Watch out for those machine gun attacks on your snare rolls. I'm also not sure why the march is swung, and those rimshots could probably go as far as I'm concerned. The track is missing some... je ne sais quoi.

Writing wise, this is not a bad piece. It's got a definite theme -- could probably use a little overarching melody. I'm not sure how to critique really, as my only other critique would center on your midi instruments. I recommend Black Noh Snare for a more natural synth snare. Probably synful orchestra for natural, low CPU strings and winds.

That's really all I can say.

I think it's interesting that you have swing in a marching song. It makes things sound a lot less steady and domineering than you'd expect, and it has a bit less energy, too. I don't feel like the slow laziness was intended, otherwise you probably would have played to your strengths and made it more decisively slow. As it is, the tone of this song seems kind of inconsistent.