I like the funky bass at the beginning, even if it’s a bit dry. I’d encourage you to be careful about putting so much reverb on the kick at :08. It can make your mix sound pretty muddy if the texture is thick enough. That said, I didn’t notice any huge problems with the mixing, besides it being a tad quiet. I think the texture is a little bottom-heavy at times, without a lot of mid and treble-range tones. The texture also consists of a lot of catchy, albeit repetitive, riffs that don’t have a lot of forward motion to them. Perhaps fittingly, there are a couple of jarring transitions here that you use to bridge the gap between sections, like at 1:32.

I like the frantic harmonies and the rhythmic content, but I wanted to see you give the piece some more shape - ebb and flow over time will help maximize the emotional appeal of your piece, which is especially important for keeping your audience engaged with such a long piece as this one. Nevertheless, I like the gradual build in intensity with the percussive instruments at 2:05. I think that’s a good start towards establishing the kind of dynamic composition I’m looking for. That said, the transition at 2:05 only really served to introduce what I thought was a pretty clunky snare sample at 2:18, instead of taking the harmonic material in a meaningful new direction.

I’m beginning to think that you should try consolidating some of your compositional ideas here. I think it’s helpful to envision a story while you’re making your piece. If your story is a movie, and I had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the movie, I might choose to go somewhere in this middle section of 1:32-4:13. I think there’s very little sense of direction for most of that section, especially in the harmony, and even during transitory moments to the sub-sections, there isn’t a sense of gradual build and flow but of sudden entrance and interruption. Try to think about the “going to the bathroom during a movie” analogy when you’re making your piece, and cut out repetitive or structurally flat content as necessary.

One thing I like about this middle section, though, is the creative drum beat at 3:43. It has a great sense of drive about it, and while 4:13 is another abrupt transition, I feel like the piece has come together more so at around the 4-minute mark than anywhere else. What’s still missing is some strong melodic content (I think the melodies in here now are a little too frantic and fleeting to satisfy my melodic craving) and smooth transitions.

I thought the two-part fade-out ending you had in here was a little bizarre. I momentarily appreciated the idea of a “return to the solo bassline” like you had in the beginning, but I think it would’ve worked better if you had cut off the bassline on the downbeat after the melodic instrument fade-out and ended the piece like that. It probably also would’ve sounded smoother if you had some more reverb or delay effects on the melodic instruments, so that the first fade-out feels more gradual atmosphere-wise than it is note-wise.

Overall, there are a lot of good ideas here. The melodic riffs are catchy, the production quality is solid, and the sound design, while a bit cheesy, fits the thematic content well enough. You just needed a bit more of a “flexible” feel to your composition and arrangement that wasn’t quite there, and some more mixing effects could really enhance the sound design and atmosphere of the piece. Keep at it, PanBat! :)

Mixing, mastering, and balance
1.75/2
Structure, transitions, phrasing, and variety
.75/1.5
Melody, tonality, harmony, and texture
1.25/2
Instrumentation and sound design
.5/1
Emotion, atmosphere, and catchiness
1/1.5
Originality and uniqueness
.5/1
Overall (how do the elements above interact?)
.5/1
Composite score
6.25/10