Your mixing/flow is ... a little weird. Reminds me of Wiz Khalifa minus good production values. I hope you haven't <em>actually</em> had a lobotomy, although that would explain why your verse just sort of seems to poke and hope when it comes to syllables in a series. Your actual rhymes are ok. Your structure is lacking and we're left wondering what is going to rhyme with what. Confusing your audience like it's some kind of incomprehensible opera is never a good thing because then they can't get into it.

Also hope not everyone copies you because I really couldn't deal with the same loop laying down in the background not doing much of anything to supplement the track. The way it's mixed, it makes your acapella sound really heavy on the right channel. Sounds like you've got cheap or no equipment here but you left it dry, no FX. I've certainly heard worse things, but this one needs to go back to the drawing board. I don't know if you made this beat yourself or not, but whoever did needs more experience. Maybe some YT tutorials.

Mixing, I could spend all day telling you what's wrong here, but in the future, just make sure if your beat has some weird ass panning like this one you record your verse 2-4 times and pan it as well. Think old Tupac tracks. Most kids these days don't know shit about olskool mixing, but rehearsal and multiple recordings were the saving grace. If you can't hack that, don't use a wack beat. Also, think about what you're actually saying and if your audience can actually get behind this. Rap these days might be about talking about yourself, but you're also talking about what your audience wants.

This sounds either like a freestyle or written verse that just wasn't rehearsed. Definitely not the best I've heard, but not the worst either.