Hmm... Perhaps tone down the cymbals a bit. Does the snare and kick suddenly get louder at/after the middle transition, or is it just me? This really isn't my style, but I can suggest you ask TheHeartgrinder and Ignis_Animae. Grinder is good with low tempo stuff and Ignis is good with atmospherics and pads and stuff. They might be able to help more than I.