I like the atmospheric synths at the beginning. It progresses a little slowly, but I think it was fitting for this kind of piece. I enjoyed a lot of your individual riffs here, like the one at :31, but I think you need more effective transitions in between them. The melody at 1:01 is really neat. A lot of your instruments are really cool, and I enjoyed the structure of this one. Still, I think it might need a little more coherence. I understand that you repeated some of the sections of this piece, but you need to keep some of the instruments the same across the various sections so that a casual listener can follow what you're doing a little better. I liked the ending, though. It was cute and conclusive.

Still, my main problem with this piece is the mixing. Do you hear how, all of a sudden, that synth riff you have at the beginning gets a lot quieter once the flute-like instrument comes in at :16? That's because some of the frequencies in the flute are interfering with some of the tones in the intro synth. You can fix that through a process called mixing. This is the same reason why the snare drum seems pretty strong at 2:05, yet it starts to sound quieter at 2:08 when you have that pad change notes. Let me give you some basic tips that'll help you make this song sound louder, clearer, and less distorted so that you can hear all the instruments equally well:

I'm not sure which software you use to make this music, but I know a lot of people use FL Studio to make this kind of music, so I'll start there. First of all, press F9 in FL Studio. The window that just came up is called a mixer. If you click on the "master" tab, there just might be a box on the right side of the window that says "Fruity Limiter." Please click on the arrow next to that box, and then click "none." You NEVER want there to be a limiter on the master channel. EVER.

Another great thing you can do to limit distortion is called Equalizing, or EQ'ing, for short. I won't delve too deep into this now, as it's pretty complicated, but I will give you one basic tip which should really help you out. In each mixer tab (that is, for each instrument you have), click on the arrow next to the box that says "1," on the right-hand side of the mixer window. Then scroll down to "Parametric EQ 2." You can experiment with this more on your own or consult YouTube tutorials on how to use it best. For now, though, a little will go a long way: drag the knobs below 200 Hz (there's a scale at the bottom of the EQ window) all the way down to zero for EVERY instrument EXCEPT the bass and kick. A ridiculous proportion of the distortion in most songs come from bass frequencies. They just make everything sound muddy. Anyway, I hope all this helped. ^^

I'm giving you all this advice because I really wish someone had told me all this 3-4 years ago. XD Your piece has a lot of potential, though, man. Mixing is tough, and it's best to start working at it as early as possible. If you have any questions about the advice I gave, just PM me! ;D Good luck man, and just keep on producing! ^_^