I hear the idea, I see the ambition. I think it needs a bit of tinkering though, you're vocal synth overpowers your mix from 1:00 to 1:45, if you roll it back it would allow the track to breath. Right now it's just a bit overwhelming.
I LOVE your transition though, some solid emotion in them strins, horns and synth. Roll the strins a tiny bit back and add some verb it'd be beautiful.
In my humble opinion I reckon you ditch the first section and develop the 2nd section, there's money in there.
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pitbulljones