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written/recorded/performed/produced by me


Rain, I will take in stride

Follow me, through this endless tide

Damp with brine, hand in mine

It’s a beautiful rain, such a beautiful rain

Shimmering, a thousand feet above

Drowning, but we don’t really care

We don’t even notice, we don’t even struggle

We’re an ocean machine, we’re an ocean machine

Gravity, bring me to my knees again

Shower me with everything

I’ve seen nearly everything

Don’t run away, surf along the seventh wave

Gravity brings me to my knees

Brings me to my knees

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I like the mellow riffs at the beginning. There’s a bit of atonality in the texture by around :15, but I'm really enjoying the lyrics. The echo/delay effects on the vocals were a bit cheesy, and might’ve felt more well-rounded with some richer atmosphere around them - reverb and chorus effects and such. The way you articulate some of the words at the ends of lines (“stride,” “tide,” “brine,” etc.) was a bit overdone, and occasionally the vocals sound a bit flat there too. I’m really enjoying the additional layering at 1:08, and the intensity of the refrain at 1:22 was really nice. The echoed bit during the second hook at 2:24 was a fun detail. The solos at 3:18 are really nice too, although the percussion that was playing at that part sounded a bit dry in the mix. I like the acoustic guitar and the percussion instrument itself, though. The ending comes on a bit suddenly, but the plethora of dynamic melodic content still helps complete the arc of storytelling here. Overall, some of the vocal editing and compositional details didn’t quite work for me here, but I still really admire your guitar and vocal skills, sense of progression, and memorable melodies. Keep at it, Verbicidemusic! ^_^

Mixing, mastering, and balance
Structure, transitions, phrasing, and variety
Melody, tonality, harmony, and texture
Instrumentation and sound design
Emotion, atmosphere, and catchiness
Originality and uniqueness
Overall (how do the elements above interact?)
Composite score

Really like the harmonics over the blink-182 esque muted clean chugs.

I think the vocals could be mixed a lot better, compression in particular. This style would probably sound a lot better with a megaphone-like saturation and distortion on the vocal until the chorus. OneKnob saturator and pressure plugins by waves do a nice job. The section before 1:55 has a nicer sound. Clean these vocals just sound demo-y. Nothing really wrong with that. It could be delivery.

2:27 you sound more confident.

That said, this is quite literally just about my only complaint about this song. I really love it. I think with compression the vocals will come out like you want over top the chorus and shine.

Other aspects of the piece are brilliant.

I'd like just a little more high end on your ... are those tablas or darabukas? Maybe some spatial movement. But this section is very nice.

All in all I really enjoyed this piece. It was a journey. It was soulful and original, while at the same time distinctly nostalgic.

If we could have ended on a i chord rather than a fade out, my day would have been complete.

Thanks for coming out to NGUAC!

verbicidemusic responds:

Thanks so much for the in depth review! I definitely concede that the mix leaves much to be desired. A lot of these things that you pointed out didn't occur to me until I had listened to it on other devices. But by then I had already submitted it for judging lol. Luckily, I'll have you and the other judges critiques and my own personal retrospective to work off of when preparing this to be released officially on my upcoming EP. So needless to say, I appreciate this feedback immensely. Cheers!

-Official NGUAC 2020 Final Round Review-

The beginning is so-so: panning the guitar to the left and the drums to the right in the first seconds, unfortunately isn’t a good start. The vocals, even if a little detuned at first, are pretty good, even if they could have been more impactful and a little higher in volume in the sections at 1:21 and 2:50.
I found the final section starting at 3:21 way too long, to the point of being overwhelming: if you were looking for a conclusion in it, I think it should have been much shorter. If you were trying to make a different section, you could have alternated calm sections with strong ones, maybe with the electric guitar you used in the drops, which I enjoyed quite a bit to be honest. The drums were really nice as well. The concept behind the mix is promising, but it feels like it’s kinda rushed: just a little more tweaking, and it could’ve become an even more interesting piece of music.

Originality: 1.6/2
Composition: 1.8/2
Structure: 1.8/2
Tecnicity: 1.2/2
Impact: 1.5/2
Total: 7.9/10

Guitar work on this is absolutely phenomenal--envious even. Definitely excited to check you out further.

verbicidemusic responds:

wow, thanks a bunch man, i really appreciate it! your work likewise seems right up my alley, so imma have to shoot you with a follow, friendo.

Credits & Info

4.00 / 5.00

Sep 7, 2020
7:18 PM EDT
File Info
12 MB
5 min 14 sec

Licensing Terms

You are free to copy, distribute and transmit this work under the following conditions:

You must give credit to the artist.
You may not use this work for commercial purposes. *
Share Alike:
If you alter, transform, or build upon this work, you may distribute the resulting creation only under a license identical to this one.

*Please contact me if you would like to use this in a commercial project. We can discuss the details.