ever let anyone get to know everything about me. Most people (even online) only know bits and pieces.

[Painbringer]

Instead on 'peer' support group we should call it the 'pier' support group.

Basically, if someone you know is suicidal, take 'em down to the docks and (threaten to) push them off the pier.

That'll teach 'em the value of life!

[TheSongSalad]

At 12/10/10 04:09 PM, EpicFail wrote: I freak out when I'm around a lot of people usually, a crowd bigger than three is enough to really make me want to get out of there, unless I am drunk I guess.

I don't mind large crowds for some reason. Walking across campus or being at a party doesn't bother me, but I understand what you're saying about watching people when you're on the street etc. I admit this makes me sound a little crazy, but I always watch other cars in the rear view mirror when I'm driving somewhere.

And I know pot can make me paranoid sometimes for sure. When I'm around friends it helps me not worry, but around my parents all I think about it to make sure they can't tell I'm high. I stopped smoking unless I'm going to be out a few hours at least because of that.

[HeavenDuff]

At 12/10/10 07:01 PM, Painbringer wrote: That'll teach 'em the value of life!

And what if they kill themselves?

[Painbringer]

At 12/10/10 07:19 PM, HeavenDuff wrote:

And what if they kill themselves?

If threatening their life isn't enough to convince them not to, then no amount of talk would be either.

[Luke]

At 12/10/10 07:14 PM, TheSongSalad wrote:
I don't mind large crowds for some reason. Walking across campus or being at a party doesn't bother me, but I understand what you're saying about watching people when you're on the street etc. I admit this makes me sound a little crazy, but I always watch other cars in the rear view mirror when I'm driving somewhere.

I watch the people behind me when I'm in a vehicle all the time too, and one time it paid off cause the dude was riding our ass, eventually he rolled up beside us and threatened to kill us because we didn't go right away on a green light, so he sped in front of us and slammed on the breaks fucking up my Mom's car. But I got to point out he was yelling shit at us and shit, dude yelled at me saying he was going to kill us and shit too... Crazy drunk old bastard.

And I know pot can make me paranoid sometimes for sure. When I'm around friends it helps me not worry, but around my parents all I think about it to make sure they can't tell I'm high. I stopped smoking unless I'm going to be out a few hours at least because of that.

Yeah, my paranoia was a lot worse when I smoked weed, every night I walked home when I couldn't find a ride I had my eyes on every person walking by and every car passing.
It did help me a lot with being around people and made me talk more but that only lasted a little bit before my anxiety got really bad around people when I was high. Haven't done any drugs in a month or so now.

[Luke]

At 12/10/10 07:33 PM, Painbringer wrote:

At 12/10/10 07:19 PM, HeavenDuff wrote:

And what if they kill themselves?

If threatening their life isn't enough to convince them not to, then no amount of talk would be either.

I'll have you know that the thread is not to convince people from killing themselves, it's for people who either have some disorders they can't cope with or are going through things they can't cope with, or both. Or maybe they just need to vent and blow some steam, maybe they need some advice. That's the point of this.

Your post before the one I am quoting is ridiculous, and really pointless to the club, and I requested a mod delete it for that reason.
Thanks for the contribution though, although you come off as a jack ass.