I like the intensity at the beginning and the tremolos (:01 - :09). The drums at :11 are a little over-stimulating, though. I appreciated that they were nice and up-front in the mix, which drum mixing is often overlooked in metal tracks in my experience. The piece has constant energy to it, which doesn’t provide much sense of direction or structural ebb and flow. I think you needed to strip away a lot of the textural elements here at some points to allow for a greater sense of contrast and climax. I also would’ve focused on creating a sense of development within the phrases (varying dynamics within specific sections, etc.). You also occasionally introduce various themes quite suddenly, such as the melodies at 2:28. And I also don’t think the stop-start transition at 3:46 worked very well. It ended up being quite jarring, actually, especially since the section at 3:48 was so different from what preceded it. The song ends quite suddenly, and it’s hard to keep track of any overarching sense of structure here. You had a lot of good ideas here, but I would’ve focused on fleshing a few of them out instead of jamming a lot of them together in succession. The result is that this piece lacks coherence and direction after a point, even though it has several distinct self-contained sections. I would suggest focusing on building on the themes you have earlier in the piece rather than introduce new ones after, say, ⅔ of the way through. Still, overall the mixing and mastering are solid, your melodies are enjoyable, and I enjoyed the nice full texture you had during the intense sections of this piece. The part that needs fixing IMO is that “the intense sections” are basically all of the sections, giving the piece a structural flatness and inhibiting your ability to create melodic development, dynamic contrast, etc. The piece still has melodic variation, but without being grounded in structural cues and past riffs the coherence of the piece breaks down. Fix these compositional complaints and you’ve got a really solid piece here, my friend! Keep at it, man. ;)
7.5/10
Metallica1136 
